Life I Left Behind
by Aint It Fun
Summary: What's worse? Facing an army of the undead, or facing it with your former childhood best friend turned frenemy that you haven't seen in ten years? Charlotte Asher, aka Charlie, is about to find out.
1. Chapter 1

**_Six years old_**

_ Vanilla ice cream was my favorite. I was always real excited when my mama let me have some. I'd eat it as slowly as possible, hoping it would just last forever. Today, though, the sun was making that harder to do. The cold, sweet goo dripped down the sides of my cone and all over my hand. No matter how fast I tried to eat it, it seemed to melt twice as fast._

_ "Ya got ice cream all over yer' face." A voice said._

_I glanced up from my ice cream. A boy stood in front of me. I knew I had never seen him before. He had on a striped shirt with a pair of dirty, tattered jeans. His sandy brown hair was sticking up everywhere. I stuck my tongue out at him._

_"I don't care." I said smugly, taking a big bite off the top of my ice cream. The cold stung my mouth._

_"Ya look stupid." He shot back, crossing his arms over his chest. I glared at him hard._

_"You don't gotta be so mean. Go away." I stood up, wiping my free hand on my dress. I knew mama would be mad if I got it dirty, but I didn't care. I hated dresses anyways. "You're just jealous you don't got any." I turned to leave and head back up my driveway when the boy started talking again._

_"My daddy never lets us have none." He said quietly. I turned around, shocked. He had a sad look on his face._

_"Never?" I asked._

_He shook his head and was quiet. I stared at him hard before finally thrusting the rest of my ice cream cone at him._

_"Here. You can have mine."_

_His eyes shot up to mine, looking surprised. They were blue, like the sky on a nice day. I decided they were the nicest thing about him. _

_"Why?" He asked, but didn't object, taking the cone out of my sticky hand._

_I shrugged my shoulders. "Cause you don't got none and I'm already full anyways." He bit into the cone and I giggled. "Now you got ice cream all over your face too."_

_He gave me a small, unexpected smile._

_"What's your name, anyways? Mine's Charlie. C-H-A-R-L-I-E." I spelled out for him proudly._

_The boy took a break from the ice cream cone and gave me a weird look. "Charlie? Ain't that a boy's name?" He asked, wrinkling his nose at me._

_I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest. "It's short for Charlotte, dummy. Now what's yours?"_

_Just then, a harsh voice called out and made us both jump. "Where ya at, boy? You best git' ya ass home in the next five minutes!"_

_I stared curiously down the road. We didn't have many neighbors out here. "You live close by? Is that your daddy callin'?" I turned back to look at the boy and was surprised to see a frightened look in his blue eyes. His grip had tightened so hard around the ice cream cone that he had crushed it and the vanilla covered his whole fist._

_"I gotta go." He said quietly. He dropped the cone and bent down to wipe his hands on the grass. He stood up and gave me one last look. "See ya', Charlie." With that, he turned and ran down the road towards the voice that was still hollerin'._

_"DARYL! I said to git' ya ass home NOW!" It called again. It made me shiver a little. His daddy sounded real mean. I watched him run home until he disappeared down a distant driveway and was out of sight. Daryl. That must have been his name. I looked down at the ground where the ice cream had melted into a puddle and already tiny little ants were marching through it. _

_He never said thank you for that ice cream._


	2. Chapter 2

Two months. Sixty days tops. That was all the time it took for the world to go to shit. What had started out as just a tiny blip on the world's radar had quickly escalated into what was easily the most wide spread and horrifying epidemic the world had ever known. No one saw this coming. How could they? Horror movies weren't supposed to come true. The dead were supposed to stay dead.

I swung my baseball bat as hard as I could. There was satisfying 'crack' as it met the target. The walker's head jerked backwards and remained bent at sickening angle. I swung one more time and the skull broke open. The mangled corpse finally fell to the ground where it was still. I panted heavily leaning against the trunk of a tree. 'One down, a gazillion more to go', I thought to myself bitterly. I wiped the thick, black gunk-like blood off my bat and onto a patch of grass. I made a face. While it didn't make me physically sick anymore to take down a few walkers, it was still disgusting. I wiped the sweat from my brow with a dirty sleeve. The Georgia sun felt hotter than ever today. I couldn't wait to get out of the heat and disappear into the shade for a while. I glanced down at the walker and nudged it with the toe of my boot.

"Serves you right, dumbass." I muttered. I slung my backpack onto my shoulder once more and headed off in the direction of my temporary home, which was nothing more than old barn a couple miles off the main highway. Judging by its horribly dilapidated condition, I was guessing it had been abandoned long before dead people had started trying to eat me. The paint had dulled to a faded maroon color, peeling off in thin little chips and the tin roof was just barely there, tiny little holes eating away at its rusted exterior. It was a miracle the thing was still standing.

I slid open the heavy wooden door just enough to slip inside before heaving it shut again with a grunt. It was mostly empty inside. Just a few broken down pieces of farm equipment and a whole bunch of hay and dirt everywhere. The one redeeming quality it did have was the tiny loft space. Using an abandoned, old tractor as a footstool, I was able to climb up to the ledge and pull myself up. Up there was my safe haven, though it wasn't much in the grand scheme of things. Just a place to crash at night and to store the few belongings I carried with me; a backpack, a ratty sleeping bag, one metal baseball bat, a hunting knife, and a small revolver that I rarely ever used. Yep, that was it. I carried light these days.

The sunlight was dwindling, the few rays of light that managed to sneak in through the cracks in the boards and the holes in the ceiling were beginning to fade. I supposed I would have to try again tomorrow. I had discovered a tiny little town on an old map that used to belong to my brother. It was a few miles south of where I was staying. It was off the beaten track a little ways, so I had been trying to find it for the past two days. If I was lucky enough, I'd find more than enough extra supplies there to keep me going a few weeks longer. Today and yesterday had both been a bust, though. Yesterday, I hiked in the wrong direction and today I ran into a herd of walkers and had been forced to turn back. So tomorrow, I would begin again. Third time's the charm.

I chewed up and swallowed a hunk of slightly stale bread and swished it down with a tiny bit of water before crawling inside my makeshift bed that consisted of my sleeping bag and a pile of hay. I had to admit, it wasn't the worst place I had ever slept. I didn't complain much these days. What was the point? It wasn't like there was anyone around to listen to me. In fact, that might have been the worst part of being out here alone. The silence. There were days it felt it would just swallow me up. So sometimes I sang to myself. Quietly, as to not attract any walkers, but I would sing or hum. I had this bizarre, ridiculous fear that if I didn't use my voice from time to time, that I would just forget how altogether. It was stupid, I knew that, but it didn't stop me from feeling that way from time to time. Singing was alright. I would worry about my sanity when I started having full on conversations with myself. But it was just so…exhausting. There really was no other way to describe it. Being alone made me exhausted. What was the point? What was the point in trying so hard to stay alive when there was no one even left to live for?

No. I mentally shook myself. I had to stop those kind of thoughts. The bad kind that would creep into my head when I was feeling low and lost and try to plant themselves there. It was hard lately. They kept happening more and more, pressing in against me until it felt like I would just suffocate. If Gabe was here…if he was here he would hate to see me think like that. I couldn't think like that, for his sake.

Gabe.

He should have been here with me, hiding in this stupid, crappy barn complaining about how hard it was to sleep in all this itchy straw. If he were here, none of the bad stuff would matter so much. Everything would be a little bit more bearable.

'He's not here, though' a soft voice at the back of my mind reminded me. I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, pressing my palms into my eyelids, willing myself not to think about the last time I had seen my little brother. I refused to believe he was really gone, despite what I had seen that day. He was the real reason I couldn't leave Georgia, no matter how badly I wanted to get away. He was the real reason I never strayed too far from Atlanta, where we had spent the last of our time together. Deep in my gut, I had this feeling that he was still out there somewhere and if I just waited, I'd see him again. I held onto that feeling with every ounce of life I had inside me.

It was all I had left.


	3. Chapter 3

**_8 years old_**

_"Mama made cookies." I announced happily, as I bounded towards the creek. I held out the chocolate chip deliciousness in my hand and the sandy haired bow in front of me snatched it away, stuffing it in his mouth in one whole bite. I suppressed a giggle._

_"Thanks." He mumbled, his mouth full. I rolled my eyes and plopped down onto the damp ground to pull off my shoes and socks. It was yet another warm, beautiful day and I was determined to spend it catching as many tadpoles and frogs as I could. At least until my daddy got home from work and hollered at me to come home. He and mama would be furious if they knew who I was playing in the creek with._

_"Yer' mama an' daddy know yer' down here with me?" Daryl asked, as if reading my mind. He waded deeper into the creek until the murky water washed over his knees._

_"Nope. They don't gotta know everything. Plus mama is busy takin' care of Gabe." I answered simply. I stuck my toes in the cold water before sloshing through the water to join him. "Anyways, I think it's stupid they don't want us to be friends."_

_Daryl nodded his head in agreement, his eyes scanning the water for our prey. I squatted down into the water, the ends of my dress dipping into the wet surface. I didn't care, though. I spotted a few tiny tadpoles swimming near my toes and grinned. I carefully cupped my hands and scooped up a handful._

_"Got some!" I shouted triumphantly. _

_"Lemme see!" Daryl insisted, leaning towards me. He looked into my cupped hands and poked at one of the bigger ones. It squirmed, trying to get away. "Let's put 'em in the bucket." He pointed towards a faded blue pail on the side of the creek and I waded over, gently letting the tadpoles go into the foot of water inside the bucket._

_There was suddenly a loud splash and I turned just in time to see Daryl lying on his belly near the muddy bank. I laughed loudly as he stood, mud caking his front from head to toe. This didn't seem to faze him at all. _

_"Damn, saw a frog but I missed 'em." He complained. _

_I wrinkled my nose. "My daddy says that's a bad word."_

_Daryl turned and raised his eyebrows at me. "Damn? No it ain't. Merle says it all the time and he ain't never got in trouble. You should say it. Just once." He grinned mischievously at me. "I won't tell yer' folks."_

_"I don't know, Dar." I said slowly, but already I could feel a small devilish smile forming on my lips._

_"Oh come on, Charlie. Don't be sucha baby!" He teased._

_"Damn." I said quietly. Daryl's grin grew and I let out fit of giggles. "Damn!" I said louder._

_"Damn!" He shouted back, laughing loudly._

_I shouted even louder and soon we were practically screaming at each other through fits of laughter._

_"Well, well, well…what's goin' on down here?" A familiar voice drawled. My smile faded a little as I turned to see Daryl's brother standing on the edge of the bank, hands in his pockets. It was weird they were brothers. They didn't look anything alike. Plus Merle was a lot meaner than Daryl. Probably because he was older. Still, Daryl was older than me by two whole years and he was never really mean. At least to me._

_"Go away, Merle." Daryl muttered._

_"Now is that anyway to talk to your big brother? Especially in front of your little girlfriend?"_

_I felt my cheeks burn red and looked back at Daryl, whose hands had curled up into tight fists._

_"I'm not his girlfriend, loser. We're just best friends." I shot back, placing my hands on my hips._

_Merle chuckled, looking amused. "Best friends. Well ain't that cute. Ya best git' on home, girly. 'Fore yer' folks find out you been meddlin' with them Dixon boys again." He smirked. "Just saw yer' daddy's truck pull up the driveway."_

_I hesitated, glancing over my shoulder at Daryl. He caught my eye and nodded. "I'll see ya tomorrow, Charlie."_

_I gave him a small smile. "Alright then." I gathered up my shoes and socks in my arms and began to climb up the side of the creek bank. My foot suddenly slipped in the mud, but I felt a strong grasp on my arm before I slipped and fell face first into the muck._

_I was surprised for a second to see it was Merle who was safely pulling me up onto the steep bank. "Thanks." I said uncertainly._

_"Wouldn't want ya ruin that purty dress, huh?" He said, once again looking amused._

_"Ya know, you don't always gotta be sucha damn jerk the rest of the time, Merle." With that, I turned my heel and headed back towards the long stretch of field towards my home. Merle's laughter trailed after me. _


	4. Chapter 4

I woke up the next morning in a damp sleeping bag which either meant I had backtracked to childhood and was peeing the bed again, or it was raining. The loud, echoing pitter patter of water on the barn's tin roof was my answer. I groaned, rolling onto my back and forcing my eyes open. Rain trickled down from the small, nickel sized hole over my head and splattered onto my forehead. I grumbled loudly, wiping it off with the edge of my sleeping bag. What good was having a shelter if it meant I still got rained on? I wriggled out of my sleeping bag and tried to ignore the uncomfortable dampness of my clothes. I rolled it up and strapped it to my backpack before shuffling into what looked the one semi-dry area of the loft. I wrapped my arms around my knees, feeling bitter. Couldn't I catch a damn break? Just once?

A sigh escaped my lips as I pondered what to do. Wait for the storm to blow over and then try to find the town, or tough it out in the rain and try to get there sooner? In the back of my mind, I had already made this decision though. The idea of wasting my morning trapped in a tiny, little barn to hide from the storm seemed like hell compared to braving the rain outside in search of food, supplies, and hopefully a more reliable shelter. I was on my feet before I had even finished my last thought. I pulled a sweatshirt out of my pack and quickly pulled it on, tugging the hood over my head. I made a mental note to check this town for a raincoat or a poncho or something. Maybe even an umbrella. An umbrella could double as a pretty badass weapon against the walkers.

After shouldering my pack and carefully climbing down from the loft, I made my exit into the unappealing weather outside. It was like walking into a monsoon. The sky was a dark, mean looking grey and the swirling clouds gave no indication of clearing up anytime soon. Better find that town soon. I had already checked the map when inside so headed in the general direction I had started off in the day before. If I was lucky, the rain would provide some sort of cover against the walkers. Maybe it would make it harder to smell me. Better yet, maybe they would get stuck in all the mud that was getting churned up by the rain drops.

I hummed under my breath as I walked, though I couldn't even tell you what the song was called. Probably some mindless pop song I had heard on the radio, back when the world was sane, and that had been imbedded in my brain for all eternity. God, I missed music. If I had music, I probably could have done without the company of another human being. Music had always been my solace, starting from the time I was a teenager. I carried an i-pod in my pack still, though the battery had run out of juice months ago. I couldn't bear to part with it. It was the one physical memory of my past life that I still carried with me. Other people had grabbed photos, books, diaries…I had grabbed my i-pod, even knowing full well it would be dead within the month. That was what had been important to me to hold onto.

Time passed, either too slow or too fast. I didn't know. It was hard to keep track of how long I had been walking without the sun to guide me. The clouds still shielded it from view, and the rain continued to pour. If I had to guess, I would have said two hours, maybe less. I counted five walkers. Five that I actually had to deal with. The rest I was able to avoid by either speeding up and jogging around them, or ducking behind a tree until they had passed. I was happy to see I had been right about the mud. More than a few of the dead seemed to be having trouble trudging through the swampy areas of the forest floor. It was almost funny to watch them try. They would reach out their bony, decaying arms as I passed and try to grab at me. Maybe I would have even laughed, except that I never forgot this was my reality and these things, these horrifyingly comical corpses stuck in the mud, wanting nothing better than to bite into my flesh. I would suppress a shudder and move on.

I was soaked to the bone by now and shivering. My clothes stuck to my body like an extra pair of skin and I wanted nothing more than to shed them for something dry. Every time I came to what looked like a break in the trees, I hoped as hard as I could that the town would be right there waiting for me. This has happened three times before I had actually emerged from the forest and not into a less dense area of the woods, but the actual end of the forest. In front of me stretched a crumbling country road and not a mile down it sat the small town I had spent the last few days trying to find.

"Finally!" I couldn't suppress the triumphant shout that escaped my lips as joy welled up inside me.

If I was lucky, I'd find food here and some dry clothes. Maybe even a place to hunker down for a few nights. My legs felt heavy and sore, but it was easy to ignore seeing how close the town was. I kept going. I never thought I would see the day when nothing made me more excited than a dry place to sleep and the possibility of finding something to eat besides stale bread and canned ravioli. Maybe they would still have beer here. I would kill for a beer. My pace quickened as the rain began to slow. By the time I had reached the edge of town, it had stopped altogether. I pulled back my hood, letting my long, damp tresses escape.

First things first, I needed a grocery store. A few walkers milled about the streets, but nothing I was too worried about. My mood had heightened and I'd be damned if I let a few dead people get the best of me now. I spotted a corner general store across the street. Something stopped me dead in my tracks, though. My heart sank a little and my happiness began to deflate, like a popped balloon. I heard the sound again and ducked into the doorway of the nearest shop, my eyes scanning the streets and rooftops frantically.

Gunshots.


	5. Chapter 5

**_10 years old_**

_I stood at the end of my driveway, watching as two more fire trucks whooshed past, sirens blazing. Something was going on. Just down the road I could make out the billowing black clouds of smoke. I felt a little jolt in my stomach. I was worried about Daryl. His house was down there._

_I ran back to my house and peeked in the tiny window by the front door. I could see mama in the corner of the living room, sitting in the rocking chair. Gabe slept soundly in her arms and she rubbed his back. He had finally tired himself out from all that screamin' and cryin' earlier. Mama was right about those terrible twos. I couldn't wait for Gabe to be three._

_Satisfied mama would be busy for a while, at least long enough not to miss me, I took off down the driveway and onto the dirt road. I ran as fast as I could in the direction of the smoke. The sick feeling in my stomach only got worse as I got closer. I rounded the next bend in the road and saw what I had been dreading. Three fire trucks, an ambulance, and two police cars sat in the Dixon's driveway. Smoke billowed from one of the bedroom windows, though it looked like the fire had been put out. I scanned the small crowd of people frantically. A bunch of other kids from the neighborhood were there, but I was only interested in finding one person._

_I spotted a familiar sandy brown colored mop of hair. Daryl had his back to me, his bike in the dirt at his feet. A police officer was kneeling in front of me, his hand gripping Daryl's shoulder. I could tell from the look on the cop's face that what he was saying was bad. Daryl ripped himself out of the policeman's grasp and stormed off towards the woods. I hurried after him._

_"Daryl!" I called. If he heard me, he didn't stop. "Daryl, it's me Charlie! Wait!"_

_He still didn't stop. I followed after him until he finally reached the bed of the creek and stopped. He was quiet, but as I got closer I could see his shoulders were shaking. Was Daryl Dixon cryin'? I reached out my hand and tentatively touched his arm. He whirled around, catching me off guard. I stumbled back a few steps, but my eyes found his right away. His blue eyes watered. His face was streaked with tears. _

_I didn't stop to think and just threw my arms around his middle. He was a whole head taller than me, the top of my head grazing his chin. I buried my face into his tee-shirt. "Daryl, what's the matter? What happened?" I asked._

_It seemed forever before he answered me, though his arms wrapped around me and squeezed me back. I could tell he was scared and sad and I wanted nothing more than to just squeeze all those bad feeling out of my friend. I couldn't bear to see him so sad. "My mama…she's…she's dead." He said quietly. "She fell asleep, smokin' a cigarette and…" He couldn't even finish the sentence. My breath had caught in my throat and I felt like I wanted to cry for him. I knew that Daryl had never cared much for either of his folks, but still. It was his mama._

_"I'm so sorry, Dar. I'm so sorry about your mama." I tried to sound comforting. "It'll be okay, though. Somehow, everything will-"_

_Daryl suddenly caught me off, untangling my arms from around his middle and pushing me away from him. He shoved me hard enough to where I stumbled backwards and landed on my bottom in the dirt. I felt my eyes widen with surprise, but was even more surprised to see the look of rage on Daryl's face._

_"It ain't gonna be okay, Charlie! My mama is dead!" He shouted at me, his hands balling into fists. My mouth opened to respond, but nothing came out. Daryl had never yelled at me before. "Ya can't say it'll be alright. Ya gotta mama and daddy who love ya, and a brother. I ain't got anybody! I got a dead mama who never gave a shit about me anyways, a daddy who doesn't care 'bout nothin' other than drinkin' and a shitty brother who left me to go to jail. It ain't gonna be okay!" _

_I made a move to step towards him. "What about me, Daryl? We're best friends, aren't we? You got me." I said quietly._

_Daryl stared at me with a hard, icy glare. "Yer mama and daddy don't even want you to be friends with me. Sooner or later, yer gonna see that I ain't good enough to even be yer friend and you'll forget 'bout me. Just go, Charlie. I don't want ya here, okay? We ain't friends no more."_

_I felt tears welling up in my eyes and my face grew hot. "But, Dar…we are friends. We've always been friends. You don't mean that." I felt a warm tear trail down my cheek._

_"I do, Charlie. Now go on, run home to yer' mama and daddy and the rest of yer' perfect family. I don't need ya to feel bad for me anymore. Go!" He shouted at me. _

_I was full on crying now, but I didn't care. "Fine! But I hate you, Daryl Dixon! I ain't gonna be your best friend ever again!" I shouted back. I saw his hard stare falter and his face fell but I turned my back on him. I was sobbing so hard, I felt like I couldn't breathe. I felt like my chest was just going to cave in on itself and I'd just cry myself dry until I withered away like a flower on a hot day. I hated what I said. I hated Daryl for being so horrible to me, but I hated myself more for what I'd said back. _


	6. Chapter 6

It was hard to tell where the gunshots were coming from, but I knew they were extremely close. Even worse, the sound was beginning to get the walkers all excited. More of them began dragging their feet out in the street, in search of I'm sure what they believed to be their next meal. On top of being seriously concerned about the walkers and the gunshots, I was surprised to feel annoyance stirring somewhere inside me. I had been relying on finding this town. Looks like I would have to try my luck elsewhere.

There was an alleyway to my right and I crawled across the sidewalk until I was safely pressed against the brick wall, a black iron fence partially blocking my view of the street. I glanced over my shoulder to see the alley behind me was clear aside from a chain link fence. I could get away now. One quick hop over the fence and I would be home free before I had to deal with any bullshit. The last thing I needed was to get caught in some sort of survivor vs. survivor crossfire.

I turned to leave when the sound of gunfire grew louder. A pick-up truck screeched to a stop in front of me. I froze and pressed as close to the wall as I could. He had a gun in his hand and was screaming something, though it was hard to understand. I was surprised to hear an answering call from over my head. I looked up to see a shadowy figure of a man perched on the roof.

"Don't leave me!" He yelled. The driver of the pick-up revved the engine, ready to bolt. I looked back at the figure on the roof and let out a gasp as he jumped to the roof of the building next to me. I should have taken my chances then. My brain was hollering at me to get up and run. I didn't, though. I don't know what made me stay, but I didn't move. I just watched as the figure on the roof suddenly slipped and fell. A strangled cry escaped my lips before I could stop myself. I clamped a hand over my mouth, although I doubted anyone could hear me over the continuous gunfire and yelling from the truck.

A boy, not much older than Gabe, was barely a foot away from where I hid. He was screaming in pain. For a second, it looked like he had missed the fence and just hit the dumpster. I leaned forward onto my knees, though, and saw otherwise. One of the horribly sharp spikes on the fence had gone straight through his leg, leaving him utterly helpless. "Oh god, help me! Please!" He cried.

I heard the truck engine rev again and peered around the fence. "I'm sorry, Randall. I'm so sorry man!" The passenger of the truck cried through the window. A second later, the vehicle had shot down the street, zooming away from the town and out of outstretched hands of the walkers that had gathered in the street. I was now aware of the herd that was moving towards the alley, towards the boy's terrified screams. I felt stuck, torn between saving my own ass or helping out this stranger, who clearly needed to be saved.

"God damn it." I muttered to myself. It was almost ironic. Had I not been wishing for weeks for some sort of human contact? Looks like my wish was coming true, though not the least bit in the way I would have liked. I was wary of the walkers, but those could easily be taken care of. I was more worried about the other shooters. Though, I hadn't seen them, I knew the guys in the pick-up truck had to have been exchanging gunfire with someone other than walkers. I had already made up my mind, though.

I pushed myself to my feet, my bat in my hands. I swung at the closest walker. Its skull splattered under the weight of my swing before it dropped to the pavement.

"Holy shit! Please, you gotta get me out of here. They left me here! Oh god, they left me to die!" The boy, Randall, shouted at me.

I turned on him. "I'm going to help you, but I need you to shut up! I know you're in pain, but you're attracting every single walker in a five mile radius!" I hissed at him.

His eyes widened, caught off guard by my tone. The look lasted a second though before replaced once again by one of sheer terror. "Please, don't kill me! I'm not with those guys. I'm just a kid!"

For a second, I thought he was talking to me which didn't make much sense. Then, I noticed his gaze had drifted over my shoulder. I quickly turned to face three men, guns pointed right at my chest.

"Drop the weapon." One of the men grunted. He wore what looked like an old policeman's uniform. The tone in his voice implied this was a line he had used many times in the past.

I knew better than to argue with three loaded weapons and the bat fell from my hand and hit the pavement with a clank. "Don't, please. I don't know this guy. I-I was just passing through and stopped to help him."

"And why should we believe you aren't with those other assholes? Huh?" The cop demanded.

Before I could answer, one of the other men interrupted. He was younger than the other two, with dark hair. He looked Asian. "Hey, I don't mean to break this up, we have to hurry. Rick, these walkers are getting closer!" He sounded nervous.

I peered around the cop and the other older man, who was sporting a head of pure white hair, and saw at least a dozen walkers slowly making their way towards us.

"Maybe we should just put the poor kid out of his misery." The older man suggested.

My eyes widened in shock, but Randall opened his mouth to protest before I could say anything. "No! Please, don't do that. Take me with you! I promise I'll do what you say!" He begged.

"Rick, we can't take them. The others won't like it. We don't know him. What if their people come looking for them, guns blazing?" The Asian protested, shooting a look at Randall and I.

"Whoa, hold on! I'm not with this guy, I don't have any people! And I'm not going anywhere with anyone!" I argued.

The three men shared a look of disbelief before ignoring my comment and getting back to the matter at hand. "We could try to amputate it, right above the knee. Probably wouldn't be too difficult, although he'd be losing a lot of blood." The older gentleman suggested again.

Randall seemed to grow even paler. "What? You're going to take my leg off? What?" He demanded, his voice shaking.

The three ignored him, quickly discussing the best way to go about the amputation. I still was finding it hard to believe I had somehow landed myself in this situation. I look behind the men again to see the walkers closer than ever. We had maybe minutes before they were on us.

"Hey! Look, there's no time. We're all about to be walker lunch. Can't we just yank him off the spike?" I asked desperately.

I was surprised when it appeared my advice was being considered. "She's right. We don't have time. If we hurried through an amputation, we could end up killing him. Let's just try to get him off the spike. Then we can put him in the car and deal with this at the farm." The cop said. The Asian opened his mouth to argue but was given a look that clearly threatened that this was not a negotiation.

"Alight, let's grab hold of his leg. On the count of three, we lift. You, hold his arms still. This will go much better if he's not wriggling around." I realized the cop was speaking to me and I nodded quickly. I pulled myself up onto the dumpster next to the poor kid and pinned his arms down at his side.

"Don't struggle." I ordered him, seeing the panicked look on Randall's face. "Alright, let's do this."

"Wait, wait, wait-" Randall tried to argue, but someone had already said three and his leg was lifted clean off the spike, but not without mangling the skin and muscle of his calf. He let out a painful, horrible scream and I pressed my hand over his mouth.

"Shut up! You're gonna kill us all!" I spat. His eyes were watering with pain and terror, but I waited for him to give me a sign he'd keep his mouth shut. He nodded once and I removed my hand, hopping off the dumpster as the two older men carefully lifted Randall and began to carry him away from the scene.

"Wait, what about her? Do we leave her?" The Asian asked, looking back at me.

I raised my hands in protest. "I already told you, I'm not a part of this! I'll leave now and you'll never see me again!" I shared a pleading look with the cop, who just looked back at me with a hardened gaze.

"We can't take any chances she'll bring those people back to try and find us. We take her too." He ordered.

"What? Are you kidding me?" I argued. The Asian boy tried to grab my arm and I tugged it from his grasp. "Nu uh, I ain't goin nowhere with you people! Not without a damn fight!" He struggled to grab hold of my again, but I pushed him away. I turned to run but not before I saw him raise his hand. Something heavy hit the back of my head.

Then everything was black.


	7. Chapter 7

**_13 Years old_**

_The sun had just begun to set as I raced through the field behind my house, headed for the woods. The sky looked like a watercolor painting, all pinks and oranges. I didn't stop to look too hard, though. I was already running late thanks to mama and daddy. I tried to avoid telling them where I was off to, but daddy stopped me on my way out the backdoor. He said my face look guilty, although I wasn't sure what exactly he meant by that. Needless to say, they finally wheedled out of me that I was having a campfire at Daryl's. I waited to get shot down, wondering how long Daryl would wait for me before he realized I wasn't coming. _

_They left me seated at the kitchen table with Gabe, saying they had to talk about it in the next room. I didn't get why they couldn't just talk about it in front of me, but whatever. I watched as Gabe spooned applesauce into his mouth, although he was getting more on his face than in his actual mouth. I smiled a little, reaching across the table and wiping his chin with a napkin. Gabe grinned and took another spoonful, this time purposely missing his mouth and smearing applesauce all over his cheeks and nose. _

_"Gabe, honey, you're makin' a big mess." I heard my mom sigh as she walked back into the room. _

_I felt impatient. "So? Can I go?" I asked, looking between both my parents._

_My daddy surprised me by nodding. Then, even more surprising, reached into the cabinet over the fridge and handed me a bag of marshmallows. "Have fun, and come home before it gets too late." I didn't wait for them to change their mind, grabbing the mallows from his hand and shouting thank you over my shoulder as I ran out the door. _

_I made it through the small stretch of woods between our houses and came out on the other side. I could see a small fire burning quite a ways behind the house and slowed down to a walking pace. Ever since Daryl's mama had died, my parents had been pretty lax about the amount of time I spent with him. Before, they used to hate the idea of me hanging around "that Dixon boy", as they so fondly liked to call him. Now, though, I think they either felt bad for him or saw that he wasn't any more of a bad influence on me than anyone else was. Either way, it made me happy._

_After that day at the creek, when Daryl first found out about his mama, I had been sure that was the end of us being friends. Even though I had stopped feeling mad at him by the time I had stomped all the way home. I guess Daryl stopped being mad too because the next day he had showed up at my house with a red bucket asking me to help catch some frogs. So I did. We didn't talk about what had happened, but I guess it didn't really matter. We were still friends. That was the important part._

_"I thought you we're never comin'." Daryl greeted me, a grin on his face. "Had to wait for yer mama and daddy to give you permission?" He teased._

_I rolled my eyes. "Well, I'm here, aren't I? And I got these." I raised the bag of marshmallows in my hand only to have them snatched away by Daryl almost instantly. "Hey!"_

_He smirked at me, opening the bag and popping one into his mouth. I made a face at him before plopping down on grass in front of the tiny fire pit. "You know, they taste better if you actually cook 'em." _

_Daryl shrugged, popping another one into his mouth. He offered me the bag and I took one, enjoying the sweet taste and the strange mushy texture. It was quiet for a moment as we watched the sun sink completely and darkness spread over the sky like a blanket. That was the one thing I always liked about living in the country. You could see the stars no matter where you were. There weren't any street lamps, or brightly lit fast food signs for miles. Sometimes, it got so dark, you couldn't even see your own hand in front of your face. I shivered a little, glad I had remembered to bring my flashlight for the walk home._

_"Ya wanna hear a scary story?" Daryl suddenly asked. He had a mischievous glint in his eyes. _

_"Your stories aren't even scary. Unless they're about Merle." I joked. Even Daryl laughed, which made me laugh harder in turn._

_"No, this is a good one, I promise! It's true. I think. I dunno. Merle told it to me."_

_I looked at my friend skeptically. "Alright, if you say so. Go on."_

_Daryl handed me the bag of marshmallows as he dove right into the story. I absentmindedly ate at least another five or six as I listened to him talk. He wasn't wrong. This was one of his better ones. Normally, his scary stories started off good and he ended up making up the ending so by the time he finished, nothing really made sense and it was more funny than scary. I pretended not to be scared, but I think Daryl knew otherwise, judging by the satisfied expression he gave me once he had finished. I didn't say anything for a second before clearing my throat. _

_"That one was alright, I guess." I said, shrugging my shoulders._

_Daryl rolled his eyes. "Yeah, right. Have fun walkin' home through those woods tonight." He smirked._

_I glared at him halfheartedly. "I'll be fine, don't you worry." It was my turn to tell a story then._

_We did this for what felt like hours, until the fire had ebbed away and there was nothing much left besides a few embers. I knew it was about time for me to go home. Pretty soon I'd hear my daddy's voice hollering for me to get back. I tried to pretend I wasn't worried about walking through the woods. I had done it a million times, but I didn't want to admit his first story had freaked me out a little bit. Daryl must have known, though, because when it came time to leave, he walked me all the way home to my backdoor. _


	8. Chapter 8

I was dead. One of those idiots had shot me in the head and I was dead. Although, I had hoped that death wouldn't make my head hurt so much. I groaned and forced my eyes open. On second thought, maybe I wasn't dead because if heaven was an old, dirty shack than I would have some complaints.

Sun peaked in through the cracks in the door. I had no idea what day it was, what time, or how long I had been out. My head was still killing me though from whatever had been used to knock me out, and the concrete floor was beginning to make my ass fall asleep.

"Rise and shine." A voice said.

My eyes shot up and just mere feet away was the boy I had helped save. Randall. He was leaning back against the wall, looking just as miserable as I felt. His hands were behind his back, no doubt tied up. I wriggled my wrists and found that my own hands were bound in a pair of handcuffs. I growled before struggling to right myself into a sitting position.

"Yeah, nice people. Right?" Randall sneered.

I ignored him, although mentally I agreed. I hadn't done anything to these people, yet here I was all locked up like some sort of war prisoner. "How long have we been here?" I croaked out. My voice sounded raw and sore from lack of water. I cleared my throat.

Randall shrugged. "Not long. Maybe a few hours."

"How's your leg?" I asked. I was surprised to see that our captors had took the time to bandage his wound.

"Hurts like hell, but could be worse. Still have a leg at least."

Before I could reply, I heard heavy footsteps approach the shack. There was the sound of a lock being undone before the door swung open. I squinted into the sudden light, making out a tall, burly looking figure. He wasn't one of the men I had met last night. With his shaved head and sever looking jawline, along with this big, bad boots, he looked like he had just stepped out of the military.

He shut the door and crouched down on the floor, shaking a bottle of water in his hand. "Brought you two a present."

My mouth felt like cotton just at the sight of water. The man must have caught the look in my eye because he let out a low, unpleasant chuckle. "Not so fast, little lady. You answer my questions, you get a sip. We don't want any problems now, do we?"

I fought the urge to spit out a sassy remark at him. I knew I wasn't in the best position to be arguing and pissing people off.

"How many in your group?" He asked.

I looked at Randall, waiting for him to answer. "I dunno, maybe 30."

Our prisoner guard looked back at me. "That sound about right to you?"

"I already told your people last night. I don't know this guy. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time." I said quietly.

"Is that so? Boy, you seen this girl before? And you better not lie to me."

Randall looked terrified. I looked at him, trying to catch his eye. He wouldn't look at me and I knew I was about to get thrown under the bus with him. Son of a bitch.

Randall nodded. "Y-yes. She's a part of my group. Somebody's woman."

I growled. That little piece of shit. I had risked my ass to help him, save his life, and this was the thanks I got. I hoped big and burly beat the shit out of him.

"You asshole." I spat out. "I am tellin' the truth here! I've never seen this kid or any of his people before. What don't ya'll understand? Why the hell would I lie about that?" I hissed at him before I could stop myself. "I haven't done a damn thing wrong and you people have me locked up in your barbaric little prison like-"

I didn't finish my sentence. A fist came flying out of nowhere and connected with my jaw. The force of the punch pushed me over backwards and I landed with a grunt on my side. I felt blood trickle down the side of my mouth. I heard yet another sound of fist against flesh and Randall let out a strangled cry. I rolled over onto my side, panting heavily and trying to ignore the intense pain in my jaw.

The burly man had stood up and was wiping his fist on his pant leg. He sneered at Randall and I before twisting the cap off the water bottle. I watched as he poured it all out onto the floor in front of us. Every last drop.

"I'll come back and hopefully, ya'll will be tellin' the same story. The true one." With that, he turned and left, locking us in the shack yet again.

I immediately whirled on Randall. "You sorry piece of shit. Now you're gonna get me killed too!" I cried at him. I shot out my leg and kicked him as hard as I could in his injured calf.

He let out a strangled cry of pain, his eyes watering. "I'm sorry! I didn't know what else to do! He thinks we're both liars!"

"No, you're the damn liar! And I'm gettin' the hell outta here and leavin' you to get your sorry ass handed to you." I growled.

Randall looked up at me, confusion in his eyes. "How the hell you gonna break outta here?"

I pulled my hands out in front of me, showing him my chain free wrists. His eyes widened. "Tell those fuckers they might wanna put the cuffs on a little tighter next time." I smirked. I wiped the blood from my chin. Thank god for having small wrists. The entire time big burly had been running his mouth, I had been squeezing my hands out of my manacles. And now I was getting the hell out of here.

Randall was talking to me, saying something, but I didn't care to listen. He was now on my shit list. I knew the door was locked and my eyes combed our prison for another exit. There was a small loft space just over our heads. It was worth a shot. I got to my feet and used an overturned bucket in the corner as stepping stool, pulling myself up into the loft. 'Jackpot.' I thought. There was a small, square looking window, most likely for pushing hay bales out of, but definitely big enough for me to squeeze through.

I crawled on my belly over to it and gazed out. The tree line wasn't far ahead. If I was quick, I could make it. I glanced over my shoulder, Randall still yelling.

"I swear to God, if you leave me here, I'll scream. I'll get that asshole to come back here and get you!" I caught the last piece of his rant. I rolled my eyes, turning and lowering my legs out of the window first. I held onto the ledge with both hands until I was dangling over the side. I closed my eyes and let go. It was a short drop and I only lost my balance for a moment before I was off and running.


	9. Chapter 9

**_15 years old_**

_My eyes shot open as the shrill sound of the school bell rang in my ears. Everyone else had already raced towards the door, leaving me behind as I groggily tried to gather my books into my backpack. I didn't even remember falling asleep, though I did remember feeling tired as hell. Now I felt even more tired, if that was possible. I stifled a yawn as I shouldered my bag and headed towards the door._

_"Miss Asher…" A voice stalled me. _

_I stopped in my tracks and let out a sigh before turning to face my History teacher, Mr. Shudy. "I know, I'm sorry. It won't happen again." I said before he had a chance to say anything._

_He raised his eyebrows in amusement. "Out late last night with Mr. Dixon? You know, he's not exactly the-"_

_"No. Actually. I wasn't." I said coolly. I didn't give him a chance to make another comment. Instead I turned my back and left the room. Daryl was leaning against the wall next to the classroom, waiting for me. I grinned at him as he fell into step with me._

_"Did I get you in trouble?" He asked, smirking slightly._

_I rolled my eyes. "Not any more than usual. Did you hear that?" I asked curiously. _

_He shrugged his shoulders, pushing open the glass door and walking into the bright sunshine. He held the door as I followed after him before letting it swing shut behind us. "Just heard somethin' about a Mr. Dixon and assumed he meant me. Suppose he could've been talkin' 'bout Merle. You been spendin' alotta late nights with my big brother, Charlie?" He teased perking a single eyebrow._

_I punched him hard in the shoulder and he let out a laugh. "That's not even funny. That's just gross." I said, wrinkling my nose in disgust. _

_"Yeah, I'd be grossed out too if that was goin' on." He grinned. "Wanna ride home?"_

_I nodded, following him in the direction of his truck. "Sounds good to me." I tossed my backpack into the bed of the truck and made to pull open the passenger side door when Daryl was suddenly there, leaning against the door. He was looking at me thoughtfully, a small, mischievous smile on his lips. "What?" I asked suspiciously._

_He held out the keys to me. "You drive."_

_I felt my eyes grow wide. "Are you kidding? I'm not even sixteen yet!" I exclaimed. _

_Daryl shrugged again and pressed the keys into my hand. "So? I ain't twenty-one and I still drink. Don't be a wimp. Git' in the truck." He opened the door and swung himself up into the passenger seat. I jumped back as he slammed the door and smirked at me from behind the window._

_I looked down at the keys in my hand and felt a knot form in my stomach. Daryl knew I didn't know how to drive. I also knew there was no point in arguing with someone like him, though. I trudged around the front of the truck and climbed into the driver's seat. I looked at the smug looking boy seated next to me. "You know I've never driven a car before. You tryin' to get us both killed?" I asked._

_He rolled his eyes. "Don't be a wimp." He repeated. "It ain't hard, any moron can drive a car. Now put the keys in the ignition." I followed his instructions and started the engine. "Now just put it in drive and hit the gas."_

_I narrowed my eyes at him. "I know that much. I'm not a complete idiot." I huffed. I didn't tell him that I felt like I might throw up for some reason. Not only was this my first time driving, but if we got pulled over, we'd both be screwed. Even worse, my daddy would kill me. I didn't voice any of that, though. I just put the truck in gear and went. I pressed the gas too quick and we jerked forward before I slammed on the breaks. I could see Daryl shaking with silent laughter in the seat next to me, but I ignored him and hoped he realized it wasn't smart to make fun of the person behind the wheel. Jerk._

_ I tried again, this time deciding to press my foot down a little more slowly. It seemed to work better and pretty soon we were actually out of the parking lot and onto the main road. My knuckles were white from how hard I was gripping the wheel. _

_"See? Easy." Daryl said, breaking the silence._

_I felt a small smile tug at the corners of my lips. "It's kinda fun." I admitted. _

_Daryl chuckled. "Now just don't kill us."_

_I rolled my eyes, but didn't say anything. The drive home was easy and I felt my paranoia slowly ebbing away until all I felt was the excitement that I was actually driving a car by myself. Daryl didn't say much, just giving me little pointers here and there. I nodded and listened and even felt a little disappointed when I pulled onto our familiar dirt road and saw my driveway looming ahead. Daryl seemed to notice._

_"Why don't ya keep on goin' for a lil' while. Git' some practice. Unless yer' still too scared." He said. I could hear the amusement in his tone._

_"Yeah, right. You better watch your mouth before I "accidentally" side swipe the next mailbox we pass." I shot back. I snuck a look at Daryl and saw that all too familiar smirk on his lips._

_"Shut up and keep yer' eyes on the road."_

_I felt my grin grow as I passed my house and continued on down the country road, the truck stirring up dust as I pressed on the petal just a little bit harder._


	10. Chapter 10

Randall's shouts faded away quickly as I put more and more space between myself and the old shack that had been my prison, and hopefully would never be again. I was sure his yelling had caught someone's attention by now, but I had already reached the forest and was weeding my way in and out of trees. I realized I didn't have my pack or any of my weapons, but I would deal with that later. I'd rather be out here, running for my life and unprepared then trapped in that shack with an asshole, wondering how much longer I was going to be kept alive.

I didn't stop running. Not even when I stumbled upon walkers. I didn't want to waste my time or energy dealing with them. Plus, it would have been more trouble than it was worth to find a way to kill one without my bat or my knife. They weren't my biggest problem for once, which was weird to think about. Things had gotten sort of backwards for me. For the past couple of months, there had been this hope buried inside of me that I would stumble across more survivors and that I finally would be able to have actual conversations instead of keeping my voice intact by singing to myself all the time. So it felt just a tad ironic that I was currently running from the only humans I had seen and spoken to in what felt like forever. I didn't think too hard about it, though. Considering that they had felt it was okay to lock me up like a wild animal, I didn't feel too sad about leaving them behind.

I ran until my breath became ragged and there were stitches in my side. Only then did I stop. I slumped against the nearest tree, trying to catch my breath. It was then that I was hit with the realization that I also didn't have any food or water. That was a huge problem. "Shit." I groaned. I slammed my fist against the tree in frustration, which resulted in nothing more than bruised and bleeding knuckles. I knew I was in a bad situation and I felt panic beginning to jumble my insides. I forced it down, though, taking a deep breath. I sat down at the base of the tree to contemplate my options.

Well, there always the sun. I could use that to determine my direction. That wasn't all that helpful, though, considering I had no idea where I was and what way to hike. I racked my brain harder. I could just wander aimlessly until I miraculously stumbled across a creek or a river, and then I could follow it in the hopes that it would lead me to a town or something. I realized this was an even worse idea than the first one. I kicked myself mentally. I was better than this. I had lasted months all by myself. I sure as hell could get myself of this mess. I took a few more moments to gather my thoughts before finally coming to a decision. It wasn't the best idea, but it definitely was far from the worst.

I had decided, first things first, to find the tallest tree I could, climb to the top, and see if I could spot anything worthwhile. Like I said, it was a start. I moved quietly through the forest, glancing at the height of each and every tree. They were all pretty tall, but my main concern was finding one that I would be able to climb. I finally did, though. It had a low enough branch where I was able to pull myself up. After that, it was easy work climbing slowly from branch to branch. As I got higher and the tree limbs became thinner, I carefully tested each branch with my weight. I got about as high as I could and held onto the trunk and I stood to my feet to look out over the leaves.

I could clearly make out the area I had just come from a ways back and turned instead to look elsewhere. There wasn't much to see, but the highway was clearly visible in the distance as it snaked through the landscape. I decided that was my best bet. Once I found the highway, it would be easier to navigate myself elsewhere. Plus, I could ransack the abandoned cars for more supplies. Satisfied with this discovery, I slowly began the climb down. Once I got close to the bottom, though, I was faced with yet another problem.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." I hissed to myself.

A group of about five or six walkers had gathered at the base of the tree, no doubt drawn here by the sounds I had made climbing, rustling the leaves and causing the limbs to creek. Maybe my smell, too. They were like sharks when it came to sniffing out human meat. I sorted through my brain, trying to come up with any sort of options. Nothing. I was worn out both mentally and physically. I didn't want to deal with this right now, not any of it. I would wait it out for a few hours. Maybe they would get bored and leave, though I seriously doubted it. Boredom didn't seem to be on the list of appropriate zombie emotions.

I climbed back up a little ways and settled myself onto what seemed the sturdies and thickest branch. I cradled myself back against the trunk, hoping for dear life I didn't fall to my death. Then I waited.

There was no real good way to pass the time. I had nothing to do but literally sit there and come up with pointless option after pointless option for my escape. After what felt like an eternity of waiting, which was no doubt only a few hours, I decided my best bet was to wait a little while longer and if they hadn't gone then, jump from one of the lower branches and run. Maybe pick up a fallen branch and bludgeon them to death with that. The chances of this plan getting me killed were very high, but I was willing to take my chances than spend the rest of my life sitting in a tree. The day began to get very warm and I felt myself dozing off. I kept waking suddenly, though, as I felt myself falling sidewise out of my tree. It seemed I finally did manage to safely fall asleep, though, because when I woke up next the sun was beginning to set. Unfortunately, the walkers were still waiting for me.

I stretched my arms out in front of me, wriggling my fingers before doing the same with my legs, making sure nothing was cramped up. Once I had decided my body was as ready as it would ever be, I decided it was time to put my plan into action. I once again began to descend from the tree, searching for a good place to jump that was not too high and not too close to any of the walkers. I was in the midst of this decision when all of the sudden, one of the walkers crumpled to the forest floor. I stared at in shock. 'What the hell?' I thought to myself. Did it just have some sort of fit? A brain malfunction? Another one went down. I squinted my eyes, trying to look closer and that's when I saw the real reason. An arrow was sticking out of its head.

I felt happiness welling up inside of me as each walker went down and part of my problem was taken care of. That happiness quickly ebbed away though as I remembered there had to be someone shooting those arrows and that could be either good or bad. There was either some good Samaritan wandering around the forest saving girls stuck in trees, or my captors had sent someone after me. I had a feeling it was the latter. I tried to think of a way out of this new predicament, but I found I couldn't. I had spent all day thinking and devising crazy plans to save my own ass, and with this new obstacle thrown in, I had no idea what to do. The best I could come up with was to just jump now, run, and hope I didn't get an arrow in the ass. Before I could prepare myself for the jump, though, a voice startled me.

"You gonna git' down yourself, or do I gotta shoot you outta that tree?" A voice drawled. I couldn't see where it was coming from though, as I quickly scanned the area.

"I don't really like either of those options actually." I answered, more for myself than for whoever this stranger was. I struggled myself into a crouching position, calculating my chances for a getaway.

An arrow suddenly shot into the trunk, missing my head by inches. I let out a startled cry and suddenly felt myself falling backwards out of the tree. I hit a few limbs on the way down, but thankfully I wasn't high enough up to cause any serious damage. I still hurt when I hit the ground, though, my head smacking hard into the packed in dirt. I groaned, lying on my back and looking up at the tree. I didn't even have a chance to get up before there was a knee on my chest and an arrow pointed at my head.

"Jesus Christ, I just fell out of a damn tree! Do you think I'm really goin' anywhere?" I asked, struggling to fight the headache that was threatening to form. I couldn't make out the face of my captor behind his huge crossbow, but I didn't really care anymore. At this point, I knew I was done. Suddenly, though, he faltered. The pressure on my chest let up a little bit, although he kept his knee there to prevent me from sitting up.

"Holy shit." He muttered quietly. "Charlie?"

I froze. My name, he knew my name. I felt my heart speed up in my chest as the man lowered his weapon completely and I found myself staring into a pair of all too familiar blue eyes. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out for a second as I struggled to piece together what was happening. We just stared at each other. Finally, though, I found my voice.

"Daryl fucking Dixon." The words were barely above a whisper. "Holy shit is right."


	11. Chapter 11

**_16 years old_**

_I wriggled my toes, tilting my head slightly as I admired my handiwork. My toe nails were now a perfect shade of bright, baby blue. I twisted the lid back onto the nail polish bottle, wrinkling my nose at the strong, unpleasant odor. _

_"Now what?" I asked out loud. It was a Saturday night and I was stuck at home. My parents had split a few hours ago to go on their monthly date night and I was put on baby brother control. It wasn't a complicated task. Pop in a Power Rangers video and the kid was out like a light. Which left an entire night filled with boring, meaningless tasks that I didn't really care too much for anyways. Like painting my nails. _

_I jumped as the phone suddenly began ringing shrilly. "Jesus Christ." I mumbled, placing a hand over my rapidly beating heart. I answered before the second ring ended, hoping it hadn't woken Gabe. "Hello?" I asked._

_"HEY!" A cheerful female voice shouted. _

_"Oh hey, Abby." I replied calmly, leaning back in my desk chair. I twisted the phone cord around my free hand. "What's up?"_

_"Headin' to a party. Can you sneak out?" My bubbly friend asked. I rolled my eyes._

_"And leave my nine year old brother here alone? Uh, no."_

_"Oh come on! He'll be fine! I'm guessing he's already asleep. Just come out for a little while and get home before your parents do. Gabe won't even know you left. Pleeeaaaseee!" She begged me. I could hear other voices in the background, laughing and joking. _

_I sighed, shaking my head. "Abby, I can't. Maybe next weekend." I repeated. Like hell I would leave Gabe here alone. And anyways, I didn't feel interested in hanging around with my usual crowd of friends tonight. In fact, I was starting to feel that way more and more lately. Abby continued to protest, chattering away on the other end. I half listened, knowing there really wasn't anything she could say or do to convince me to leave my house._

_'Tap, tap, tap'_

_I froze, a soft knocking sound coming from the bedroom window behind me. I swiveled in my chair, and my gaze locked onto the person standing outside the panes of glass. "Hey," I interrupted Abby, keeping my eyes on the figure. "I gotta go, I'll just see you on Monday." I didn't hear anything else she said as I hung the receiver up. I crossed the room and unlocked the window, pushing it up. I stood back as he hoisted himself up onto the ledge and crawled inside. I shut and locked the window behind him. "Everything okay?" I asked._

_I knew everything wasn't, though. There was only one reason Daryl showed up at my window in the middle of the night asking to crash on my floor, and that was to avoid his daddy. We didn't talk about it. It was just this unspoken agreement between the two of us. I think a part of me was afraid to know how bad it was, and Daryl just didn't want to admit he was afraid to sleep in his own house when his daddy came home in a worse than usual drunken rage. Because that's who Daryl was. He was tough, and I was the only person allowed to see him in what he considered to be his weakest moments._

_Daryl didn't answer my question, just sat down on the edge of my bed, resting his back against the wall. The desk lamp was dull, but I could still make out the dark colors on his cheek bone, and the red smear on his chin. "Holy shit." I said quietly. I sat down next to him and took his face in my hands. He winced a little, but I was surprised when he let me touch him. "It's getting worse, isn't it?" I asked._

_Daryl just nodded, wiping the blood from his lip with the sleeve of his jacket._

_I felt my heart drop as I studied his busted lip and the green and blue colored bruise forming underneath his eye. Daryl had hinted that the abuse was more than just verbal, but I had never actually seen on signs of it. At least until now. "Don't move." I instructed him._

_I disappeared into the hallway, checked to make sure Gabe was still fast asleep, before grabbing an ice pack from the kitchen freezer. I dampened a cloth from the bathroom and slipped back into my bedroom, shutting the door and twisting the lock just in case. I handed Daryl the ice pack and he pressed it against his cheek, shutting his eyes. I used to rag to wipe off the remaining blood on his lip and chin. I wanted to say something, but what? What was I supposed to say? Nothing I did or said would make this go away, and I knew Daryl wouldn't do anything about it either. It broke my heart._

_"I gotta git outta' there, Charlie." He finally said quietly, opening his eyes to look at me. I sat next to him, hugging one of my pillows close to my chest. "I dunno where I'll go, but I can't be there no more. One of these days, we're gonna end up killin' each other."_

_"I wish I could do somethin', Dar." I answered with a sigh._

_"You are doin' somethin'. Ya don't halfta lemme in every time I show up at yer' window. But ya do. That's doin' somethin'."_

_I gave him a small smile. It got quiet after that, but I didn't mind. Daryl slumped back down onto my pillows, his eyes closing. Normally I made him sleep on the floor, but I couldn't tonight. Not with him in this state. I pulled a blanket over him before curling myself up in the small space left next to him. His breathing got slower and deeper and I knew he had fallen asleep. I watched him for a short moment, wishing again there was more I could do. Wishing that I was bigger or stronger so I could protect him. _

_I couldn't, though. I just had to hope that Daryl meant what he had said. That despite everything else we had been through, that just me being here for him…. was enough._


	12. Chapter 12

I was wondering how hard I had hit my head, because there was no chance in hell that Daryl Dixon was actually right here in front of me. What were the chances? I felt a dull ache forming in the back of my head, which convinced me that I was awake and this was real life. Daryl suddenly stood up, removing his weight from my chest. I struggled into a sitting position, trying to ignore the pain in my head. Our eyes met again as I looked up at him. He hung back a few paces, crossbow clutched in his arms though not as tightly. The look on his face told me he was feeling just as shocked by this as I felt.

"What the hell ya doin' here, Charlie?" The silence was finally broken. My eyes raked over him, taking in every single familiar detail. He looked almost the same as I remembered. He had the same lean, lithe build. The same sandy colored hair, though it was longer than I had ever seen it, the ends curling over the collar of his battered looking shirt. Facial hair had sprouted over his chin and upper lip, though it was barely noticeable. He was dirty and rugged looking. More so than I remembered, but that was to be expected. I could only imagine what I looked like right now, wearing the same tattered clothing I had been for weeks and my hair a tangled knot on my head. It was a miracle he had even recognized me under all this hell.

"What am I doing?" I repeated incredulously. "What the hell does it look like I'm doing? Taking a leisurely stroll through the forest? Did those assholes send you after me? Jesus Christ, Daryl. What the hell are YOU doing? You tried to shoot me!" The words all left my mouth in a jumble, my voice shaking slightly. I felt like the shock of seeing Daryl here, after all this time, had suddenly rendered my brain numb. I didn't know what I was supposed to do, what I was supposed to say. How was this even happening?

"I didn't know it was you. How could I know?" He said in a quiet, gruff tone. "Hell, I didn't think I'd ever see you again."

I stared at him quietly, his words sinking in. Truth be told, I had thought the same. After what had happened the last time I had stood in front of Daryl Dixon, I wasn't sure I wanted to see him again. Even the end of the world couldn't erase what had been said that night. I swallowed hard. He was practically a stranger now. I didn't know him anymore. I didn't know if I could trust him, despite everything we had been through together as kids. Most of all, I didn't know that looking at him again would hurt like this. He was like a living, breathing reminder of home, of the life that I used to have. A reminder that before all this shit, there had been a different world. I tried to push myself into a standing position and found myself once again facing down a crossbow. My eye traveled up over the tense muscles in his arms to the dangerous expression on Daryl's face. It was one I had never seen before and one that seemed to prove that despite our past together, things were different now.

"I gotta take you back with me."

I stared at him incredulously. "Excuse me? First of all, get that arrow out of my face." I said, placing a hand on the crossbow and pushing it down. "Second of all, your buddies kidnapped me, threw me in a shack, and then decided it was necessary to punch me in the face!" I hissed, pointing at my busted lip. It was still tender from earlier and I knew it probably looked worse than it felt.

Daryl's gaze slid to my bruised face and his expression was unreadable for a moment before the hard, stony look was back in his eyes. "I'm not 'bout to let ya go runnin' off to yer group and leadin 'em here. We got 'nough problems."

I felt rage welling up inside of me. "I already told that other asshole that I wasn't a part of any group. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time." I said through gritted teeth. "You have to believe me. That other kid they locked up with me, I'd never seen him before yesterday. Please, Daryl." I couldn't keep the slight begging tone out of my voice. I was pretty much screwed if he didn't believe me.

He chewed on his lower lip, his eyes boring into me. I shifted uncomfortably under his intense gaze. "You really been alone all this time?" He asked finally, after what felt like a life time of silence.

I felt relief washing over me. He believed me. "Yes. Well, not the whole time." I quickly corrected myself. I had been with Gabe for the first month. I shook the thoughts of my younger brother away quickly before the painful memories of what had happened could resurface completely. "But I've been alone for a few months now."

Daryl rubbed the back of his neck. "Damn, woman. I'm surprised yer even alive right now."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "What? You think I can't survive on my own?"

He perked an eyebrow. "Bein' a city girl and all now-"

I cut him off before he had the chance to finish. "Don't even start that shit right now. Are you serious? With everything else that's happened, with what's happening right now, you're gonna bring that old argument up?" I said harshly.

He glared at me and I could tell from his expression that he would have gladly kept arguing had this been a different time and a different place. He seemed to realize that I was right, though, that this was better left for later. I waited, but he didn't say anything for a long minute. "I believe ya. You always were a shitty liar." He finally said. I was slightly irritated, but my relief outweighed that by a ton. "I still gotta take you back with me…if I show up without you, they'll just keep lookin'. They think you're a danger, Charlie, and next time you might not get so lucky and it might not be me who finds ya first." He said gruffly, his eyes moving towards my battered lip and I knew he was thinking about the asshole who had punched me. I opened my mouth to argue, but Daryl waved his hand to silence me. "And anyways, you wouldn't last a week out here. You ain't got any supplies, any weapons. If the walkers didn't git ya first, then you'd starve to death. If I let you go, I'll be wastin' all my damn time worryin' 'bout yer ass."

"You'd be fine. You spent the last ten years not worrying about me, didn't you? Why stop now." I said coldly before I could stop myself. Daryl's face darkened and he moved closer, almost entirely closing the space between us. I fought the urge to step back.

"Like you said, this ain't the time for that bullshit. We got company comin'." He said in a harsh voice, nodding in the direction behind me. I glanced over my shoulder and saw two walkers coming towards us. When I looked back, Daryl met my gaze with a hard expression.

"You comin', or do I gotta drag you behind me?"

I crossed my arms over my chest, pondering my other options. Unfortunately, there weren't any. "If I come with you, you have to promise you won't let them tie me up in that shack again. That I'll be treated like a human being."

Daryl's strong, unwavering gaze met mine. "I promise."

I took a deep breath and nodded once. "Let's go then. Before I change my mind and run away."

Daryl rolled his eyes. "You wouldn't make it five feet before I put an arrow in that skinny, little ass of yours." He said. "Now git' movin', woman. I ain't got all day." I raised my eyebrows slightly, but didn't say a thing. It was nice to know some things still hadn't changed. Things like Daryl Dixon.


	13. Chapter 13

_**18 years old**_

_I made way up the familiar gravel driveway, shivering slightly as a light breeze swept past, rustling the grass softly. Georgia days were unbearably hot, but damn, the night sure did get cold. I heard the loud, raucous laughter of the two men before I saw them. I could tell just by the sound that they had been drinking. _

_A beaten down looking pickup truck came into view and through the darkness I recognized the two Dixon boys. Or rather men now. Daryl was perched on the end of the open tailgate, legs dangling off the ground. Next to him, leaning lazily against the side of the truck with a beer in hand, was his much more obnoxious and colorful brother Merle. For some reason, Merle had taken a shining to me over the years. However, that still didn't stop him from being as inappropriate as possible._

_"Fancy seein' you here, sugar tits!" Merle hollered as he caught sight of me._

_I rolled my eyes, stopping a few feet from the truck. "Well, Merle, seeing as I'm your neighbor and I live five seconds down the road, is it really that much of a shocker?"_

_Merle ignored me, taking a long swig from his beer bottle. Both of the men reeked of alcohol. I wrinkled my nose at the stench._

_"And what do us humble rednecks owe the pleasure of yer' company for, princess?" Merle asked, after letting out an extremely loud and rather disgusting belch, which I had pretended I didn't hear. Daryl had been quiet throughout this entire exchange, but I could feel his eyes on me. I finally turned to look at him._

_I let out a sigh. "I came to say goodbye to Daryl, actually, but since you're lucky enough to be here too, I guess I'll say it to the both of you."_

_Merle opened his mouth, no doubt to make some sort of sexist, unnecessary retort, but was cut off by Daryl. "Where ya' goin'?" He asked quietly. His eyes met mine and I was reminded again of how nice and blue they were. _

_I smiled sadly. "I graduated, remember? I'm leaving for school tomorrow. In Atlanta."_

_Merle let out a hoot. "Wooo-eeee! Well, look out! Our backwoods little princess is ready to take on the big city!"_

_I felt a grin tugging at the corners of my lips as I looked back at Merle. He was grinning drunkenly back, although I couldn't say the same about Daryl. He didn't look to happy for me. Merle also seemed to sense this._

_"Ya'll gonna have to 'scuse me. I ain't about to let you two lovebirds kill this helluva good buzz." He downed the last of the bottle and tossed it carelessly into the back of the truck before heading towards the dark house. "Have fun in the big city, girly! Dun' forget 'bout us small town hicks!" He hollered over his shoulder._

_I ignored him, shaking my head. Daryl had hopped down from the tailgate and was pacing in front of me, running a hand through his hair. I could tell he was agitated, though I wasn't sure why. I reached out and placed a hand on his arm, pulling him to a standstill. "Daryl?"_

_It was a minute before he said anything. "So that's it, huh? You just leavin'?" He asked._

_My heart wrenched in my chest. "Not forever. I'll come back for Christmas, and for summer break. This isn't good-bye forever, Dar. Just for a little while." His arm muscles felt tense under my grip and I slowly let my hand fall back to my side. He wouldn't even look at me now. "Say somethin', Daryl. I thought you'd be happy for me. You know how much I've always wanted to go to college."_

_Daryl leaned back against the truck. His beer bottle tilted and fell to the pavement. I watched as the last of the dark liquid drained onto the gravel. "Go ahead. Go. We both know you think yer to good for this town anyways."_

_"What? Where the hell did that come from? You know damn well I don't think that." I shot back at him. I couldn't hide the surprise that had also welled up in my angry tone. There was only one other time, years ago, that Daryl had talked to me like this. It had been eight years ago when his mama passed away. I remembered like it was yesterday. Daryl had been so angry that he had taken it out on me, and even after that, I was his friend. I had always been his friend. So why this?_

_"Really, Charlie? Am I that wrong? All this time, I bet you couldn't wait to git' outta this dirty, little town and away from yer redneck friend, Daryl. You've always been ashamed to by me friend and this just proves it!"_

_All I felt was utter disbelief and anger as I looked at him. I could tell from the glazed look in his eyes that he was drunk, but that didn't matter. It shouldn't have mattered. "You shut your mouth, Daryl. You're an idiot if you think that. All these years, I've been your friend when no one else wanted to be. I stuck by your side through everything. Through your mama dying, to Merle going away, to you droppin' out of school. Yeah, you know what, my friends hated that I hung around you. They didn't get it, but I didn't give a crap! I have always been your friend!" I was yelling by now and I didn't care. "But now, I don't know why I even bothered…" I trailed off. I felt my hands curl into tight fists as we glared at each other. "You know, I thought you would be happy for me. Even proud of me. Now I can see that you're just jealous." I spat._

_Daryl forced a laugh. "You think I'm jealous of you? What, I'm jealous of your pointless little dreams of college, of somethin' better out there? There ain't nothin' out there for you, or me. But go on, just go. Leave me here like I don't even matter. See if I give a damn." _

_Then it clicked and I realized what this was. Daryl was mad because I was leaving. Because in his mind, everyone was always leaving. "Daryl," I tried one last time, reaching out to grab his hand. He pulled away though and all my gesture did was earn me a glare. "This is how you want to leave things? This is really how you want them to be? You're drunk." I said quietly._

_He shook his head. "Don't matter. Everythin' I said, I meant. You know, I think all this time you were my friend because you felt bad for me. That what it was, wasn't it?"_

_And that was it. Suddenly, it felt broken. Only this time, I knew there was no fixing it. "Yes, Daryl. That's exactly it." I said quietly. With that, I turned on my heel to leave._

_"That's right, Charlie! Walk away, run as far away from me as you can get. Just like you always wanted!" He yelled after me._

_"Go to hell, Dixon!" I hollered over my shoulder. I felt hot tears forming behind my eyes but I refused to cry. I would not cry about this. I kicked angrily at a rock in my path and sent it spiraling into the nearest ditch. The conversation replayed over and over in my mind. It was the last one I would ever have with him. I was done being a part of Daryl Dixon's life. If he didn't want me in it, then I was gone. I took a deep, shaky breath as I turned up my driveway. From here on out, I wouldn't look back_


	14. Chapter 14

I walked a few paces in front of Daryl and I knew this was so he could keep an eye on me. I had given him my word that I wouldn't try and make a break for it, but apparently that wasn't good enough. The silence between us was almost uncomfortable, the only sounds coming from our boots as they crunched on twigs and other forest debris. I wanted to say something, but every time I tried to open my mouth, the words wouldn't come. I threw a quick glance over my shoulder towards Daryl. Our eyes met and I quickly looked away again.

"You got somethin' you wanna say?" His voice drawled.

I shrugged my shoulders but kept my eyes in front of me. "Not sure yet."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I don't know what to say to you." I answered, releasing an irritated sigh. I climbed over a fallen tree trunk and hopped down onto the other side. I wiped my hands on my jeans, watching Daryl effortlessly step up onto the trunk and drop down next to me.

"How long you been alone?" He asked suddenly. He fell into step next to me, crossbow in hand as he surveyed our surroundings. I noticed he was always tense and alert, never letting his guard down even for half a second.

I hesitated, trying to calculate in my head just how much time had passed. "Two months, maybe three. I don't know for sure." I finally answered. I had stopped keeping track of time a while ago. With nowhere to be and nothing to do, what was the point? "How long you been with these…people." I struggled to find an appropriate word to call my kidnappers. My first choice had been 'assholes', but I didn't think that'd go over with Daryl very well.

"Pretty much since the beginning. Met up with 'em just outside Atlanta. They're good people, Charlie." He said, giving me a look. Before I could voice my doubt, he suddenly stopped and thrust his arm out in front of me, forcing me to a halt. "Walker." He said, his voice barely above a whisper. Sure enough, a walker meandered through the bushes a few yards in front of us, though not yet aware of our presence. Daryl held up his crossbow and a second later the walker was on the ground, an arrow embedded in its rotting skull. "Stay here." He said before jogging over to the fallen geek and tugging the arrow from his victim. I watched as Daryl wiped the head of the arrow on the walker's shirt. I wondered when he had gotten so good with a crossbow. He was pretty lousy the last time I had seen him use one, but then again that had been almost two decades ago. I smirked a little, remembering being twelve years old and Daryl giving me a turn with his newest "toy". I had almost shot an arrow through his foot struggling just to lift the damn thing. My memory was disrupted when a decaying hand suddenly curled itself around my jacket.

I let out a terrified yelp as I tried to fight off the zombie that had snuck up on me so quickly. It smelled like rotting flesh and dirt, growling and snarling as it tried to take a bite out of me. I wriggled out of my jacket and fell to the ground where I scrambled away on all fours. I needed a weapon, a branch, a twig, anything was better than nothing. Another cry escaped my lips as the walker suddenly collapsed to the forest floor next to me. I wasn't as surprised to see an arrow sticking out of its forehead. I fell back against the nearest tree trunk, placing a hand over my racing heart. It felt like it might explode out of my chest.

I didn't have much time to recover before Daryl was hauling me to my feet and pushing me up against the trunk. "You bit?!" He demanded, his eyes scanning my body for any signs of blood or a wound. He spun me around and checked the back of me.

"No, god damn it! I'm fine! Maybe you could actually give me a second to answer instead of getting all grabby!" I turned back around and placed my hands on his chest, shoving him backwards. "I'm fine, alright?"

He glared at me. "Well maybe you could pay more attention next time. I ain't gonna waste all my time savin' your ass."

I returned his glare with one that I hoped looked as annoyed as I felt. "Yeah, sorry about that. Hopefully next time it'll just kill me. Save you a whole lot of trouble then, huh?" I whirled around and began stalking off through the trees, pausing to grab my jacket though it looked unsalvageable. "Just get me the hell out of here!" I yelled back to him.

In a second, he had reached my side though not a word was said. It seemed we were both to furious to say a thing, which was fine by me. We walked in silence for a while longer before I could make out an end to the thick trees. As we broke into the clearing, a white farmhouse stood in the distance. I hadn't seen it earlier when I had made my escape, not bothering to glance behind me as I ran. My stomach suddenly felt like it was turning itself into one giant knot. I had no idea what would happen once we got to that farmhouse. I didn't know if Daryl would keep his word, or if he would let them tie me up and throw me back into that shack to rot. I didn't know what these people were really like.

There was an RV parked on the edge of the farm and someone was perched on top, no doubt keeping watch. They must have spotted us coming, though, because the next second they had jumped down and I heard the distant yelling. Daryl's hand curled around my upper arm as he led me closer to the house. I made to tug away but his grip tightened. "Don't. Stay close and let me do the talkin'. I know you, they don't." He said quietly.

While I still felt angry with him for what had happened earlier, I didn't argue. I was outnumbered as it was and I was also looking like the bad guy. I swallowed hard as I noticed the small gathering of people in front of the house. In the yard, just off the side, a small camp was set up. There were a few tents here and there, and what looked like a fire pit in the center. When I looked back at the group waiting in front of the house, I noticed all eyes were on me. I looked down at my shoes and tried to make myself seem as nonthreatening as possible. We finally slowed to a stop.

"It's getting' dark, we were starting to worry about you out there." An unfamiliar male voice said. "See you found her, though."

Daryl cleared his throat. "Yeah, I did. Everyone, this is Charlie." He trailed off for a moment before continuing. It was quiet and I raised my eyes slowly. I had never felt so uncomfortable and out of place in my life as every pair of eyes lingered on my heated face. "She and I…we go way back. Don't we, Charlie?"

I forced myself to nod. "Uh huh." It was the only sound I could manage to force out. My eyes slid from unfamiliar face to unfamiliar face, though they all wore the same expression. An expression I would have described as 'what the hell is happening'. I sure hoped Daryl knew what he had gotten me into.


	15. Chapter 15

**_20 Years Old_**

_I stared at the cell phone on my desk, as if I could somehow convince myself that it would ring if I just stared hard and long enough. A dull hum came from the television in the corner, turned down so low I couldn't make out what was even on. Outside my dorm room window I could hear traffic racing past. My phone was still silent, though. I sighed and pushed myself out of the desk chair, stretching my arms over my head._

_I surveyed the room with mild interest noting that it looking like a clothing tornado had hit. I halfheartedly kicked a GSU sweatshirt into one of the bigger piles of clothing. That was about as in depth into cleaning I would get. My roommate was the same. I still hadn't decided if that was a good or bad thing. I collapsed onto my bed. _

_I was kidding myself if I was expecting that phone call. I couldn't even explain why I cared or why I still waited around, feeling as anxious as a little kid on Christmas Eve. He hadn't called last year, so why would this year be any different? Clearly he didn't care. I didn't know why I still did, though. It had been hit hard by the surprise of how much I missed him. Not having Daryl in my life wasn't as easy as I had thought it would be. I had been under the impression that I would gradually just forget he existed. Like I could just slowly phase him out of my life until it was like he was never there. _

_That had proved impossible. While being at school had kept me distracted, it had done nothing to ease the homesickness I felt for the lanky redneck that had once been my closest friend. 'You could always pick up the phone and call him…' the familiar thought ran through my mind. I quickly dismissed it, just like always. Why would I call someone who clearly didn't want to talk to me? It had been almost two long years without Daryl. Two years too long._

_The door to the room was suddenly thrown open and Tara stumbled in, tugging what looked like at least half a dozen balloons behind her. "Hey! Happy birthday, roomie!" She shouted excitedly. Her smile quickly faded, though, the edges of her lips turning down. "What's with the grumpy face? Birthdays are supposed to be fun and I'll be damned if I let you sit around and mope all night!"_

_I gave her a small smile, rolling onto my stomach. "Balloons, huh?" I said, deliberately changing the subject. Tara wasn't so fooled. Her eyes slid from me to the phone on my desk._

_"We are not doing this again. Look, Charlie, if he wanted to talk he would call you. I don't even know why you care at this point. I may not know him personally, but I still know enough to see this is a lost cause. Let him go. It's his loss." She said, sitting down on the foot of my bed. I watched as the balloons escaped from her grasp and began to bounce around on the ceiling. "We are going out. So put on something cute, get all dolled up, and let's go. I'm not letting you spend another birthday feeling shitty. I'm also confiscating this." She grabbed my cell phone and slid it into her purse. _

_I opened my mouth the protest but she silenced me with a look that clearly said she was not messing around. I rolled my eyes, feeling defeated. "Alright fine. But I need a drink first."_

_Tara's grin returned. "That's the spirit! And lucky for you, I came prepared."_

_I couldn't help but laugh as she pulled a clear bottle from her purse. "Vodka. You know me too well." I got up and dug through the desk drawer until I pulled out two hot pink shot glasses. Tara filled the glass up to the rim and I perked an eyebrow at her. "That's a big shot."_

_She shrugged. "This is a big day. It's your birthday. Drink up!"_

_We clinked the little glasses together and I threw the liquid down the back of my throat. It burned as it ran down my throat and I felt the warmth reach my chest, radiating from underneath my skin. _


	16. Chapter 16

"You two knew each other before all this?" A man in a police officer's uniform stood in front of me, eyebrows perked in interest.

"We were kids together." I said quietly, finally feeling brave enough to meet the officer's eyes.

"So I trust her. She says she ain't with that other group, then she ain't with them." Daryl added. The look in his eyes dared someone to argue with him.

"So that just makes it all okay then, huh? You two played hopscotch together twenty years ago, and that makes it okay to trust her?" The familiar gruff voice sent shivers coursing down my spine. The burly, dangerous looking man that had interrogated me in the shack suddenly pushed his way to the front of the small gathering. I hadn't noticed he was there until now. His dark eyes bore into me, making me feel extremely uncomfortable. I struggled to hold his gaze, refusing to let him know just how uneasy he made me.

"Back off, Shane. You ain't in no position to be judging nobody." Daryl's grip tightened on his crossbow.

"Oh yeah? And a redneck like you is feelin' important enough to-"

The police officer placed a hand on Shane's shoulder, holding him back. "This doesn't need to turn into a brawl."

Shane quickly shrugged out of his grasp and took two giant strides in my direction. I stumbled back a few steps, remember the feeling of his powerful fist slamming against the side of my cheek. Daryl suddenly stepped in front of me, though, shielding me from Shane and taking me by complete surprise. "You're not gonna touch her." He said in a slow, deliberate tone. He kept his crossbow down but I could see how tense the muscles in his arms were, ready to spring into action at any given second.

"So what? We're supposed to just trust this girl because you do?" Shane growled.

Before he could answer, an older gentleman with a peppered beard and a flamboyant Hawaiian shirt spoke up. "I trust Daryl. If he believes her, then so do I. Has anyone considered maybe she was just in the wrong place at the wrong time when Randall was found?"

I felt relief wash through me as I met the eyes of the older man who was speaking up for me, despite knowing nothing about me aside from what Daryl and I had just shared about our past.

"This decision isn't just one person's to make, though. As a group, we need to decide what's in our best interest here. Then, we need to get Hershel's approval. This is his farm…not ours. We need to remember that. We need to have a meeting, inside, now." The officer said. I could tell from the way he spoke and the way the others listened to him that he was a man with authority and the one they all looked to for guidance.

The man called Shane gave Daryl and me a furious glare, clearly in disagreement with this decision. He stormed off in the direction of the forest, where we had just come from. No one stopped him and I knew I was glad to see him go away, at least for a little while.

"You already know how I feel. I'll wait out here with Charlie, keep an eye on her so to speak." The older man caught my eye and gave me a kind smile.

"I'm gunna go git' the truth out of that sorry piece of shit." Daryl announced. He met my gaze for a split second before turning abruptly and heading in the direction of the small shack where I assumed Randall was still being kept prisoner.

"Maggie, go get your father and have everyone in the house get together in the living room. I want to make a decision sooner rather than later." The uniformed man said over his shoulder. A pretty girl with short, dark hair nodded and disappeared into the house. The others on the porch all began to file inside, many casting me curious looks before entering the farmhouse. Finally, it was just the three of us left; the older man, the officer, and myself.

"You don't seem like a threat. I don't think you would have come so willingly if your intention was to cause us harm." The officer spoke to me in a soft tone. He wore the expression of someone who had a duty to fill and had the weight of the world resting on his shoulders. I could see the kindness deep in his eyes, though, and I immediately was met with the feeling that this was someone I wanted to trust. "But I've been wrong before. You need to tell me if you were a part of that other group, though. The one Randall was in."

I immediately shook my head. "No, I swear it. Until you found me that night, I had been alone for two months, maybe more…it's hard to keep track." I paused for a moment, the weight of my words hitting me and I was surprised by how badly I wanted this man, this stranger, to believe me. "Daryl and I were friends for over half my life until…" I hesitated. "…until all this." There was no need to go into the gritty details of the demise of our friendship. Not now anyways.

The officer nodded. "Wait out here. I'm not sure how long this will be. Thank you, Dale." He nodded towards the other man who had stayed patiently silent throughout the entire exchange. The screen door slammed shut as the uniformed leader joined the others in the house.

"Rick is a good man. You can have faith in him." The bearded man smiled at me. "My name's Dale, by the way."

"I'm Charlotte. But everyone just calls me Charlie." I answered.

"Back in my younger years I had a girlfriend named Charlotte. Beautiful name." Dale said, taking a seat on the top step of the porch.

I felt a genuine smile tug the corners of my lips. "Thank you. And thank you for standing up for me. You had no reason to, you don't even know me. But you did it anyways."

"Like Rick said, you don't seem like a threat to me. Just a young woman simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, which is something we've all been guilty of at one time or another. I'm sorry no one believed you from the beginning." He said quietly.

I shrugged my shoulders. "It's over and done with. I'm more worried about what they're all saying in there." I frowned, nodding towards the house.

Dale chuckled. "Don't get worried just yet. We're good people…most of us. If Rick wants to trust you, then the others might have an easier time following his lead."

"Most of us…" I repeated. "I'm assuming the exception would be that awful military looking guy? Shane?"

A dark expression appeared on Dale's face. "He doesn't have the greatest reputation around here. Not anymore."

I felt my curiosity being struck but didn't press the topic. Whatever the story was behind that remark, it wasn't my business. before I could ask him to explain, Daryl approached us from the opposite side of the yard. He had a smug look on his face, one I had remembered seeing numerous times before. I didn't think I would ever get used to seeing him here, I had grown so accustomed to just thinking about him as a part of my past. Yet there he was, as real as ever.

"Got 'em to talk a little. Didn't say much, but admitted lying to Shane to save his own ass." He said as he got closer. "Still in there?" He asked, looking towards the house.

I nodded, crossing my arms over my chest. "Yep. Deliberating my fate." I said with a sigh.

Daryl gave no indication that he had heard my words, instead brushing past Dale and I up the steps. "I'm gonna see what the hell is takin' so damn long." He disappeared inside and the door swung shut behind him.

"Has he always been impatient?" Dale asked me, a small smile on his lips.

"As long as I've known him." I answered, leaning forward and resting my chin between my hands, my elbows propped on my bent knees.

"I'm curious as to how the Daryl I know differs from the one you grew up with." The elder man said thoughtfully.

I was quiet for a moment as I pondered his words. "I don't know." I finally said, shaking my head. "I don't know this Daryl. We're like strangers now. It's been that long."

I could feel Dale's gaze on me, but continued to stare off into the distance suddenly feeling nostalgic and aching for the past where things were so much more cut and dry, so much easier than they were now.

"How long? I assumed you lost contact after the outbreak."

I snorted back a laugh. "Nope, it was way before that. It's been almost ten years." Almost a full decade, though it felt so much less than that now after seeing him with my own eyes. I didn't get a chance to say anything else as suddenly the door to the house opened and chatter spilled out onto the porch. I quickly stood and descended the steps, turning to face the others' decision. Dale joined me at my side, giving me a reassuring smile. I tried to smile back, but I felt almost sick with nerves.

Rick came out first and my eyes traveled up to meet his own steely gaze, almost afraid of what I would find there. He looked more tired than he had been, though there was nothing about his expression that suggested I was going to be thrown back into my makeshift cell with Randall. Still, I found it hard to relax while my fate was still seemingly undecided.

The other drifted out behind him and I quickly found Daryl's familiar lanky frame. He didn't join me on the lawn, though, and instead leaned against the side of the house with his arms crossed over his chest. Our eyes met for just a brief moment yet again, though he quickly looked away. It was almost frustrating. It seemed as if he couldn't stand to look at me, which made no sense. Why try so hard to convince the others to accept me if he didn't want me here? Why bring me back at all?

"Charlie…" Rick's familiar southern drawl cut through my thoughts. I whipped my head to look at him. "We've come to a decision and we'd like you to stay. We'll have to keep a close eye on you until we feel you can be totally trusted, but I'm sure you understand that. Daryl made it clear you're not the type to cause trouble. Plus, we could always use an extra set of hands around here."

I raised my eyebrows slightly. "You want me to stay here?" I couldn't keep the surprise out of my voice. At the most I thought they'd give me my stuff back and send me along my way. I couldn't believe I was being asked to stay. To be a part of a group.

"If you'd like to. By all means if you wanna leave, you can go. You said you're alone, though, and I know how much of burden that can be." Rick answered.

I didn't know what to say. On one hand, I wanted more than anything to be around other people. I had been craving it ever since I had lost Gabe. Yet, on the other hand I was terrified of what it meant to be a part of a group. To have others rely on me, and vice versa. What if I couldn't handle it? Yet despite the torrent of thoughts racing through my head, I was already answering. "I would like that…to stay." I said quietly. "Thank you."

Rick nodded once. "T-Dog has your belongings." He said, gesturing towards a large bald black man who came forward and handed me my worn out back pack and trusty baseball bat. I felt a huge wave of relief wash over me as he placed them in my outstretched arms.

"Welcome to the family." He said with a grin. I smiled back, hugging my possessions close to my body.

"And I'm sure between Lori and Carol we can came up with some clean clothing for you, too." Rick said. He motioned to a dark haired woman next to him, thin and wiry, and a withdrawn looking woman on her other side with grey hair cut into a buzz.

"I might have some that'll fit her. She looks about my size." Maggie piped up, offering me a warm smile which I returned gratefully. I could already feel myself being overwhelmed by the amount of kindness I was being shown.

"Well first things first, Rick, the girl needs a place to stay." Lori said, resting a gentle hand on Rick's arm. I could tell by the intimacy of the gesture that this must have been his wife.

"There's plenty of room in the RV. Charlie can bunk with Andrea and me." Dale's voice came from next to me.

"Whoa, hold on a second. You're willing to let a stranger into where we sleep?" A blonde woman with a sour looking expression suddenly spoke up from where she had been perched on the porch railing. I got the impression this must have been Andrea. "Why doesn't she stay with Daryl? She's his friend, right?" All eyes immediately turned to Daryl.

"Why don't you pull that stick outta yer' ass, woman, or should I do it for ya'?" Daryl quipped back. "Besides, I ain't got any room fer' her."

I tried not to feel offended. Of course I couldn't stay with Daryl. We hadn't seen each other in ten years…that hardly constituted as being friends. Plus, I knew how he had been with his space. If I were to guess, he had his own little camp pitched as far away from everyone else as possible.

"It's my RV, my decision. Charlie can stay with us. If you don't like it, Andrea, you can find another place to sleep." Dale said in a tone that clearly stated that there wasn't going to be an argument.

"You afraid she's gonna attack you in your sleep? Girl can't weigh more than a hundred pounds." T-Dog said with a laugh. Andrea shot him a glare but kept her mouth shut. I felt a tiny smile stretching my lips as I met his gaze.

"Well, it's all settled then. Let me show you around your new home." Dale gently placed an arm around my shoulder as he steered me away from the group and towards, as he had said, my home.


	17. Chapter 17

**_22 years old_**

_I never really appreciated how much I missed the country until I had left the city well and good behind me. Sounds of traffic and construction were replaced by the calming noises of the crickets chirping in the grass and the soft babble of the creek that ran through the backyard. I had also forgotten how dark the night could really be when there wasn't a constant stream of headlights and street lamps lining every road._

_I gave myself a moment to take it all in, the smells, the sounds, the feels, because I knew it would be the last time I'd be able to for a while. Everything was happening so fast, it was almost hard to believe it was happening at all. Two months ago I'd been drowning in college finals, crawling towards graduation. Then, everything seemed to speed up. I graduated, I got offered and accepted a job teaching in Atlanta, and now I was at my parents' house packing the few belongings I still kept there to take with me to my new life. All that could really make a girl's head spin. _

_My thoughts were suddenly scattered as a cardboard box slammed down into the back of my pickup truck. I jumped nearly a foot into the air. "Jesus, Gabe! You almost gave me a heart attack!" I gasped. _

_My little brother laughed. "How did you not hear me coming? I almost dropped the thing like five times. What the heck is in there? Dead bodies?"_

_I rolled my eyes. "Yes, Gabe. I store my dead bodies in a cardboard box in a closet at mom and dad's house. Is that the last one?"_

_He nodded. "Yep! I'd tell you to go say good-bye to mom one last time, but I'm worried if she cries anymore she'll dehydrate."_

_I let out a chuckle. "Yeah, I think the last ten good-byes were enough. She acts like I'm moving to Mars. Where my new job is really isn't much farther than where I was living at school."_

_Gabe shrugged. "She doesn't care. I think she's just sad that you're all grown up now."_

_"Well, I don't feel all grown up." I sighed, running a hand through my hair. I pushed the tailgate up, locking it in place. "If you ever get tired of it here, you can come visit. I know 8__th__ grade can be tough."_

_"Yeah, that sounds cool."_

_"Good. Alright, I know you don't want to, but give me a hug before I go." I said, spreading my arms._

_"Wait! I almost forgot, I wanted to give you something." Gabe said suddenly. Before I could ask, he had already turned and sprinted into the house. A few seconds later, he came back out, this time with something grasped in his hands. "Here." He said breathlessly, holding it out to me. _

_My heart swelled a little as I realized what it was. "Gabe, that's your lucky baseball bat. I can't take that." I said softly. I remembered the day my dad had given it to him, as a surprise when he was eight years old. He had been so excited to have his own bat to show off at baseball practice. Ever since then, he claimed he couldn't win a game without it._

_"I don't need it anymore. I'm good enough without it. But it might bring you luck." He said, pressing it into my hands. "Or, you know, maybe some robber will sneak into your apartment one night and you can whack him with it."_

_I laughed, although at the same time I was fighting back tears. I would wait until Gabe had gone back inside before letting the dam loose. Brother or not, no fourteen year old boy wanted to be stuck with the task of comforting a sobbing girl. "Thanks, kiddo. This means a lot." I held the bat in one hand and wrapped my free arm around him, pulling him close. He hugged me back briefly before pulling away and giving me a grin._

_"Have fun on Mars!"_

_I ruffled his hair as I made my way to the cab of the truck. I slid the bat across the passenger seat before I hopped in myself. "I'll send you an alien." I joked. "Love you, little brother." I started the engine and slowly began to back out of the driveway._

_"Love you too, Charlie!" He hollered after me._

_I smiled, blinking back a few tears as I pulled onto the main road. It felt like leaving for college all over again, only more permanent. I hadn't gone more than a few feet before a familiar gravel driveway came into view. I instinctively slowed down a little. The tiny white house at the top of the drive was dark and still, but a truck sat in the driveway. I bit my lip for a second, wondering if it was Daryl. If it was, it was probably better to just drive on. Instead, I turned into the driveway. _

_I put the truck in park and turned off the engine. I sat quietly in the cab for a second, wondering if this was a good idea. What did I have to lose, though? For all I knew, that was Mr. Dixon's truck. I climbed out, the gravel crunching under my feet as I made my way up the drive._

_I felt a mix of relief and disappointment as I got closer to the truck and realized it wasn't Daryl's, or at least wasn't the one I last remembered him having. It was the wrong color and the bed of the truck was a little too big. I sighed inwardly. What the hell was I thinking anyways? That Daryl might still be living here? That he'd see me wandering around his driveway and forget about the last time we had spoken? That everything would be the way it was five years ago? I was an idiot and as that started to sink in, I began to regret stopping here. I was about to turn around when a familiar voice stopped me in my tracks._

_"Well, shit. Wouldya look at what the cat dragged in!"_

_A smile automatically began to tug at my lips. "Merle."_

_"Hey there, city girl. What's your ass doin' so far from home?" He had suddenly appeared next to the truck, beer bottle in hand._

_Before I could stop myself, I had closed the space between us and thrown my arms around his middle. He froze for a second but I was surprised when one arm squeezed my shoulders. I kept the hug brief, though and quickly stepped back. He looked the same as I remembered. Same dirty, old redneck. _

_"Aren't you a sight for sore eyes." I smiled._

_He shrugged. "Now I know I ain't that pretty to look at. Didn't think I'd ever see ya again, girlie."_

_"Not sticking around. Just came to grab the last of my stuff before heading back to Atlanta. I got a job out there now."_

_Merle took a swig of his beer before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "And you just decided to stop and see ole' Merle before ya disappear forever?" He smirked. "Or ya hopin' to run into my baby brother?"_

_I shifted uncomfortable, but didn't say anything. Merle had asked a question he already knew the answer to. He knew it and let out a laugh. _

_"He's been long gone from these parts. Took off, not sure where he went. After that nasty lil' spat you two lovebirds had, I didn't think you'd come lookin' for him."_

_I ignored the emphasis he put on 'lovebirds'. "He's gone? Moved away gone?"_

_Merle shrugged again, draining his beer bottle and tossing it over his shoulder. "He'll come back. Usually always does. Want me to give little Daryl a message?" He grinned slyly. "Some sweet nothins'?"_

_I shook my head, although I was glad it was dark and he couldn't see how uncomfortably red I was. "No, I don't think I have anything nice to say to him. Not anymore." I replied. I could feel Merle's gaze on me, but refused to meet his eyes. _

_"My baby brother likes to run away from his problems. He's good at that, like all Dixons. Don't git all hurt about it." Merle said. _

_I sighed. "Yeah, I think I know that." I watched as he pulled another bottle from the bed of the pickup truck, popping the top off._

_"I hear that big city callin' your name, sugar tits. You better git on home. Ain't you afraid of bein' out in the dark?"_

_I snorted, rolling my eyes. "The dark never scared me anymore than you did, Merle." I took a few steps back. "I guess I'll get going, though. See you around."_

_"Our paths are gonna cross again, sweetheart, don't you worry!" He called after my retreating back. I looked over my shoulder at him, but didn't say anything. Seeing Merle had awakened in my just how much I missed his brother. While I wasn't sure if the older Dixon was right, if our paths would cross again, I was almost certain mine wouldn't be crossing with Daryl's anytime soon. _

_Minutes later, I was back in my truck and speeding down the dirt road. Every mile I went pushed my old home and my old life further and further behind me. This time, though, I was determined to leave it all behind, Daryl included._

* * *

__**Author's Note**

Hello my lovely reader! Sorry to interrupt your reading, but I just wanted to take the time to thank you all for giving my little Daryl Dixon story a chance. I can't believe I'm already up to 50 followers! That's more than I ever expected and I can't even begin to explain how happy I am to see that. Plus, all the reviews have been so nice! I am extremely dedicated to this story and have some great plans for it. Thank you all for keeping me motivated helping me to become the best writer I can be! You all are incredibly wonderful.

One last thing! Don't forget you can message me with any comments, questions, concerns...or even just to say hi! I'd love to hear from you.

:D


	18. Chapter 18

That night, inside Dale's old RV, was the best I'd slept in months. For the first time in a long time, I slept through the night well into the morning. I hadn't realized how exhausted I was until Dale had finished up the camp tour and showed me to a bed in the RV. An actual bed. Pretty sure I was dead to the world before my head even hit the pillow.

Waking up the next morning, I was hit with that momentary confusion that sometimes happens when you fall asleep in a strange place. For once, I wasn't sleeping on a hard floor in the rickety loft of an old bar, or on the moldy carpet in the basement of an abandoned house. I laid there for a minute, sorting through my memories of the day before. A part of me was still uncertain if this was real or not. I mean, Daryl Dixon? I had sworn him from my memories years ago. Yet here we were. In the same one mile radius for the first time since we were kids. The thought made me nervous, although I wasn't really sure why.

I finally forced myself from the bed, ran a hand through my tangled hair and stepped out into the morning. I could tell it was still early, yet I seemed to be the last one in the camp to rise. I could see a few other campers seated at a picnic table near a fire, laughing together, while Lori and Carol hung laundry on a line nearby. I was struck with that first day of school feeling. The feeling of being the odd one out, yet wanting to fit in so badly. I hesitated, wondering if I should just go join the others, or just keep to myself.

"We don't bite, ya know."

I jumped, wondering how I had missed one of the group's members appearing at my side. He was wearing a contagious lopsided grin, and I recognized him not only from last night, but from the night he had helped take me hostage. That particular memory seemed like it was from a different life time.

"Yeah, but for some reason I feel more worried about all of you then the things out there that actually do bite." I answered, giving him a small smile.

He let out a laugh. "My name's Glenn, by the way. Don't think we were ever properly introduced." He held out a hand.

"Charlie." I said, accepting his handshake. I could tell I already liked him, especially the way he made it seem like I was already an accepted member of the group, even though I had only arrived yesterday.

"Well, Charlie, you look hungry. You gonna put on a brave face and sit at the same table as the rest of us, or do I have to drag you over there?" He asked with another smile.

I rolled my eyes jokingly. "You sound like Daryl."

At that, Glenn let out a loud laugh before gently placing an arm around my shoulder and leading me into the center of the camp.

T-Dog, Dale, and Andrea were seated at the table when Glenn led me over. He dropped down onto the bench and patted the seat next to him. Andrea shot me a glare and immediately left the table. I tried not to feel hurt, but couldn't ignore the sting she left behind.

"Wow…am I really that bad?" I asked out loud.

Glenn shrugged, grabbing some food from the plates in the center of the table. "She gets that way sometimes. And what I mean by that is, she can be a real bitch."

I snorted with laughter along with T-Dog.

"Andrea will come around. Just give her some time." Dale said over our laughter. He met my gaze with a friendly smile and pushed a plate towards me. "Now eat. You look starved."

Truthfully, I was. I wasn't used to food being so easy, at least not anymore. Here it was, just sitting on the table in front of me rather than me having to go out in search of it.

Dale must have read the look on my face. "Don't feel bad about eating. We all help out around here. Just pull your own weight and no one will make any complaints about sharing food." He said kindly.

I nodded and didn't hesitate a second longer before tucking in.

I had just finished rinsing off my plate and adding it to the dish pile when Maggie appeared at my side. "Hey, I just finished going through some of my old clothes and I found a few things that might fit you." She said with a smile. "Although-" She quickly eyed me up and down. "…I think you could do with a shower."

I felt my cheeks burning, though it was probably hard to tell I was blushing underneath all the dirt and grime that covered my skin. "That's probably a good idea…" I said. When was the last time I had even taken a proper shower? I racked my brain but couldn't remember. Usually I just filled up a water bottle and dumped it over my head, which is just as about effective as it sounds.

Maggie led me inside the farmhouse, which looked every bit the way I would expect a farmhouse to look on the inside, and showed me the bathroom upstairs. "The clothes are there, in that bag." She said, nodding to a large trash bag in the corner. "The farm runs on a back-up generator so try not to take too long or use too much hot water. But other than that, you're good." She quickly showed me how to adjust the knobs from hot to cold and how to get the shower running.

I was once again struck by how different today had been so far. It was a drastic change from how I had spent the last two months. The amount of kindness I was being shown by a set of complete strangers was overwhelming. "Thanks. For everything…it's been…complete hell to say the least." I said, trying to convey just how grateful I was to Maggie.

She smiled. "Happy to help." She said, before shutting the door behind me.

I kept the shower down to just a few minutes, but it was by far the greatest shower I had ever had. Maybe an exaggeration, but after months without having access to one, I was in heaven. Plus, I had soap. What a fantastic invention. I got out of the shower feeling like I had shed a layer and like I was lighter than I had been in weeks. I dressed in a pair of jean shorts and a flannel shirt, glad that Maggie had been right and we were roughly the same size. I took my old clothes and stuffed them into the trash can. I looked in the mirror above the sink, relieved to see my reflection hadn't changed that much over the span of the last few months. I pulled my hair back into a low ponytail before lacing up my old boots and leaving the bathroom with the bag of clothes slung over my shoulder.

After I had stowed them safely away in the RV, I set out to find some task to help with. I needed a way to convey my thanks and show that I was capable of pulling my own weight. I suddenly realized, though, that I had yet to see Daryl that morning. My thoughts trailed back to the previous evening when Dale had gestured off into the distance, telling me that Daryl's camp was "somewhere over there"…basically just away from everyone else. I smiled a little, thinking about how I was right. Daryl liked his space. Always had.

"Wow, almost didn't recognize you." Dale said with a smile, walking towards me.

I smiled back. "Thanks. I feel like a new person."

"Glad to hear it. Lookin' for something to help out with?" He asked.

"Yes, actually. But first…I was wondering where I might-"

"Find Daryl?" Dale cut me off.

I nodded sheepishly. "Yeah…I was hoping I could talk to him real quick."

"You can try, but Daryl's not really much of a talker. But then again, I guess you know that." Dale said, looking at me thoughtfully. "You two really grew up together?"

I nodded.

"Just strange to think about Daryl ever being close with anyone. He doesn't seem like the type."

"He's not. There's a reason we stopped being friendly." I answered, frowning slightly. Dale nodded, but I was glad he didn't press for more. I wasn't really in the mood to revisit that little memory just yet. He pointed out the way to Daryl's camp, telling me to find Lori afterwards if I was looking for a way to help out. I thanked him and headed off.

I didn't have to go very far before a small tent come into view, set off by itself. Parked next to it was a motorcycle. I didn't know Daryl could ride one. Then, yet again, I supposed there was a lot about him I didn't know anymore. I moved closer to the bike, admiring what a pretty machine it was. Very sleek. I ran my hands over the handlebars. I wondered how hard it was to drive one of these things…

"Hey, hands off the bike!"

I jumped back suddenly, nearly stumbling to the ground. Daryl had emerged from the tent, crossbow slung over his shoulder. He stopped, seeing it was me and not another one of the campers. He stared at me for a long moment, though it was hard to read the expression in his eyes. I squirmed a little, feeling a bit uncomfortable.

"See you ain't lookin' like complete shit now."

"Wow, well that's one way to put it. Thanks." I said, sarcasm dripping from my words.

He ignored this and brushed past me, gathering up a handful of arrows that had been in a bundle near a log that was clearing being used as a makeshift seat. Clearly he wasn't in the mood for chatter, but I pressed on.

"Look, I won't drag this out and make it anything but what it is…but I just wanted to say…you know..thanks. Thank you for bringing me back here and standing up for me…and for not shooting me in the woods. Its..nice. Being around other people." I said quickly, fidgeting slightly.

I had almost forgot how nervous he made me, which was weird. He never used to make me feel that way, but this was a Daryl I didn't really know. One who seemed to have forgotten we used to be something called 'friends'. I didn't think it was possible to ever get back to that place, but I was determined to at least try and be civil.

Daryl grunted in reply, working on strapped his arrows over his shoulder and shoving his hunting knife into a sheath at his side. I figured that was a close as to an actual response I was going to get. I should have just turned and went back to camp, but I kept talking. "Anyways, where you going? You look like you're getting ready to do battle." I said, continuing to watch him.

"Hunting."

"Oh…well, good luck. I guess." I said, shifting my weight from one left to the other.

I heard Daryl let out a sigh before turning to face me for the first time since I had arrived in his camp. "You don't gotta come all the way over here and try to make nice with me. I already told ya' yesterday, I brought you back cause' I didn't want you dyin' out in them woods hanging over my head. So I get it, you're happy they accepted ya' into our little merry group, but that don't mean anything for us. You and me. We ain't friends anymore, Charlie. So don't go tryin' to make that happen. It's been too damn long."

I was surprised by the sting I felt at his words. Hadn't I just been thinking it wasn't possible for us to be friends again? I ignored the sting, but it was hard to ignore the sudden rush of unexpected anger I felt building inside me. "I know that. I'm not an idiot. Just thought that maybe we could at least be civil, but apparently not. I don't even know why I bothered. Just forget it." I said, glaring hard at him before turning around and stomping off. I could feel his steely gaze on me but refused to even spare him another glance.

I didn't stop until I had finally reached the rest of the camp, and even then, I still felt grudgingly angry. I tried to push that feeling aside as I caught sight of Lori. I made my way over to her. "Can I help with anything?" I ask, hoping most of the acid had left my tone.

Some of it must have still been there, though, because Lori paused with a dish in her hand. "You alright?"

"Fine. Just…it's nothing. Don't worry about it." I said, not sure if I was completely ready to spill the truth about what happened between Daryl and I. That was a can of worms that I would wait to open.

She nodded, though still looked a little concerned. "If you say so…I'm actually just finished up here, but I think we can find something for you to do. Anything you're particularly good at? Cooking? Hauling woods?"

I snorted. "Neither of those. Especially not cooking unless you have a microwave stashed away somewhere. I'm pretty crafty, though, when I was teaching I would-"

"Wait, you were a teacher?" Lori asked, suddenly looking excited.

I paused before answering uncertainly. "Well, yeah. Before all of this I was. High school. Not exactly a necessary trade when it comes to zombie apocalypses. You can't teach zombies to not eat people."

Lori ignored this pathetic attempt at a joke. "No, it's perfect! You see, I have a son. He's young, but maybe you could, I don't know, do some lessons with him? Carol and I used to teach the kids, but neither of us were really great at it. I just think it's wrong to not try to continue to educate him, despite-"

I cut her off quickly. "Lori, slow down! I'll do it. If that's really how I can help out. In fact, I think I would like that just as much as you would. I'll teach your son. You said 'kids', though…are there more?" I asked curiously, looking around. So far I hadn't seen many, besides the one dark haired boy I assumed might be her son.

Lori got a dark look on her face and glanced over her shoulder where Carol was a short distance away, folding clothing. "Not anymore…Carol had a daughter. But…we lost her. Not too long ago, actually."

"Oh, God. I'm so sorry." I said in a hushed tone, sparing a glance towards the short haired woman working behind Lori. I couldn't imagine the pain of losing a child. Losing my parents had been hard enough…and Gabe…well, I still refused to believe I had lost him.

"Yes, so try not to say anything to her just yet. I don't think she's ready to really talk about it."

"No I won't." I said quietly. I cleared my throat after a moment. "Anyways, I can teach your son. Just tell me when and where, and I'll do my best. It'll be nice to know that college education wasn't a complete waste of money in this new world."

"Great, let me go get Carl." She said happily, finishing drying off the last dish and hurrying away.


	19. Chapter 19

**_28 years old_**

**_6 months ago_**

_"…just outside of Savannah, Georgia there has been yet another report of one of these unusual, violent attacks. The attacker was incapacitated by the police and both he and the victim are residing in area hospitals…"_

_"Hey, guess what?"_

_I heard Gabe yelling at me from the living room, where he was sprawled across my couch watching the news. I didn't glance up from the meat in the frying pan as I pushed it around with my spatula._

_"Yes?"_

_My brother poked his head around the corner of the wall that separated the kitchen from the living room. "They caught another guy eating someone's face off. That's like the tenth time this month. There saying it's some sort of rabies or something." _

_I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, sounds like yet another epidemic of bath salts to me." _

_Gabe grinned at me before disappearing into the other room again. "I don't know, Char, maybe we should go get some rabies shots."_

_I snorted with laughter. "You go right ahead. Maybe they'll make rabies shots mandatory for college students." I joked back. I scraped the meat from the pan and into a plastic bowl on the counter. "Turn that shit off, tacos are ready."_

_"I can't, I'm waiting to see if they're going to show a video of this guy getting eaten." Gabe hollered back._

_I shook my head, wiping my hands on a kitchen towel before making my way into the living room. I perched myself on the arm of the couch, sparing a glance at Gabe and smirking a little at the enraptured look he was giving the television. I was surprised at how much I liked having my little brother around. He had pretty much begged me to let him move in to my Atlanta apartment after his sophomore year of college, claiming another year of dorm life would kill him. I tried to point out that I had lived in a dorm for three years and I was fine, but apparently that made me a minority. I had pretty much refused to give up my office for his bedroom at first, claiming the living room was a perfect living space for him, but in the end I had lost that argument also. To be fair, I don't think I really would have made him sleep on the couch every night. Having Gabe around was great. Definitely not the nightly college frat party I had been expecting. I wrestled the remote from his hand without much of a fight and pointed it at the TV to turn it off. I hesitated a moment._

_"With over two dozen cases of this strange, erratic behavior being reported across the nation, the so called rabies epidemic seems to be spreading at a rapid pace. The CDC asks that anyone displaying any signs of these unusually violent symptoms be taken to the nearest hospital as soon as possible. In the meantime, doctors and scientists continue to search for answers-" _

_I pressed the power button and the screen turned black. I tried to shake the bad feeling that had been clouding over me as I had watched the reporters._

_"Hey, it was just getting good!" My little brother protested. He tried to swipe the remote from my hand, but I stood and held it out of reach. At twenty years old, Gabe was still a good head taller than me and could easily take the remote back but I knew he knew better than to argue with me about food. _

_"Dinner time." I stated simply, pointing in the general direction of the kitchen. _

_He made a face at me before pulling himself off the couch and disappearing into the other room._

_"And its bath salts, Gabe. Not rabies." I hollered after him. I tried to keep my tone light and joking, but that dark cloud still hovered over me and I couldn't rid myself of the knots beginning to twist in my stomach. I tossed the remote onto the couch cushion and followed after Gabe. I had no idea why I felt so worried about this. It wasn't the first time the news had made a big deal about a sudden, unidentified illness spreading. Hadn't that been the case when mad cow disease happened? When the bird flu happened? 'Maybe, but this is the first time one of the symptoms of the disease was a sudden hunger for human flesh', a voice in the back of my brain reminded me. Gabe must have caught the look on my face as I sat down at the table._

_"What? You're not gonna pull a 'mom' on me, are you?" He asked, perking an eyebrow._

_I gave him a look before shaking my head. I knew perfectly well what he meant by that. Our mother was probably the most paranoid people on the planet. She watched the news religiously, and she took every single word seriously. Very seriously. The basement at my parents' house resembled a bomb shelter of some sort. It was stocked with more canned goods and water jugs than any grocery store in Atlanta. And I'm sure when Gabe caught the look on my face then, he had automatically pictured me running off and buying out the canned good section of the grocery store and boarding up all the windows and doors. Fortunately, I hadn't turned into our mother. Not yet anyways._

_"People are on the news eating each other because, like I've said a hundred times, they took too many bath salts." I reminded him, filling up a tortilla with taco meat._

_Gabe shrugged. "Yeah…or the more obvious choice which is they're all turning into zombies." He said very seriously. We both shared a look before bursting out into laughter._

_"You watch too many horror movies." I chuckled._

_"Yeah, well, it's a thought. Zombies are supposedly real down in the Caribbean or something. You know, like voodoo priests and stuff." He grinned._

_I threw a piece of lettuce across the table at him. "Shut up and eat your dinner. You can fantasize more about the looming zombie invasion after you do the dishes."_

_He opened his mouth to protest but I silenced him with a look. He grumbled something about 'hating dishes' but didn't try to argue. I went back to carefully rolling up my taco, the bad feeling I had after watching the news slowly subsiding. It was silly to even feel the slightest bit worried. It was just bath salts, right?_


	20. Chapter 20

It was incredible how different I felt after just one week in my new home. It felt almost like I had a life again. Like the farm was a separate world from the apocalyptic one I had grown to know so well. In a way it was. I could tell the others felt the same way. We felt untouchable here, secluded from the death and decay of reality.

I think teaching Carl helped me the most. It was what my passion had been before the zombie world. I didn't think I'd ever get the chance to do it again, yet here I was. While it was extremely different than standing in front of a room full of thirty different kids, it still felt good to know this one kid hung on my every word. I think he was just glad his mom wasn't trying to teach him anymore. Although I chose not to share that with Lori. It seemed being pregnant was enough for her to deal with right now.

I had learned, through listening to the others, about Lori's fling with Shane. I tried not to judge her, but I just hated Shane so much that it was physically impossible for me to understand what the appeal was there. I had learned a great deal about Sophia as well. Surprisingly, Carol had reached out to me the most, though everyone (mostly) was kind. Carol was so quiet and gentle. She reminded me a lot of my own mother, which was maybe why I found myself wanting to spend so much time with her. I couldn't imagine losing a child in any situation, but losing one in this world seemed to much worse. Maybe because it felt like it shouldn't have happened. None of this should have been happening.

The only people who seemed still either extremely offended by my presence in the camp were Andrea and Shane. To be honest, I didn't care for them either so it didn't hurt my feelings too much. And I had feeling Andrea would come around sooner or later. She had almost agreed to letting me take over watch one night. Almost. It was better than outright saying hell no. The only real issues being faced were Randall and Daryl. The difference was that Randall was everyone's problem, and Daryl was my problem. He still refused to make nice with me. He treated me pretty much the same way he treated everyone else, which was what I hated. We had been friends for over half our lives and for some reason, we couldn't get over ourselves and act like it. Mostly Daryl couldn't get over himself. Which shouldn't have surprised me.

The screen door of the farmhouse slammed shut and I jumped a little. I glanced up from the picnic table where Carl and I were practicing cursive writing to see Dale striding towards us, looking angrier than I ever thought it was possible for him to be. "Keep working, little man." I murmured to Carl. I ruffled his hair a little before standing up and moving to meet Dale as he stormed through the camp.

"What happened? Are you alright?" I asked the older man, whom I had also grown very fond of.

He shook his head, not saying a word. I placed a hand gently on his arm and he slowed to a stop and looked at me. "They're going to kill him. Murder him."

I furrowed my eyebrows, confused. Then I realized. "Randall?"

"Yes! He has absolutely no chance. There's no humanity left in this world." He sighed, shaking his head. He looked absolutely defeated and I couldn't blame him.

Although I was definitely not Randall's biggest fan, I wasn't too excited about the idea of just killing him. Especially without any sort of trial or act of fairness. But, I supposed this world had a whole different set of rules I would never get used to. "No one else sided with you? Not even Glenn?" I asked.

Dale shook his head. "No…I believe his exact words were 'he's not one of us'."

I was surprised by this. I figured Glenn, of all people, would be on Dale's side. He had such an open mind, and was usually so kind-hearted. "But I wasn't one of you either…and you all let me stay."

"I know, Charlie…but before we knew you were a friend of Daryl's, they had the same debate going on. About what to do with you." He admitted, removing his hat from his hand and wringing it in his hands.

I wasn't shocked at this. In a way, I had already known that my new group hadn't wanted to accept me at first. Why else would they lock me in a shack and then send someone to drag me back after my escape? Only now I understood. They were scared, like I was, and just trying to do right by the ones they cared about. They wanted to protect each other. Still, I disagreed with an execution. It didn't seem right. My opinion didn't really count yet, though. Rick had explained, that while the others seemed to want to trust me, the fact was that this decision needed to be made without me, since it had begun before I joined the group. Plus, there was once a similar meeting held about me. I understood where he was coming from, which was why I agreed to stay outside and occupy Carl while the meeting went on.

"What's going to happen?" I asked quietly.

Dale shrugged. "I'm not sure. I feel like this group is slowly breaking a part. I don't know how to make it whole again. I don't know how I'll continue to stay here if they kill that boy."

Before I could say another word, the rest of the group slowly came out of the house. Daryl, Rick, and Shane were in the lead. My eyes immediately went to Daryl, taking in the stern expression on his face, the tense muscles in his arms, and the hard look in his eyes. It was a look I wasn't used to seeing on him, despite all the other expression I had seen him wear during the years we had been friends. One glance at the other two men and I knew they meant to do it now. They were going to execute Randall.

I felt my stomach tighten into knots at the thought. 'Could they really do that?' The thought flickered in my mind. 'Of course they can' an answering thought called out. Who was going to stop them? They were doing what they thought needed to be done. I understood that, but still. The idea of what was going to happen made me feel sick to my stomach. I glanced towards Carl who had looked up from his work and was watching the three men striding towards the barn with a curious expression. I was about to step in and distract him once again when Lori appeared at his side, smoothing back his hair.

Before I could stop myself, I was jogging to catch up with Rick, Shane, and Daryl. Shane spotted me approaching first and rolled his eyes.

"What? You gonna try and talk some sense into us? Save the day?" He drawled.

I ignored him and grabbed Daryl's arm. He seemed surprised at my touch and stopped, looking down at my fingers curled around the sinewy muscles of his arm. He quickly ripped his arm from my grasp though, looking impatient now.

"What, Charlie? What the hell do you want?" He demanded.

"I-" I began, but stopped, not even sure what I wanted to say or how to say it. "I just…are you really going to kill that boy?"

Daryl's mouth was set into a grim line as he nodded. "It's gotta be done. We can't trust him."

"But you convinced them to trust me!"

Daryl looked surprised. "Why you defendin' this jackass? He lied about you and nearly got you killed along with him."

I shook my head. "I don't know. I don't like him. It's just that…killing him. It doesn't seem right."

"It's not up to you, Charlie. Now git' away. You don't need to see this." With that, he turned on his heel and strode after the other two. They were headed towards the barn.

I didn't know why, but I followed after him. My head told me to turn around, that I didn't want to watch someone get killed, but I kept going anyways. When I reached the barn, Rick had already gotten Randall. He was on his knees, whimpering loudly, a sack pulled over his head. Shane stood off to the side, a malicious look in his eyes as he watched Rick raise his gun at the boy's head.

"Oh god." The words escaped my lips. My heart hammered in my chest. They were really going to do it.

Daryl whirled around and saw me there. "Charlie, git your ass outta here! I told ya, you don't need to see this!" He hissed at me.

Before I could even find my voice, another one spoke up, drowning out Randall's whimpering cried.

"Do it, dad."

Daryl and I both stared as Carl suddenly appeared in the barn, eyes on Rick.

"Do it." He said again.

"Carl…" I said quietly, a warning tone in my voice. He shouldn't be here, seeing this. Hell, Daryl was right. I didn't need to be here.

Rick looked utterly shocked. He dropped the gun and it clattered to the barn floor. "Take him away."

"What? Rick-" Shane protested.

"I said, take him away god damn it!"

Shane gritted his teeth, looking furious. His hand was on his own gun, tucked in its holster, but he left it. Instead, he yanked Randall up by the collar of his shirt and dragged him from the barn. I suddenly felt a firm hand on my wrist and I too was being steered out of the barn and into the night.

"Damn it, Charlie, can't you listen? Huh? Why the hell would you wanna watch that?" Daryl shouted at me. He let go of my wrist forcefully and I stumbled back a few steps.

"I-I didn't! I don't! I don't know…I just…I don't know what I was thinking, okay?"

He ran a hand through his hair. "I can't keep my damn eye on you all the time! Like your Carl, like you're a fuckin' child!"

My eyes widened. "What? I'm not asking you to! Jesus, Daryl, really? You've barely spoken to me for the past week. You've avoided me and now you're going to stand here and act like I'm a responsibility of yours? No! You can't have it both ways. You can't act like my babysitter one day and then the next day act like I don't exist."

He didn't say anything. We locked eyes and exchanged a long, angry glare. God, what had happened to us? We used to be friends. We used to be-

My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a loud, shrill cry for help. Our argument was left behind as we barreled towards the terrified sound.


	21. Chapter 21

**_Three months ago_**

_I sprinted down the streets of Atlanta, dodging debris and climbing over abandoned vehicles. I tried not to notice that most of the 'debris' I was trying to avoid was bodies, strewn all over the road. Some more dead than others. As if to prove this point, a rotting hand suddenly shot out from beneath an overturned truck and grabbed at my ankles as I ran by. I held back a yelp, stumbling back before regaining my footing and continuing to run. My backpack bounced up and down, the contents rattling around and smacking my back with each step, reminding me of why I had risked my life coming out here in the first place._

_"Five minutes." I breathed into the walkie talkie._

_"I'll be ready for you." Gabe's voice rang out from the device._

_I slipped into an alleyway adjacent with the street, stopping at the chain link fence that separated me from the other side. The groaning and shuffling of footsteps behind me was getting louder. I tried to ignore it as I grasped the fence in my hands and slowly made my way over the top. It wasn't until my feet had safely hit the pavement on the other side that I stopped to look. At least a dozen walkers had followed me into the alley. No doubt more were right behind them. Gabe and I had learned the hard way that the city wasn't the safest place during a zombie apocalypse. But then again, where exactly was safe? I started to run again._

_"30 seconds." I said into the walkie as I ran out into the street. I kept close to the buildings this time and as I turned the next corner, I spotted Gabe on our balcony. He dropped the rope as I came closer and I latched myself onto it. Through a combination of him pulling and me climbing, I was pulled into safety moments later. I collapsed down onto the floor, leaning against the wall as I tried to catch my breath. I noticed I was shaking. Nothing like running a deadly obstacle course through the city to get the blood pumping. _

_"You should have let me go." Gabe's voice scattered my thoughts._

_I glanced up at him to see the concerned expression that tugged the corners of his mouth downwards. "You went out last time."_

_"Yeah, that was weeks ago. Things weren't this bad then…those walkers are everywhere now." He argued. _

_I waved my hand to silence him. "Doesn't matter. I got what we needed and now we can get the hell out of here." I stood to my feet and slipped inside the apartment. Gabe followed, sliding the glass door shut behind us. Once inside, I shrugged off the pack and carefully emptied the contents onto the coffee table. Canned foods, bottles of water, bandages, and bullets. _

_Gabe's eyes grew wide. "You actually found ammo. Holy shit, I was positive all the stores would be cleared out by now."_

_I shrugged. "Just gotta know where to look. And anyways, remember what we talked about? Guns are a last resort. Only in an emergency."_

_He nodded. At the beginning of the outbreak, of this apocalypse of sorts, there had been utter panic. People seemed to be losing their minds with fear and rightly so. Gabe and I decided to wait it out inside our apartment, hoping there would be some sort of cure. Some sort of rescue for those of us who didn't make it out of the city in time. Of course, nothing came. Eventually, all the televisions stopped reporting news, all the radio stations went silent. Then the power went and there was nothing. Gabe had the smarts to hit the gun stores before things got too serious. Lucky for us. Unluckily for us, though, we discovered that guns could sometimes prove more harmful than helpful. They were too loud, too risky. Take down one walker, draw in five more._

_"I think we should leave first thing in the morning." I said. "I can't take being stuck here anymore."_

_"Are we ready for that?" Gabe asked, sinking down onto the couch._

_I dropped down next to him with sigh. "I don't think we have many other options, Gabe. The city's overrun. It has been for weeks. I think we both agree help isn't coming. What's the point of staying?"_

_"I know you're right. I want to get out of here, too. Find mom and dad. I'm just…I'm worried about what we'll really find when we get home." He said, voicing the exact though that had been plaguing both of us for too long. "Do you think they're alright?" _

_In that moment, he sounded so young and I saw him as the little kid he had been eight years ago. My first instinct was to lie. To tell him they would be fine, that everything would go back to normal and he shouldn't worry. I didn't have it in me, though. The only comfort I could afford to give him right now was the truth of the mess we were in. "I don't know." I said softly. "I hope so, though." _

_And I hoped Daryl was okay, too. This, I kept to myself, though. I had spent the last ten years trying to fill in the Daryl shaped gap in my life, but any fix was only temporarily. I didn't know what it was about the smart mouthed redneck, but I missed him something fierce. Especially right now. He would know what to do, where to go, how to survive. He had been doing it all his life. God, I hoped he was alright. He was tough. He had to be._

_I mentally shook myself, clearing my head. "We need to pack up. Get the lists we made. We only carry what we have to. Everything else has to stay behind." _

_Gabe didn't answer, but got up and left the room. I heard him rummaging through the hall closet and the sounds of a duffel bag being unzipped. I turned my attention towards the map spread out on the coffee table. The streets that were too dangerous to use were crossed out with a huge, black X. There was only one other way in and out of the city and it was the highway. I was apprehensive about using it, thinking about all the abandoned cars backed up for miles, holding passengers that had never made it out alive. It sent chills down my spine. But it was our best bet. Our best bet to get home._

_And to get to Daryl._


	22. Chapter 22

I ran until my lungs hurt, keeping stride with Daryl. My stomach was churning dangerously. The screams continued, full of anguish and terror. Before we even reached the fields, tears were streaming from my eyes. I knew what we were going to find there. I just didn't know who.

As we grew closer, the sounds subsided and it became horribly silent, a part from the sounds of a walker ripping into flesh. Daryl spotted the walker first and pulled out his knife, jamming it into the creature's skull. It fell to the side and I gasped as I saw who was lying under it.

It was Dale.

I fell to my knees, my breath coming in short bursts. I felt like I couldn't catch my breath, like my heart was just going to burst from my chest. This was the man that had stood up for me. This was the man who had trusted me and gave me a place to stay. In the short time I had known him, I had grown to admire Dale and even had begun to care about him. Now, he was lying here, covered in blood, his body torn to pieces. His breath was ragged and shallow. The only sound coming from his mouth was a horrible gurgling. I crawled closer, the tears coming harder.

"Dale." I whimpered quietly, grasping for his hand. His eyes found mine. They were wide, full of so much terror and pain.

"What do we do, what do we do?" I said in a panicky voice, looking up at Daryl. He didn't say anything. He was looking down at Dale with a mixed look of sadness and disbelief.

Suddenly, Herschel was there. Behind him came Rick, Andrea, Lori, and Carl. Lori gasped when she saw Dale and held Carl back, cradling his head into her chest. Andrea was on Dale's other side in an instant, grasping his hand. She was sobbing hysterically.

"Can you help him? You have to save him!" Rick was saying over and over again, though hopelessness was layered in his voice. He knew there was no chance. Herschel confirmed this a moment later.

"He's hurt too badly, losing too much blood. I'm sorry, Rick. I can't help him." He said quietly, barely audible over Andrea's sobs.

Rick nodded, looking numb as he pulled his gun out and pointed it at Dale's head. Dale met his eyes and seemed to be pleading for him to do it. God, he had to been in so much pain. I squeezed his hand harder. At least we would all be here with him when he went. Rick continued to hesitate, though. Finally, Daryl took the gun from his hand.

"Sorry, brother." He said quietly.

I squeezed my eyes shut and a second later there was a loud bang and Dale's body went limp. He was gone. I opened my eyes again to see Dale's still, unmoving form. Forever frozen in utter agony. Andrea draped herself over his chest, her shoulders shuddering with grief. I pulled myself to my feet and stumbled a few paces away where I abruptly began heaving and vomiting. I didn't know if it was from seeing the gore of Dale's body or watching him die, but I felt sick to my stomach. Yes, I had watched many people die. But I had never been that close for it. Right there when their last breath left their bodies. And Dale was so good…maybe one of the few good people left.

I fell to my knees, gasping for breath as the last of my stomach's contents came up. I wiped my mouth with my sleeve and realized I was shaking. Next thing I knew, I was being pulled to my feet.

"Calm down, sweetheart. It's okay." Carol's soft voice was in my ear. She began to walk with me across the field, struggling to support my weight. I was feeling like my knees might buckle again and bring us both down when I was suddenly swept from my feet and into a pair of arms. A familiar musky scent hits my nostrils and I looked up to see Daryl.

"I don't need to be carried." I murmured. The image of Dale's spilled intestines popped into my mind and my stomach clenched again. I gritted my teeth and shut my eyes. God, why Dale?

"Keep your mouth shut. I don't need to be covered in your puke." He said in a gruff voice. I didn't argue, but only because I was worried he was right. If I tried to talk, I'd probably just end up vomiting.

I was aware of Carol walking next to us as we made our way back into the camp. We bypassed the other tents and kept going till we had reached Daryl's little camp. He set me down on the log he had been using as a bench. Carol sat next to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. I grasped her other hand and glanced at her to see she was also crying.

"I'm so sorry, Carol. I know how much you all loved him." I managed to get out. "I'm sorry I'm so upset…it's just…" I couldn't finish the sentence.

She nodded. "I know. He was kind to you. He was a good man."

Daryl returned a second later and knelt down in front of me. He held out a tin cup filled with water. "Drink." He commanded before standing straight again and striding towards his tent.

I took a big gulp, rinsing the irony taste from my mouth. I drained the whole cup in a few seconds and my stomach felt much calmer. Carol rubbed my back with one hand, grasping one of my hands in her free one.

"I can't believe this happened. We thought we were safe here. We tricked ourselves into thinking we were immune." She said sadly.

I nodded. "I was barely here over a week and I felt the same way. This place felt like a dream. And Dale…he was one of the nicest people I've ever met. Even before this messy world."

There was the sudden sound of approaching footsteps and Lori suddenly appeared, looking just as grief stricken and torn up as I felt inside and out. "Charlie, can you keep an eye on Carl. I need to…to help Rick."

"I'll do it. I'll watch him." Carol spoke up before I could. "You should sit here for a few minutes. You're still shaking a little."

I nodded, giving her the best smile I could muster. She gave my hand one last squeeze before following after Lori. When she was gone, I wrapped my arms around myself, squeezing tightly. I remembered feeling slightly like this when I lost Gabe. I was out of sorts for days. I remembered just sitting in the attic of an old house, just trying to hold myself together. Wrapping my arms around myself as if it would help keep the pieces together.

Daryl emerged from the tent a second later, a towel in one hand. He tossed it to me, motioning to my hands. "Clean yourself up."

I looked down and realized they were covered in Dale's blood. I took a deep breath and began scrubbing the red smears from my skin. It was still slick and wet and came off easily.

"I forgot how hard it was…watching someone die." I said quietly. I hadn't been around people for so long, hadn't even remotely cared about anyone's wellbeing beside my own, that I had forgot I was capable of feeling this kind of hurt.

Daryl grunted in response before dropping down on the log next to me. I snuck a glance at him. He looked weighted down in that moment, which was the way that I felt. Like the reality of everything we had been trying to shut out while on the farm was finally beginning to press in again and rest on our shoulders.

"Shouldn't have happened. Don't know what the hell that walker was doin' this close to the camp." He said finally.

I balled up the red stained towel in my hands. "Daryl…" I began hesitantly. He didn't respond so I took a breath and began again. "Daryl, where's Merle?" It was a question that had been burning in the back of my mind since the moment I had laid eyes on Daryl. I hadn't had a chance to bring it up before now, at least not without immediately getting shut down. I realized this was the first moment of peace between the two of us. I felt like I was walking on broken glass, just trying to keep it from falling to pieces.

Daryl stiffened for a moment and a braced myself, watching his mouth grow tight. A second later, though, he relaxed, letting out a breath of air. "I dunno. We lost him in Atlanta. He's alive, though. No way that bastard's dead. I just gotta find him."

I nodded. "Merle's one tough son of a gun." I said quietly.

"Guess he was shootin' his mouth off during a raid and Rick had to chain him to the roof. Went back to look for him and ain't nothin' left but his hand."

I felt my eyes widen. "He…he cut off his own hand?" I asked incredulously. "Holy shit…"

Daryl nodded and shot me a sidewise look. There was just barely a ghost of a smile on his lips. "Like you said…he's a tough son of a bitch."

I admired his hopefulness. Or maybe it was his stubbornness, refusing to believe that his brother hadn't made it. It was the same feeling I had when I thought about the last time I saw Gabe. Although my hope was slowly ebbing away with each passing day. Daryl hadn't seen his brother go down. He had even found a tiny, farfetched stretch of proof that Merle had made it off the roof alive. I had nothing. Daryl must have sensed where my mind had drifted.

"Gabe. Your lil' brother. Did he make it?" He asked.

I hesitated. I knew what I had seen, but I didn't know what I believed. I took a deep breath. "He's…I mean he was…-"

Approaching footsteps cut me off midsentence. We both looked up at the same time to see Carol had returned. She looked drained, tired. She managed a small smile when she looked at me though. "You look a little better." Carol said. "Rick, Lori, and Herschel are arranging a funeral for Dale tomorrow morning. Carl is a mess, apparently he thinks this is somehow his fault." She sighed shaking her head.

I furrowed my eyebrows together. "How? This was an accident…Carl didn't force that walker to attack Dale."

"I know that, but he's a child. I think it's easy to forget that." She said softly. "You look tired…I came to ask if you wanted to bunk in my tent tonight. I don't know how comfortable you'll feel. Sleeping in his RV. Andrea won't step foot near it right now.

I felt my chest tightened, completely having forgotten that Dale's RV had been home for the past week. She was right, I couldn't go in there. Not tonight. "Thanks, Carol. That's really nice of you." I said. I realized then how heavy my limbs felt, how the skin around my eyes felt raw from the tears. I needed to rest. I glanced over to where Daryl had been seconds ago and was surprised to see he was no longer sitting next to me. He must have gotten up in the middle of Carol and I talking and slipped off. I tried to ward off the disappointment I felt. It was the first time we had gotten along. I wasn't sure when we would have another moment like that, if ever. The circumstances of tonight had changed the dynamics of our relationship, but I had a feeling it had only been temporarily.

"Let's go. I'm exhausted." I said, standing up. Carol wrapped an arm around my shoulder and led me back to the rest of the camp. I glanced one last time over my shoulder. He still wasn't there.

* * *

Hi everyone! :D Long time, no see! Finally back from trip, which truly is bittersweet. I posted the next two chapters so I hope you enjoy them. School is about to start back up for me so I things might get a little crazy. However, I will continue to post as often as I can. I'm thinking two chapters once a week will probably be the most I can do. Hope you all understand! Happy reading!


	23. Chapter 23

**_Eighty days ago_**

_Gabe and I had seriously underestimated how bad things we were…and we had assumed they were pretty bad already. Every broken down car we passed on the side of the road, every house with its windows boarded up, every empty street littered with trash, every blood stained sidewalk sent cold chills down my spine. It was like we were walking through a nightmare. I had thought the highway would be the hardest part. The moment we set foot in the town we used to call home, though, I realized I had been wrong. So very wrong._

_This was not the home I remembered. The last time I had been here it had been a busy, bustling community. Now it was a ghost town. A few walkers lingered in the streets, dragging their feet, in search of their next meal. Broken shards of glass glittered on the sidewalks in front of busted store windows. A bicycle was still chained to a tree outside the pharmacy, as if someone had just gone inside. _

_"No one's here." Gabe said, his voice full of quiet disbelief._

_I don't know what we had been expecting. Maybe that, because it was a small town, there would still be some signs of life here. That maybe the outbreak had skipped over our home altogether. It had been stupid, really. We should have prepared ourselves for this. I think that was our first mistake. _

_"There might still be people inside hiding." I assured Gabe, although I was starting to believe that maybe we were the only two people left live in the entire state. Maybe the entire country. "Let's just keep going. Home isn't too far from here."_

_He nodded. He unsheathed the hunting knife he carried on his belt and I gripped the lucky bat he had given me all those years ago tightly in my hands. We crept through the center of town, careful to stay as hidden and silent as possible. So far there had only been a handful of walkers, which had been easy to either bypass or take down. The fact that we had seen so few, though, dug a pit in my stomach. This town had been full of people. Did most of them get out? Were they hiding, like I had said to Gabe only a few minutes ago? 'Or maybe they all turned and are just waiting for us somewhere…' I dismissed this thought and kept going. _

_Gabe froze suddenly. "Do you hear that?"_

_I stopped in my tracks, straining my ears. Sure enough, I heard something rustling in the bushes near the side of the road. We had almost made it out of the town center unscathed. I prayed that wasn't about the change. I took a step closer, lifting my weapon high over my head, ready to bring it down hard if a walker was lurking just behind the shrubbery._

_Something small and quick suddenly darted in my direction and I brought my bat down hard, letting out a yelp of surprise. The tip of the bat hit the pavement with a 'thud' and I whirled around to see a gray cat standing about five feet from Gabe, lazily waving its tail back and forth. I let out a sigh of relief and before I knew it, both Gabe and I were laughing. Laughing at the fact that I had just mistaken a cat for a walker…but mostly laughing because we were relieved it hadn't been one. _

_The cat seemed unfazed by this, blinking a few times before slinking off. We were still chuckling when it suddenly hopped onto the hood of an abandoned pick-up truck on the side of the road. A shrill, piercing alarm suddenly rang out, slicing through the silence. My heart dropped and Gabe and I had a moment where both our faces mirrored the same utter panic. Then we were racing towards the truck. _

_"I don't see the keys!" I yelled, reaching underneath the seats and checking under the visors._

_"Are there some wires we can pull? How the hell do we stop it?" Gabe shouted back. _

_I pulled myself out of the truck and when I looked around, I realized we were screwed. The streets had been nearly empty of walkers before. Now they were pouring of shops, out of cars, just out of everywhere. Two dozen at least. _

_"Gabe." I whispered, recognizing the terror in my voice. Just as Gabe turned around, a walker lunged towards us. I swung my bat down hard, meeting its head with a sickening crack._

_"We need to run!" I heard my brother shout, appearing at my side. I nodded, scanning the crowd of incoming zombies for an escape route. Instead, I found something else. Something that made the contents of my stomach writhe and my heart seemingly stop._

_"Mom."_

_Gabe furrowed his eyebrows, trying to follow my gaze. I knew he saw her too when his mouth fell open. "Oh my god."_

_There she was. Wearing that hideous neon pink sweatshirt with the flower pattern. The one I begged her not to wear in public. It was covered in blood, though. A horrible growling sound was coming from her open mouth, her eyes sunk into her skull and her skin hanging off her face in shreds._

_"Charlie! CHARLIE!" Gabe was shaking me. I forced myself to look at him. "We need to run. Climb into the bed of the truck and jump out the other side. I'll be right behind you!"_

_I felt myself nodding, trying to register his words. I couldn't stop staring at her, though. My mom. She was dead. This shouldn't be happening, none of this should have been. How was this my life? _

_I suddenly felt a pair of hands on my back, pushing me into the side of the truck. Gabe was blocking me as I finally moved, heaving myself over the edge of the truck and into the bed. I quickly crawled over to the other side and fell out onto the grass. I pulled myself to my feet and realized Gabe still hadn't followed me. My eyes went back to the truck where he was still pressed against it, surrounded by the walkers. His knife was slashing back and forth and I heard a shot ring out and realized he had pulled his gun out. Only in an emergency. Only when you felt like you might not make it. That was what we had decided._

_"Gabe!" The strangled scream escaped from my throat and tears streamed down my cheeks._

_"Go, just get out of here!" He yelled back. "Please!"_

_I took step forward, wanting to just launch myself into the crowd of walkers and tear them to pieces. The other ones had started to take notice of me though and were straggling around the truck, making swipes at me with their decaying hands. Gabe was still yelling for me to go. So I turned and I ran._

_I ran as fast as I could, aware of the sobs racking my entire body and the tears streaming into my vision. I wiped them away but didn't stop. Only when I reached the street I used to live on did I bother to slow down. The tears were still coming. I let them as I walked down the dirt road and took a right into a familiar gravel driveway. The house looked untouched. The paint was still peeling from the siding, roof shingles missing. A familiar truck sat in the driveway. I wiped my eyes again and jogged towards the front door. I knew I wasn't being careful, but I didn't care anymore. I swung it open and stepped into the quiet house._

_"Daryl!" I yelled. No answer. I yelled again. I ran through every room of the house, calling his name over and over again. He wasn't there, though. I should have known he wouldn't stick around. Why would he? Why had I allowed myself to belief that maybe, just maybe, I would find him here, waiting for me like we were still the friends we were at ten years old?_

_I stumbled back outside and made my way to the truck. The door was unlocked and I climbed inside, slamming it shut behind me. The leather on the seats was worn away, revealing the cushioning inside. I remembered riding in this thing like it was only yesterday. I remember sitting behind this wheel with Daryl next to me, smirking as I tried to figure out how to work the gas pedal. Another sob wracked my body. I locked the doors and laid down on the seat, curling myself into a tight ball. The seats smelled musky and familiar. It was little comfort, but more than anything else I had. I closed my eyes and images of that thing that had once been my mom snarling at me surfaced, Gabe surrounded by walkers screaming at me to get away. I willed myself to think about anything else, for my mind to find somewhere safe. I thought back to one of the hottest summers of July, when I shared my ice cream cone with a little boy with sandy brown hair, wearing a dirty striped tee-shirt. _


	24. Chapter 24

I hadn't been to a proper funeral since my grandfather passed away when I was twenty-four. I had witnessed more deaths in the past three months than my entire life combined, but funerals were few and far between. Hardly ever, it seemed, was there enough time to really say goodbye. I was glad Dale was being given a proper farewell. It put my mind at ease, that maybe he would be able to find peace now. My eyes stayed dry the entire time. I felt dried out inside, like there was nothing really left inside me to let out.

I was glad to see Daryl was there as well. I doubted we would get a chance to finish our conversation from the previous night, but I was just relieved we had finally had a moment of normality between the two of us, despite the horrible reason I had wound up sitting in his camp last night. Maybe there would be a chance to mend our broken friendship. Maybe it would take a long time, or maybe it wouldn't happen at all. It felt like it was entirely left up to chance.

We slowly dispersed from the burial service, until Andrea was the only one that remained. It seemed right that she have a chance to be alone there. Out of everyone, I felt like she had been the closest to him. I knew he had cared about her greatly, having told me numerous times she was important to him and I needed to give her a chance to warm up. I wondered how Dale's death would change her. She already seemed so cold and distant. Would his passing make her colder, or break her down and make it possible to reach out to her?

"We're going to let Randall go." Rick said quietly to me as we walked back towards the farmhouse. All our belongings had been taken out of the tents and were slowly being taken inside the farmhouse. Herschel had insisted we all move inside after what happened last night. Everyone, that is, except for Shane who I noticed was the only absent from Dale's funeral. It only fueled my dislike for him. I was extremely glad Herschel shared this view.

"Good. I think Dale would be happy about that." I answered.

Rick nodded. "My thoughts exactly. He was right all along. We shouldn't let ourselves have that kind of power, like we can play God with another human's life." He sighed. "Glenn and I are going to blindfold him and drive him to the next town over and let him go. Give him a fighting chance."

I didn't say so, but I felt extremely relieved at this. Dale had been so upset by the group splitting a part. Maybe this was a step at mending everyone back together. "I think that's a really honorable thing to do, Rick." I said, giving him a small smile which he returned. "And I wanted to thank you again, for letting me stay. It really means a lot to be a part of a group again. To have a home."

Rick squeezed my shoulder gently. "You're welcome, Charlie." He walked off then to join Glenn near a pick-up truck where he and Daryl had a map spread out on the hood. I was sure they were planning where to drop Randall off.

I wandered over to where Carol, Lori, and Maggie, along with her sister Beth, were gathering arms full of pillows and sleeping bags to carry into the house. I hurried to help.

"Where's everyone else?" I asked, noticing T-Dog, Herschel, Andrea and the others had disappeared.

"Clearing the field of any more walkers and mending a few of the fences." Lori answered.

I nodded, glad to hear the group was working together to make sure the farm was safe. "Carl is doing really with the lessons I'm giving him. I want to do a little more work with him today. Keep both our minds off of…everything." I said. Keeping busy, I had learned, was the best way to keep it together.

Lori nodded and smiled. "That sounds great, Charlie. Thank you."

I returned her smile and followed her into the farmhouse.

The rest of the afternoon was spent slowly moving the camp inside to Herschel's home. I think we were all grateful for the protection of his house, rather than continuing to sleep out in the open. No matter how safe we had felt before, that had changed dramatically. After Lori assured me she and Carol would finish up inside, I steered Carl to a seat on the front stoop to go over some of the lessons we had been working on. Maggie perched herself up on the railing, half listening. Beth took a seat next to me, eager to help. She had revealed to me when I had met her that she had hoped to become a Kindergarten teacher before all this. I was more than happy to share teaching Carl with her, giving her the chance to try her hand at teaching rather than never get the opportunity at all.

When the sun had begun to sink lower in the sky, Rick and Daryl approached the front step. "We're gettin' ready to head out, before it gets to be too dark." Rick announced. My eyes wandered over to where Daryl was standing next to him. If he felt my gaze on him, he didn't bother to look at me.

"Be careful out there." Maggie spoke up, her eyes mostly on Glenn. I nodded in agreement, watching as Lori came out of the house to say goodbye to her husband.

"T-Dog, you mind getting Randall from the barn?" Rick asked.

T-Dog nodded and headed off towards where the other boy was still being held hostage. It seemed mostly everyone else had gathered on the porch to see the three men off, but the fact that Shane was still missing was nagging at the back of my mind. I had only glimpsed him one time today and it had been hours ago. Even then, he barely seemed to notice me. No glares or insults. He looked distant. He looked dangerous. It made me shiver, trying to figure out what was going on in that man's head.

It must have been only minutes later that T-Dog came running from the barn, shouting. Everyone became alert instantly and I felt my pulse speed up. Again, I had the feeling something was wrong. I got up and began walking quickly in T-Dog's direction. I strained my ears, struggling to understand what he was shouting. Then it hit me. Randall was gone. Somehow he had escaped, the same way I had no doubt.

Rick began shouting orders, taking control as the leader. I was only half listening, though. If Randall really had escaped, I knew where he headed. The place I had when I made my escape. I turned abruptly and headed off in the direction of the forest. A voice in the back of my head was telling me this was a bad idea, but I pushed it aside. This was where Randall had to have gone. I didn't think twice about disappearing into the woods.

I slowed down to a walk, trying to catch my breath. I strained my ears for any sounds that were out of the ordinary. He couldn't have gone too far. Not with this fading light. I crept further and further into the woods, careful not to draw attention to myself. I had gone maybe another ten minutes when I heard grunts of pain, followed by a series of loud 'thuds'. My first instinct was that Randall had found a walker and was fighting him off. I immediately pulled my knife from my belt. I took a few steps closer and could make out a figure in the shadowy light. I knew right away it wasn't Randall, though, or a walker for that matter.

"What the hell…" I breathed. It was Shane. Bashing his own head into the trunk of a tree. Even from where I was hidden, crouched behind a trunk of a nearby tree, I could see the blood streaming down his face. He had broken his own nose. Why? Why the hell would he want to do that? The only reason I could come up with was that he truly had lost his mind. He was crazy.

Suddenly, he turned abruptly and I gasped as his eyes immediately fell on me. In one second, he had taken two enormous strides and pulled me out from my hiding place. He slammed me up against a tree, knocking the air from my lungs. His huge fists gripped my shoulders, digging painfully into my skin.

"What the hell do you think you're doin' out here?" He said in a low, dangerous tone.

He was going to kill me. I could see it in his eyes. He really had lost it. "Me? You just broke your own nose! Where's Randall? What are you doing?" I stammered. I was scared and he knew it. He was enjoying it.

"I took care of Randall." He smirked, nodding towards the ground. My eyes averted to the forest floor and a small cry escaped my lips as I spotted the boy's limp body at our feet. "I'm takin' care of everything. Rick's lost it. He ain't no good as the leader anymore. But don't your worry, I'm takin' care of it."

"You're insane! What the hell are you-" I was cut off as Shane turned me around, placed a hand on the back of my head and smashed my face into the tree trunk. I was met with an overwhelming burst of pain. My vision swam as a sunk to my knees. I could feel a warm liquid oozing down my face. I fell onto my stomach, into the dirt. I was aware of Shane's boots nudging my side before he bent down and cocked his head to look at me.

"I think its best you don't try to interfere anymore." He said quietly. With that, he stood up and left. I could hear his voice in the distance as he began crying out dramatically, no doubt putting on some sort of show. I had to get to the others. I had to warn them about Shane. My head was swimming with pain, though. I wasn't sure if I could stand. I tried and immediately sank back down onto my knees as a wave of nausea rolled off me. Instead, I began crawling. Something froze me, though. A groaning. A familiar, horrible groaning.

I looked behind me and was momentarily shocked. Randall was alive. He was pulling himself to his feet. He was walking. He was alive, but not in the same way I was. I wasn't sure how, but he had turned. Hadn't Shane killed him? And unless he'd been bitten before that there was no way he could have turned. Yet there he was and even worse, he had spotted me.

I felt my breathing speed up and it felt like I was gasping for air as I struggled to get away, half crawling, half limping to my feet. My head was throbbing, blood was dripping into my eyes and clouding my vision. Shane hadn't killed me, but this thing that was Randall would. I managed to stand and braced myself on the tree trunks, stumbling from one to the other as I moved towards the direction of the farm. My foot caught a root, though, and I went tumbling back to the ground. I breathed in the forest floor, trying to push myself to keep going. When I opened my eyes again, I was staring at a pair of black boots. At first, I assumed Shane had come back to finish me off. As I looked up though, I saw Daryl and Glenn. I actually laughed in relief as Glenn stepped forward and jammed his machete into Randall's head. He crumpled to the floor. Daryl grabbed my arm and hauled me to my feet. His blue eyes swept over my face.

"You look like shit, Asher." He commented, using my last name.

I wiped blood from my eyes. "Thanks. You have such a way with words, Dixon." I said, impressed at myself for being capable of sarcasm at the moment. I leaned back against the tree, catching my breath. "God, I'm gonna kill that asshole. I swear."

"A little too late, looks pretty dead to me. Like extremely dead." Glenn commented, pointing his machete towards the corpse on the ground.

"Not him. Shane. How the hell do you think I cracked my head open? The zombie pushed me into a tree? It was Shane. He's lost his damn mind. He killed that poor kid and now he wants to kill Rick, I think." I said.

Daryl narrowed his eyes. "Shane killed Randall? Then how did he turn?"

I shrugged. "Check him for bites, but I'm pretty sure he wasn't bit."

Glenn and Daryl kneeled down and began check Randall's chalky, deceased skin for any bite marks. They rolled him over and check the back of him, checked underneath his shirt, checked his ankles. He was clean.

"What the hell…it ain't possible. Not a bite mark on him."

"Can we do this later? We have to stop Shane from doing whatever it is he's about to do!" I urged. The pain in my head had settled into a constant, painful throb but it seemed the cut on my forehead was no longer bleeding.

Glenn nodded in agreement. "Can you run?" He asked, looking at where I was leaning up against the tree.

"I'll be fine. I'm just going to kill that bastard when we find him." I said through gritted teeth.

"Wow, did you know you can look scary as hell sometimes?" Glenn said with raised eyebrows.

"You think this is scary, you should have seen her at eight years old, pissed as all hell." Daryl smirked. "Like a blood thirsty midget."

"Okay, shut up. We need to get back to the others." I said, masking the surprise that Daryl had even brought up our childhood at all. I didn't have too much time to think about it, though, because in the next second the seriousness of the situation seemed to weigh down on all of us as we raced through the forest and back to the farm.

We made it back to the farmhouse in record time. I tried to ignore the ache in my head as I dropped down onto one of the steps.

"Did you find him?" Maggie asked, sitting next to me. "Oh my god, what happened to your head?" Beth bent next to her to get a look and immediately disappeared into the house, returning minutes later with a wet cloth and bandage. I was starting to feel like everyone was always going to be fussing over me. Why did I have the worst luck?

"Randall's a zombie." Glenn announced, ignoring Maggie's question. I assumed we'd get to that after.

"What? Did you kill the one that bit him?" Herschel asked, coming down the steps.

"He wasn't bit. No mark on him. We checked all over." Daryl said. "Make no sense."

"Shane killed him. Then he attacked me and said something about goin' after Rick. He's lost his mind, Herschel. You should have seen the look in his eyes." I said, wincing a little as Beth held the cloth to my head. "And really, you don't have to do this. It's my fault I went chasin' after him anyways."

Lori suddenly emerged from the house, looking panicked. "Carl's gone. He's not inside anymore."

More problems. Just what we needed. We had begun arranging a search party for Carl, as well as Rick and Shane when suddenly Glenn pointed out towards the field.

"I see Rick and Carl! And…holy shit…" He trailed off.

I peered out to where he was pointing and slowly realized what he was seeing. Just behind Carl and Rick was a huge herd of walkers. The biggest I had seen since I had left the city. "Oh god, someone needs to get Carl and Rick!"

"I'm on it!" T-Dog announced, running towards the RV.

"We need to use the cars to drive the herd off the farm!" Herschel shouted as everyone began readying their weapons. I could feel panic brewing, but fought it back. Lori was the only one who seemed to be embracing it and Beth led her inside the house to calm her down.

"There's too many! It won't work!" Daryl argued.

"This is my farm. I'll die here trying." Herschel shot back. No one wanted to argue with him after that. The next few minutes were absolute chaos as everyone ran to a vehicle. I stood on the steps with Herschel, prepared to drag him off the farm if it became necessary.

"How's your aim?" He asked me, raising his shotgun and picking off a walker that had crossed the fence that separated his yard from the field.

"Hopefully good enough." I replied. I had only one handgun on me, barely used. I preferred to take down walkers silently and at close range. Right now, though, I needed to learn how to be a good shot. All those days at the shooting range with Gabe needed to pay off now.

The vehicles weaved all over the farm as everyone desperately tried to drive the walkers away. I could see that it was a failed effort, though. The farm was being overrun and we needed to leave.

"Herschel, it's time to go!" I shouted at him over the gunfire. If he heard me, he chose to ignore this and continued to shoot. A second later, we watched as his barn burst into flames. I finally felt the panic rising up inside me, furious to escape. I needed to stay calm, though.

Lori and Beth emerged from the house and I raced to meet them at the front door. "You need to get out. There's a truck over there. Do you know where the keys are, Beth?" I asked the blonde girl, who looked utterly terrified. "Beth?" I repeated when she didn't answer. She seemed to snap out of it.

"Yes, it used to belong to a farmhand. The keys are always under the seat." She said.

"Then go! Take Lori. I'll find Carl and Rick!" I shouted, pushing them down the stairs. I pulled at my gun and shot a few walkers that got too close to the pair of women. From the corner of my eye I could see T-Dog, Carl, and Rick running from the burning barn towards where we were holding our ground. But where was everyone else? Mostly…where was Daryl?

A scream came from near my left and swiveled around to see a walker had latched onto Beth. I pushed past Herschel and ran towards her. Without thinking, I barreled into the zombie and tackled it to the ground. "Get in the truck!" I shouted again. I used the butt of my gun to smash it into the walker's skull over and over again. I could feel other ones closing in on me and scrambled to my feet. I realized too late that I was being backed into a corner, against one of the sheds. I fired off the last few shots I had and then realized I was screwed.

I heard more yelling and glanced towards the farmhouse to see that Herschel had left his place on the stoop and was driving off in an SUV, hopefully with some of the others inside it. I waved frantically as he drove past, but he didn't seem to see me and kept flying down the road away from the farm.

My heart was hammering. I was running out of options. Then, I heard the sweet sounds of an engine coming to my rescue. Daryl sped past the zombies crowded around me, sliding to a stop in front of me.

"What the hell are you doin'? Get on the bike, woman!" He hollered at me, firing a few shots at the walkers with his own gun. I didn't hesitate and jumped on the back of his bike, wrapping my arms around his middle. Not even a second later we were speeding off after the other cars.

I spared a glance over my shoulder to see the farm in ruins. The barn was still roaring with flames, the RV had been parked next to it and was now also smoking. A few zombies were dragging their feet up the porch. I felt my heart break for Herschel, that he was losing his home. I pressed my face into the back of Daryl's leather jacket, fighting back the tears.


	25. Chapter 25

**_Daryl_**

**_Eight years old_**

_"I still don't think yer' name's really Charlie." I said, wrinkling my nose._

_"Yeah it is. I'm not a liar." The girl said simply. Her dark hair was pulled back into a long braid. I watched as she scooped up a big handful of mud and flattened it into a pancake. _

_"It's a boy's name." I stated simply. I watched her for another second before going back to the hole I was digging. I was trying to find some worms to go fishing with. I had no idea what Charlie was doin', besides destroying her dress with mud._

_She let out a loud, annoyed sigh. "It's short for Charlotte, you dummy. But I hate Charlotte. Charlie's better." She pressed another pile of mud into a flattened pancake and added it to her pile. _

_I thought about it for a second. "Yeah, Charlotte's not as good." I agreed, nodding my head. I spotted a worm squirming around in the dirt I was digging up and pulled it out happily. I added it to the little bucket sitting in the grass next to me. "What are you doin'?" I asked curiously._

_Charlie wiped her hands on her dress, smearing dirt all down the front. It was everywhere, even a little on her face and matted into the tail of her braid. "What's it look like? I'm making mud cakes."_

_"Ew." I said, making a face. "What for? You ain't gonna eat 'em are ya?"_

_She gave me a big grin. "No. Unless you eat one. I'll do it if you do it."_

_I raised my eyebrows. She may have claimed she was a girl, but she sure didn't act like one. "Nu uh. You won't do it." I shot back at her._

_She stood and placed her hands on her hips. "I will, too. What? You scared of eating a little mud?" She bent and scooped up two of the mud patties, handing me one. "On the count of three…"_

_I took the mud cake from her hand. It was soft and mushy. I didn't know what it tasted like, but it didn't look too good. "No, you do it first. Or I won't do it all."_

_Charlie shot me a challenging look. Before she could answer, though, we both heard her mama hollering from the back door._

_"Charlotte Asher, I swear if you got that new dress covered in mud you'll be in serious trouble! Come inside!"_

_I eyed the muddy dress and gave her a grin. "You're in trouble." I stated smugly._

_She stuck her tongue out at me. "Yeah, well at least I'm not a fraidy cat." She took the mud cake in her hand and threw it at me, where it stuck to the front of my shirt in a big glob. She immediately burst into laughter._

_I stared at her, eyes wide with surprise. I glanced down at my shirt and wiped off as much as I could before throwing it right back at her, where it splattered into her hair. This only made both of us laugh harder._

_"Charlotte!" Her mama hollered again._

_Charlie sighed. "Guess I better go. Wanna play again tomorrow?"_

_"Sure." I said. It had been a long time since there were any other kids around to play with. And Merle was too old to hang out with me anymore. He wasn't that much fun anyways._

_Charlie shot me one last grin and ran off in the direction of her house. I watched her go before grabbing my bucket of worms and trudging off towards home. It wasn't really where I wanted to go right now, but I needed to get my fishing pole from the garage. I hoped I'd be able to get it without mama or daddy noticing._

_I slipped around the side of the house and ducked under the half shut garage door. My pole was leaning up against the side of the wall. It used to be Merle's, but he let me have it last summer, before he went away to juvey. I didn't really know what juvey was. Mama said it was like jail for kids. Sometimes she said if I didn't start actin' good, they'd take me there. I didn't believe her, though. I wasn't as bad as Merle._

_I had just grabbed my pole when the door the led from the house into the garage was pushed open. I froze, wondering if I had enough time to roll underneath the garage door and run away. My mama saw me, though, before I even had the chance._

_"Daryl?" She stopped, surprised to see me. Her blonde hair was piled on her head in a bun, a cigarette dangling between two fingers. "Christ, kid. You're filthy! You best not let your father see you like that. Draggin' mud all in his house."_

_I lowered my eyes to the ground. "He won't. I'm sorry, mama."_

_"That Daryl you talkin' to?" A deep voice rumbled from inside the house. My heart thudded in my chest. My eyes shot up to meet mama's eyes. "I told that damn boy he ruins one more pair of shoes, I'll-"_

_"It ain't Daryl! He must still be playin' with that neighbor girl!" She hollered back, keeping her eyes locked on me. Even if mama and I didn't get along all the time, there was one thing we felt the same about…making sure daddy never got mad. _

_I took a few steps back before quickly bending and disappearing beneath the garage door and back into the bright summer sunlight. I instantly felt relief coursing through me. I wondered if it was normal to hate comin' home. If I could, I'd live out in the woods. Merle was supposed to teach me how to hunt soon. I wandered off towards the woods behind the house. I hoped the fish were biting today._

* * *

_**Author's Note:**  
_

I know I said I'd be doing updates only once a week, I can't control myself. I needed to get some more put up lol! And just so there's no confusion, yes the flashbacks from here on out will be from Daryl's point of view. So hopefully you guys will like that! Enjoy!


	26. Chapter 26

I kept my eyes shut tightly as we sped furiously away from the farm. I had no idea where Daryl was taking us, or if he even had any idea what direction we were headed in. I just hoped whatever road we were on would lead us back to the others. More than that, I hoped the others had all made out alive.

I only opened my eyes when I felt the bike beginning to slow down. I glanced around and realized we were on the highway. It seemed as good a spot as any to wait for someone to find us. Daryl parked the bike and I slowly climbed off. I ran a hand through my tangled mess of hair, looking down the road anxiously and keeping my ears opened for the sound of an approaching engine. I could feel Daryl's gaze on me as I paced back and forth. I waited for him to say something, but he kept quiet. I finally looked at him. He was still perched on his bike, leaning back in the seat and looking at me with an irritated expression.

"What?" I asked expectantly. "What the hell could I have possibly done now?"

He shook his head and looked away from me. I should have just let it go, but I was wound up from what had just happened and too worried about the others to deal with his shitty attitude.

"No, please, go on. Enlighten me. What did I do wrong today?" I said sarcastically, placing both hands on my hips.

"You got a death wish or somethin', Charlie?" He asked finally.

I furrowed my eyebrows together, confused. "What? What the hell are you talking about?"

"I saw what you did back there…runnin' straight at that walker, basically askin' to get torn to pieces. You got yourself into a hell of a mess tryin' to save everyone else."

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I couldn't believe this. 99% of the time, the man avoided me like the plague. The other 1% he spent scolding me about not being careful. I didn't pretend to understand why.

"So what? I was supposed to just let that walker take down Lori and Beth? Lori and her unborn child?" I sputtered out.

"What about you? What would've happened if you went down, huh?" He asked angrily, climbing off his bike to stare me down. The muscles in his arms were tense, his fingers curled into tight fists at his side.

"Then I would have died! And if I would have died saving Beth or Lori, then I wouldn't have cared."

"Well maybe somebody else would have." He huffed underneath his breath, his eyes narrowed into a piercing glare.

I was instantly taken back. The angry words that had been on the tip of my tongue melted away. "What?"

Daryl shook his head again, rubbing the back of his neck. "Forget it."

I took a tentative step closer to him. I felt like the next few moments could decide what would happen next, that we were precariously balanced on the edge of a knife. We could make peace, or we could go right back to where we had been for the past ten years.

We looked at each other long and hard for one incredibly drawn out moment before he spoke again. "Just forget it, Charlie. I'm done."

And there we were, falling right back into that place where we something between enemies and strangers. I tried not to feel disappointed. "Fine." I turned my back on him and continued to pace the road, waiting.

We didn't speak as the next fifteen minutes dragged on. I could feel his eyes lingering on me as I paced back and forth impatiently. I refused to even spare half a glance in his direction, though. Finally, just as I was beginning to doubt we'd ever find anyone else, I heard the rumble of an engine headed in our direction. A second later, Herschel's SUV carrying himself, Rick, and T-Dog came into view.

"Thank God." I breathed a sigh of relief, jogging towards them with Daryl close behind me. Not even a full minute later a second SUV pulled up with Maggie, Glenn, and Carol, as well as the truck carrying Lori and Beth. Everyone was extremely relieved to see one another, but it was hard to feel happy considering what had separated us. As I looked around, I realized there was someone missing. I glanced at Rick to see he was also wearing the same puzzled expression.

"Where's Andrea?" He asked.

Everyone grew quiet. I felt my stomach turn to knots. We may not have gotten along, but would never would have wished anything bad to happen to her.

"I saw her run into the woods, as we were driving off. She might still be alive." Carol offered, wringing her hands.

"Then we gotta go find her." I heard Daryl say.

I immediately turned to disagree with this, but kept my mouth shut. Why should I be the one to stop him from doing what he wants to do?

Rick shook his head. "It's too dangerous. We have no idea where she could have went, if she's even alive still."

Daryl grunted in obvious disapproval but stayed put.

"Wait…where's Shane?" Lori asked suddenly.

I immediately looked around and realized he wasn't among us. I wasn't sure how I missed his normally agitating presence.

Rick hung his head. "I had to kill him." He said in a voice that was just barely above a whisper. "Then he turned. Carl put him down."

Everyone was silent except for Lori who let out a gasp and recoiled from her husband, unable to even look at him. She grasped Carl closer to her. I wasn't sure what she was trying to shield him from. The damage was already done. I think the rest of us quietly agreed with Rick's decision. Shane had become a threat to us all.

"He was dangerous. He tried to kill me, Lori. I had no choice." He tried to explain, looking desperate.

"He's the reason I got this." I piped up, pointing towards the gash on my forehead. "Rick's telling the truth. Shane told me he wanted to get rid of Rick."

Lori's eyes turned to look at me, still wide with shock. I couldn't tell from her expression what else she might have been feeling, whether or not she believed Rick and I. I supposed only time would tell. In the meantime, there were more pressing matters to deal with.

"I still don't understand. Neither Randall nor Shane were bit. So how did they turn?" Herschel asked. There were murmurs of agreement.

Rick was the only one who didn't seem to be pondering this. I reached out a hand and gently placed it on his shoulder, getting his attention.

"Rick…do you know something the rest of us don't?" I asked. He turned to look at me and I could see the struggle in his eyes. He knew something, but he didn't want to say what.

"We have a right to know." Glenn intervened.

Rick finally let out a sigh of defeat, running a hand through his hair. "Remember when we were at the CDC? Jenner whispered something to me, right before we got out and the place blew. He said 'we're all infected'…whatever it is, this virus, every single one of us has it. That's why the others turned after they were killed." He explained. "I didn't want to say anything because I didn't want to put that burden on you all if I didn't have to."

We're all infected. The words hung in the air. I took a deep, shaky breath. So it didn't matter whether or not I got bit. One day, whether it be tomorrow or five years from now, I would die and I would become one of those things. There was no way around it. Suddenly, everything felt more hopeless than it already did. An argument was ensuing between the others and Rick, but I didn't want to listen. I walked away to the nearest SUV and leaned against it. A moment later, Carol was at my side.

"You okay?" She asked gently.

I nodded. "Yeah, just trying to wrap my mind around the idea that were all doomed."

"We are not 'doomed', Charlie. We're still alive, aren't we? And as long as we keep fighting to stay that way then nobody is turning into anything." She said.

I let out a sigh. "You're right, I know that…But it still sucks."

I saw her nod from the corner of my eye, but nothing else was said.

I was suddenly aware of Rick's voice growing louder. "You wanna go, no one is stopping you. But if you wanna stay then this is no longer a democracy. There's another place out there for us, we just have to find it. Now let's go."

For a second no one moved. Then slowly everyone dispersed towards the vehicles. Despite disagreeing with Rick's choice to withhold what he had learned at the CDC, I didn't plan on abandoning him or the others now. I hoped everyone else felt the same way.

I watched as Daryl turned and returned to his bike, dropping down onto the seat and revving the engine. I doubted he'd ask me to join him again, and honestly, I wasn't sure if I wanted to be that close to him after the argument that had happened between us. Instead I caught up with Maggie and Glenn.

"Hey," I said, getting the younger girl's attention. "Room for one more?"

She gave me a small smile. "Hop in."

We drove in silence for what felt like hours and hours. Rick was leading the way, although I knew that he had no idea where we were going. None of us did. While I had only lived on the farm for a short time, I think the others were still coming to terms with the fact that we were all homeless now. There was nothing to go back to. I sat quietly in the backseat, gazing out the window as we passed nothing much besides acres and acres of farmland. In the front, Glenn and Maggie were holding hands over the center consul. I wanted to say something to comfort her, but I knew there was nothing I could say to make up for the fact that she had finally lost her home to this shitty new world. I could only imagine what she was feeling.

Finally, though, our convoy slowed to a stop. It was dark now and I couldn't see much outside the car window. T-Dog tapped on the glass of the passenger window and Maggie rolled it down.

"Ran outta gas. Think we're just gonna camp here tonight." He explained.

"And sleep where? In our cars?" Glenn asked.

T-Dog shrugged. "Don't think we gotta choice, man."

Sleeping in a car was better than sleeping out in the open, unprotected. I was just thankful for the fact that we had cars. I was going to say this out loud, though. There wasn't a point in making Maggie feel worse.

I opened the car door and stepped out into the cool night air. Night was the best and worst time. I loved it because of how quiet everything was. If I closed my eyes, sometimes I could temporarily trick myself into believing everything was still normal. That I was standing in my parents' backyard listening to the crickets. It was the worst, though, because none of those feelings were true no matter how badly I wanted them to be. The truth of the matter was, night hid all the dangers that the daylight showed.

I stretched my arms over my head, feeling a little cramped up from the long car ride. The others were gathered on the side of the road in a small clearing.

"What's goin' on?" I asked Carl as I joined them. I recognized him first because of the sheriff's hat that sat on his head. I hardly ever saw him without it on.

"Dad and Daryl are making a fire." He said, pointing towards where the two men were kneeling on the ground.

I nodded. "Just like we're camping." I forced a smile and placed an arm around the boy's shoulders.

A few minutes later, a small fire was roaring away in the clearing. Someone was chosen to go on watch while the rest of us sat around the fire. Carl wandered off to sit next to his mother and settled myself in between Beth and Carol. Not much was said at first. I don't think anyone really wanted to acknowledge what a terrible situation we were in. What we needed was a distraction. At least for a little while.

"My parents tried to put me in girl scouts when I was a little girl. I probably wasn't more than eight or nine years old. I remember one of the first badges we had to earn was called the campfire badge. You just had to make a fire by yourself without any lighters or fancy lighter fluid. Just matches and whatever you could find in the woods." I began, breaking the tense silence. I could feel everyone's eyes turn on me, hanging on my every word. "Well, I decided I wasn't any good at campfires or girl scouts so I poured some lighter fluid into a little plastic ziplock bag and stuffed it in my jacket pocket, thinking maybe I could sneak it out and use it if I really needed to."

Someone chuckled from across the circle, though I couldn't see who it was.

"Anyways, it leaked of course. I didn't know that right away, though. I took off my jacket and set it down next to me and was just striking match after match after match, but couldn't get one to light. I finally got one to light and I was so excited that I just held it in my hand and was yelling about it. Then it got too hot and started to burn me so I dropped it…and it landed on my jacket which promptly went up in flames." I laughed. "Then it was just chaos. Everyone was yelling, the hem of my jeans caught on fire, the scout leaders were frantic. Needless to say I was asked to resign that day." I ended, grinning widely.

"Weren't your parents mad?" Carl piped up over everyone's chuckles.

I nodded. "Oh yeah, they were furious. They had to come pick me up and the entire way home we just sat in this awkward, angry silence."

"I remember that day."

My eyes shot up and searched the circle until I found Daryl, a small smile on his lips.

"I remember," He continued. "Because as soon as you got home, you ran over to our yard and you smelled like smoke and your pant leg was singed off at the bottom. You had this crazy smile on your face, though. You were so damn proud of yourself."

I was amazed he remembered me telling him that story all those years ago. I was more amazed that he bothered to bring up the fact the he remembered at all. It felt good, that he wanted to share that moment in our past. But just as quickly as it came, the feeling passed. Someone else started to tell a story and both Daryl and I fell back into silence.

Eventually, the fire started to flicker away. Sleeping arrangements were decided and Rick and Herschel decided to take over watch together. I drifted off towards the truck Lori and Beth had been riding in. I had agreed to squeeze in and sleep in the truck, so Lori could sleep more comfortably in the back of the SUV. I spotted Daryl just a few feet in front of me and hurried to catch up with him. I tentatively touched the back of his shoulder and he turned, his eyes showing the surprise of seeing me there.

"I…um.." I began as he turned to face me. I had planned on saying I was sorry about earlier and trying to make peace, but now that just sounded stupid for some reason. Plus, I wasn't sure if I really was sorry about what had been said earlier that day.

"What? You forget how to talk?" He asked sarcastically, raising his eyebrows. He nodded towards the truck. "Remember to lock those doors. I wouldn't put it past a walker to figure out how to open a god damned door one of these days." With that, he turned and walked away, leaving me staring after him. A breeze suddenly blew past and I shivered, realizing how cold the night had gotten. I climbed inside the truck, locked the doors, and laid down on the hard leather seat.


	27. Chapter 27

**_Daryl_**

**_Ten years old_**

_The loud rumble of someone snoring echoed through the house. I peeked around the living room and could see my daddy passed out on the living room couch, beer bottle still in hand. No doubt stone cold drunk. I fought the urge to sneak up to him and take the still full beer bottle and pour it on his head. The thought brought a big grin to my face. I didn't do it, though. Wouldn't be worth the beating. Instead, I turned my back on him and slipped out the front door. Mama was still at work, which meant I was pretty much on my own for the rest of the day. I didn't mind, though. It was better that way. Less fighting. Anyways, Charlie said she'd be waitin' in the backyard for me. We were supposed to climb trees today. _

_"Runnin' off to see that girlfriend of yours, lil' brother." Merle's voice drawled from inside the garage._

_I hadn't seen him at first, but sure enough there he was, leaning back against his truck with a cigarette in his hand. He brought it to his lips and sucked in before letting out a puff of white smoke. I wrinkled my nose at the smell. It always made me feel sick. I knew I reeked of it, even though I didn't smoke. 'Cept one time when Merle let me try. I nearly couched out a lung._

_I rolled my eyes. "She ain't my girlfriend, Merle. Don't be such a dumbass." I shot back. Merle let out a loud laugh and I felt my cheeks heat up, no doubt turnin' bright red. I looked down at the ground._

_"Uh huh. Anythin' you see, kid. Why don't you skip your lil' tea party with Charlie, or whatever the hell you two do, and help your big bro fix this piece o' shit truck?" He offered, aiming a kick at the rusty frame of the pick-up. Flecks of faded red paint drifted to the ground._

_I shook my head. "Do it yourself." Before he could say anything else, or worse, come after me, I ran off in the direction of the backyard. I ran through the field that led to the small wooded area where the creek ran through. Charlie was perched on a rock, her legs folded underneath her like a pretzel._

_"'Bout time! I've been waiting here foreeeeever!" She complained. A strand of dark hair had escaped her ponytail and she impatiently tucked it behind her ear._

_I walked past her, shoving her shoulder. "Yer' a liar."_

_Charlie nearly lost her balance but her hand shot out and hit the side of the rock to keep her from tumbling to the ground. She glared at me and I laughed. "Jerk." _

_"Stop lyin' and let's start climbin' these trees. Unless yer' too scared." I taunted her._

_Her lips formed into a pout, but she pushed herself into a standing position and stomped past me into the woods. "I'm not scared, but you're still a jerk." She called over her shoulder. I knew she didn't mean it, though, 'cause a tiny smile was on her face._

_We walked a little deeper into the woods where the best climbing trees were. They were the tallest trees, but also had branches lower to the ground so we could climb up. Sometimes we could go all the way to the top of some of the trees before the branches got too weak to stand on. So far I had the record for climbing the highest. Charlie claimed she could beat it if she felt like it. I think she was a little scared, though. I didn't call her out on it, though, 'cause you ain't supposed to make girls cry._

_I had learned to climb trees when I was real little. Whenever my parents were fighting or got real mad at me, I would run out to the woods and hide in one of the trees until they forgot about me. Then I'd just sneak into my bedroom window and pretend I'd never left. Climbing trees with Charlie, though, was more fun. _

_We climbed to the almost tippy top of a big oak tree and sat down in the branches. Charlie sat a few branches underneath me, claiming she was too tired to go any further. So I climbed down a few to sit next to her. She pulled out a few pieces of candy from her pocket and handed one to me. It was bright red and wrapped in a crinkly see through wrapper. I popped into my mouth. It tasted like some sort of combination of cherry and watermelon._

_"Daryl, do you hate your house?" Charlie asked suddenly._

_"I dunno, why?" I answered, shrugging my shoulders._

_"Just wonderin'. 'Cause you never wanna go home when your mama starts callin' for you or when it starts to get dark."_

_I thought about it for a second. "I guess I hate it there. But I gotta stay there. At least till I'm old enough to leave. Like Merle. He comes and goes whenever he wants." I said, jealousy creeping into my voice. I really didn't know where Merle went when he left, but sometimes I secretly wanted him to take me with him. I hated being left behind._

_"I wish you could just come stay with me. My house isn't even fun. Gabe's always crying and crying and crying. And when's he's not doing that, he's just pooping all the time and it smells. I hate it." She complained. Her mouth had turned bright red from the candy._

_I laughed. "That's 'cause he's a baby, you idiot."_

_Charlie rolled her eyes. "Well, I can't wait till he's not a baby anymore. Is my tongue red?" She asked, sticking it out of her mouth._

_I nodded. "Yeah, looks like you drank blood." I grinned. _

_She giggled. "Yours is red too. Let's pretend we're vampires!"_

_I made a face. "No, vampires only come out at night. That doesn't make any sense."_

_"I don't care." She shrugged._

_"Besides, vampires are old. You got any more candy?" I asked hopefully._

_Charlie nodded and pulled out another handful of the delicious red candy. We ate three more pieces each before finally having a race to see who could get down to the ground fastest. And when it got dark and Charlie had to go home, I went back up the tree for just a little while longer and waited until the lights went off in my house and everybody was asleep._


	28. Chapter 28

"I hear something inside." I said quietly, crouched near the front door of an old boarded up house.

Rick nodded. "I hear it too. Sounds too big to be an animal."

"What's the plan then? Do we take the house or keep going?" I heard Glenn ask from somewhere behind me.

Rick shook his head. "We need a place to rest. I don't know if all this movin' around is good for Lori right now."

I could see the pained expression in Rick's eyes. He was worried about his wife. I think all of us were. She was looking pretty pregnant these days, and with supplies always running so low, I was always hoping we would get some sort of break soon. I don't think anyone was really ready to think about what we would do when it came to for her to have birth. The only one with any sort of medical experience at all was Herschel, and then even he was only a vet. It was a sticky situation no matter how you looked at it.

"I'll go in, take out any walkers and search the place. Make it secure." Daryl said in a gruff voice. I opened my mouth to say I would cover him, but he shot me down with a single look. "You're stayin' put. Keep an eye out for any walkers out here. Rick can cover me."

I bit my tongue back and nodded. There was no use arguing. Daryl rammed the door with his shoulder until it gave way and swung open. He lowered into a crouch and quietly disappeared inside, Rick close behind him. I kept my ears open for any indication that things were going bad. All I heard, though, were the sounds of a quick scuffle and a body dropping to the floor. Then two pairs of footsteps as the two men searched the house up and down. Finally, Rick stepped out onto the front step and nodded at me and Glenn.

"It's clear. Get the others." He said.

Glenn turned to get the others, who were waiting in the cars, while I carefully stepped over the threshold and into the house. It was old. The floors creaked with each step and the faded flowery wallpaper was peeling off the walls. I could tell that this was a place that had been abandoned long before the end of the world. I stepped into the kitchen and made a face. The walker Rick and Daryl had taken down was lying in the floor in a rotting, disgusting heap. I gingerly stepped over the corpse and joined Daryl at the kitchen window. He was holding back the shredded, moth eaten curtain as he intently surveyed the backyard.

"That thing reeks. We gotta get it outside." I said, wrinkling my nose.

"Probably don't smell too much worse than the rest of us." He muttered. I smiled wryly, though he was most likely right. None of us had had a proper shower in days. I was starting to forget what it was like to be clean again. "Backyard looks clear, though. We can drag it down the back steps."

"Let's get it over with then." I sighed, not exactly excited about the idea of putting my hands on the corpse.

Daryl turned from the window, a smirk on his lips. "What? Scared to get your hands dirty, city girl?"

I rolled my eyes. I wasn't going to take the bait, not today. Instead, I made my way over to the fallen walker and gripped it underneath its armpits. I did my best to ignore the smell, though it was strong and hitting me right in my gag reflex. God, this thing stank. "Well, come on then, Dixon."

He raised his eyebrows slightly, looking amused. I wasn't sure if he was impressed with me actually helping him, or just impressed with the fact that I hadn't puked my guts out yet. In a second, he had joined me, grabbing the walker by the feet. I grunted as we picked up its heavy body, stopping once to pry open the back door, before carefully stepping outside and down the steps. We carried it a good couple of feet away from the house, dropping it in the grass. I wiped my hands on the back of my jeans, stepping away from the body to take a breath of clean air.

"Nice work. Didn't break a nail now, did ya?"

"No." I answered shortly. I turned and made my way back towards the house. "And don't call my city girl, you redneck hick." I called over my shoulder. I heard him chuckle a little before I disappeared inside, leaving him to follow after me.

Everyone else was gathered in the living room. Lori was laying on one of the old, dusty couches. I perched on the arm of the couch, giving her a small smile. "How you feelin'?" I asked.

She shrugged. "Alright, I suppose. Shouldn't complain."

I took one of her hands on mine, trying to ignore the fact that she looked much too tired and pale to be feeling just 'alright'. Daryl appeared in the room a second later and leaned against one of the walls.

"Gonna go do some huntin' 'fore it gets too dark." He announced. "Rick, you wanna come?"

My eyes searched the room for Rick and I found him looking out through a gap in one of the boarded up living room windows. He turned back around at the sound of Daryl's voice. His eyes flickered to Lori, filled with serious concern. He let out a heavy sigh. "We need food, badly. I just don't know if I should leave Lori right now…" He trailed off. Rick crossed the room and I stood to let him take my spot next to his wife. "Someone should go, though. You shouldn't be out there alone."

"I'll do it." I piped up suddenly. I felt all eyes in the room flicker to me. Even I was surprised I had even offered. I wasn't even sure why. I think, maybe, I was just looking for an opportunity to make peace with Daryl. A good way to start was proving I was capable of handling myself. "I can do it." I said again.

Daryl snorted. "You can do what? Git both of us killed?"

"Maybe it'd be better to let Glenn or Herschel go instead, Charlie." Beth said quietly from her seat.

I placed my hands on my hips, trying to look defiant. "No, let me help. I can do this."

"You can't even hunt." Daryl drawled, appraising me with his eyes. I thought I heard a hesitant note in his voice, though, and jumped at it.

"Come on, Daryl. You know I can handle myself in the woods. Maybe I'm not the best hunter, but I sure as hell can watch your back. Trust me." I said. "Please."

Daryl narrowed his eyes a little, chewing on his lower lip. I knew he was seriously considering it. "Alright fine." He said finally. "You fuck up once, though, and you ain't gonna git another chance."

"Fine." I said nodding. "Let's go."

The next twenty minutes were spent prepping for a short hunting tip. Daryl briefed me about a hundred times on what NOT to do and how to NOT get us killed. And I tried not to look annoyed. I didn't want to give him an opportunity to change his mind before we even left the house. If we ever did. Finally, though, the hunter announced he was ready and we made our way out the backdoor and into the darkened forest. He carried his crossbow in both hands, hunting knives strapped to the belt around his waist. The light became thinner the further we went and Daryl's footsteps became lighter, his eyes alert as ever. I tried not to make a sound as I trailed close behind him. It reminded me of all the summers we spent together, playing hide and seek in the woods behind our houses. I don't think we ever once finished a game. One of us either always got too bored or just gave up.

Daryl slowed to a stop before lowering to the ground, kneeling in the brush. "We'll wait here. Somethin's bound to come by sooner or later." I followed his lead and got into a crouch. His eyes flickered over to me, eyeing the weapon in my hands. "A baseball bat, huh? I don't remember your swing ever been that good." He said casually, turning away from me to scan the area.

"It's gotten me this far." I answered quietly. "Anyways, it was Gabe's. He gave it to me when he was little." I took a deep breath. I wondered if it would ever get easier to talk about him.

Daryl nodded, pausing for a slight moment. "You never finished tellin' me what the hell happened to him."

I bit my lip. I hadn't told anyone the story about the last time Gabe and I had been together. I supposed if I was going to tell it to anyone, though, Daryl would be the right person. "I don't know." I answered honestly, my voice a little shaky. "We got overrun by about two dozen walkers. He fought 'em off to let me get away. I don't know if he's alive. Or dead." The last word weighed heavy on my tongue. I tried so hard not to think about Gabe possibly not being alive, that I hadn't realized how alien it sounded to actually say it out loud.

"I'm sorry." Daryl said gruffly, taking me by complete surprise. I looked at him with wide eyes. He avoided meeting my gaze. "From what I remember, he was a good kid."

"Thanks." I answered, my voice almost a whisper. Right then, I felt like I wanted to reach out and put my hand on his arm. I wanted to mend whatever was broken between us. I resisted, though. This was something that would take time. I was pretty sure, though, that our relationship had just taken a pretty big step back towards that place we used to be in, almost a full decade ago.

Daryl suddenly stiffened, holding up a hand to silence me. "Quiet. Somethin's comin'."

I didn't hear anything, but I shut my mouth anyways and strained my ears. Sure enough, I few seconds later I heard the distant sound of twigs cracking and foot falls. It gradually grew closer and closer, though I still had no idea what sort of creature it was and from which direction it was actually coming from.

As if he had read my mind, Daryl answered my question. "Deer." He said simply, holding up his crossbow. I held perfectly still as I watched him, taking note of the sinewy muscles of his arms as he held the weapon taut, the concentrated sweat that glistened on his skin, and the determined, focused look in his fiercely blue eyes. I felt an unexpected pull in my stomach that went as quickly as it came. I didn't have time to think about what it meant, though, as an arrow was suddenly released from the crossbow and went whizzing through the air. We only waited half a second before Daryl was up and racing towards the direction his arrow had gone. I stumbled to my feet and hurried after him, assuming he had hit the deer.

We came to a clearing and Daryl knelt down to the ground. He dabbed the ground with a finger and lifted it to reveal a red stain. "Definitely hit." He muttered, more to himself than me. "It's hurt bad. This way." He stood again and set off.

I noticed that the trees began to thin as we continued stalking our prey. Daryl was stealthier than I was, though, and kept glaring at me over his shoulder every time I stumbled or tripped. I would mumble a barely audible apology and try harder. The next time I tripped, though, I decided to hang back a little and let Daryl's lead grow. There was an animal we desperately needed hurt and struggling out there. The last thing we needed was my clumsiness freaking it out more. As I slowed down, I was aware of the distant sounds of moans. I froze, all too familiar with the sound. It sent chills up my spine. "Daryl." I whispered loudly. He was too far ahead to hear me. I debated for a minute on what to do. I knew I would most likely end up regretting my next move, but I veered off the path Daryl was making and headed towards the sounds. Better to sneak up on the walkers and take them out then vice versa.

I jogged lightly through the woods, weaving around trees and carefully watching my footing now. The light was growing brighter and I knew I was nearing the edge of the forest. In a few minutes, I was standing on the edge of a field. My mouth dropped at what I saw looming in front of me. It was enormous, all concrete and steel. It was a sore spot on the land, but it was also the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. A grin stretched the corners of my lips and I fought the urge to let out a triumphant victory yell. This was it, our big break. This could be our new home. I never thought I'd see the day when I'd be this excited about a prison.

Walkers lingered around the tall fences, both inside and out. The prison yard was filled with dozens of them, but that could be taken care of. I had to find Daryl and then we had to go get the others. I felt almost giddy at my find. I whirled around and headed right back into the forest, hoping I could find Daryl and still be able to find the prison again. I didn't have to go far, though, before I spotted Daryl with a small deer draped around his shoulders. His eyes narrowed when he caught sight of me.

"What the fuck, Charlie!" He said angrily, stomping over to me. "I turn my back on you for one minute and you just disappear? Damn it, you were supposed to stay close, not be frolickin' around in the forest like this is some god damn picnic! Ya could have-"

I brushed aside his anger effortlessly, grabbing his arm. "Be angry later, but right now you have to see this." I tugged him in the direction I had just come from before letting him go and hoping he'd follow me.

He did, but now without complaining. "What the hell is so fuckin' important? I got a god damn dead deer on my back that I really don't feel like draggin' around the entire woods."

"This is worth it. You'll see."

Minutes later, we emerged into the field and the prison came into view. I turned to catch Daryl's expression. His eyes were wide. I was pretty sure the look mirrored my own the first time I had seen the giant fortress.

"So? It's perfect. Right?" I asked excitedly.

"Charlie, you're a fuckin' god damn genius." He said. His eyes met mine and I didn't miss the small smile playing at the corners of his lips.


	29. Chapter 29

**_Daryl _**

**_Twelve Years Old_**

_I counted the days in my head. It had been almost twenty-one days since the fire. Twenty-one days since I heard the sirens wailing in front of my house. Twenty-one days since momma died. I wondered when it was going to get easier. It was still weird to come home from school only to remember she wouldn't be there, standing in front of the kitchen sink scrubbing the dishes, her straw colored hair twisted up into a messy knot on top of her head. I felt an ache radiating out from somewhere deep inside me when I thought about her. I didn't matter anymore how much she and my daddy had argued, how much she had gotten on me for gettin' into too much trouble. The point was she would never ever scold me again for getting my good shoes dirty in the creek. She would never sneak into my room late at night, cigarette in hand, and press her lips to the top of my head while she thought I was asleep. The ache grew._

_"You okay, Daryl?" Charlie asked quietly. I had almost forgotten she was there as I glanced across the lunch table at her. The peanut butter and jelly she had pulled from her bag was still sitting in the plastic baggie, untouched. She pushed it towards me. "You should eat somethin'. Have my sandwich."_

_I shook my head. "I ain't hungry."_

_She didn't look convinced, but left the sandwich sitting in front of me as she bit into an apple slice. I could tell by the way she looked at me that she felt sad about what had happened. But she was the only person who wasn't walking on eggshells around me. She still teased me, still gave me a hard time and acted like everything was gonna be okay. Even after all those horrible things I said to her the day of the fire. She still wanted to be my friend. I wondered if she knew how important that was._

_I reached for the sandwich and took a big bite into it, which caused Charlie to beam. "It's grape jelly. I keep tellin' my momma I hate grape jelly, but she forgets. So better you eat it than waste it." She said with a shrug. "Wanna catch some frogs after school today?"_

_I nodded. "Yeah, Merle found his old net in the garage and said I could have it. It'll make catchin' 'em a lot easier."_

_Charlie had opened her mouth the answer, but froze, her eyes zeroed in on something behind me. Her expression quickly turned to one of raw anger, though. "Go away, Tucker. We don't want you here."_

_I turned around in my seat to see Tucker Wilson and two of his friends standing behind me. I wasn't in the mood to deal with them today. For whatever reason, Tucker had singled me out as his biggest rival at school and was always trying to get a rise out of me so he could knock me around. Normally, Charlie and I just ignored him. Today I felt different, though._

_"I don't have to listen to you. You're just a stupid, little girl." He sneered._

_"Don't talk to her like that." I shot back at him, my eyes narrowing into a hard glare._

_"Why? You gonna make me stop?" Tucker challenged, crossing his skinny chicken arms over his chest. "By the way, how's your dead momma?"_

_I felt white hot rage suddenly surging through my body, swelling and burning in my veins. I was out of my chair in less than a second, hurtling myself at the other boy. I caught him off guard and barreled him to the ground. I slammed my fist into the side of his face, enjoying the thud of my knuckles against his cheek. I could hear Charlie yelling something in the background, but I didn't stop to listen. I just keep throwing punch after punch. Tucker struggled underneath me and finally managed to throw me off. He rolled over and grabbed the front of my shirt, landing one hit squarely in the center of my face. I felt something crack and the pain that followed was fierce. I could taste the bitter iron flavor of my blood running down my face and over my lips. When I looked up to see why Tucker had stopped, I grinned a huge grin. Charlie had him by the hair and he was howling in pain._

_I suddenly felt myself being lifted underneath my armpits by one of the teachers. She pulled me to my feet before prying Charlie off of Tucker and leading us both out of the lunch room. As I looked over my shoulder, I could see red smears of blood all over his face, as well as something else…tears. _

_"You made him cry, Charlie!" I said, looking at her with wide eyes._

_She smiled at me, looking smug. "He said something 'bout your momma. And he hurt you." She sounded proud._

_"Quiet! You two are both in serious trouble here. Do you have an idea what you did back there?" The teacher, who I now recognized as the gym teacher, Mrs. Barkly, said. "I'm going to have to call both your homes to start! Then there's probably at least a month's worth of detentions! To say I am disappointed in you both is an understatement!"_

_"But Tucker started it!" Charlie protested. I nodded in agreement, wiping the blood of my face with my sleeve. "He said somethin' real mean to Daryl."_

_"I don't doubt it, that's why he's in serious trouble as well!"_

_Charlie looked relieved to hear this as Mrs. Barkly continued to scold us. My nose was burning with excruciating pain and I was dreading the phone call to my daddy, but that didn't stop me and Charlie from exchanging grins every couple of minutes. We were led to a row of chairs just outside the principal's office and told to sit and not a move an inch. Charlie sat, swinging her legs back and forth. Her feet still didn't touch the floor. _

_"Do you think my nose is broke?" I asked her._

_"Lemme see." She said. I turned my face towards her and she looked closely at my nose, squinting her eyes a little. After a few minutes, she sat back. "No, I don't think so. It's not crooked or anything. Just bleedin' a lot."_

_"That's good. Would've been kinda cool to have a broken nose though."_

_"Yeah, then you could walk around for the rest of your life tellin' people you broke it wrestling a grizzly bear or somethin'." Charlie grinned. "_

_"Or that I broke it in a bungee jumping accident!" I added._

_"That would be a good one, too!" She said, nodding in agreement. "Man, my momma and daddy are gonna be so mad."_

_I shrugged. "Oh well, just tell 'em he was pickin' on you. Anyways, I'm the one who's gonna be in real trouble. I punched him in the face."_

_"He deserved it. What a jerk." _

_I smiled a little. There was the sound of approaching footsteps as the nurse suddenly appeared around the corner. She took one look at my face and led me into her office to clean off the blood and patch me up as best she could. Charlie asked if she could watch and trailed into the room after us. Nurse Becky confirmed, much to our dismay, that my nose wasn't broken at all. Just a big gash right between my eyes and a regular, ole nose bleed. She did say, though, that I'd probably be a little black and blue. Charlie commented that I could tell people I got into a sky diving accident for at least a day or two. We exchanged grins. Despite the fact that I knew we were both in some serious trouble, and Charlie would most likely be grounded until she was thirty, I was glad she was sitting there next to me. I knew, without a doubt, that I'd remember forever how she made Tucker Wilson cry that day._


	30. Chapter 30

"You guys weren't kidding. This place is amazing." Glenn said in awe, taking in the enormous concrete structure.

"It is perfect. We can make this work." Lori added, absentmindedly rubbing her stomach.

I felt a swell of pride that I had been the one to find our soon to be new home. Never mind that it was by complete accident and totally unintentional. The point was, I felt like I had finally done something good. Something that had earned me a permanent place among the group.

"Won't be fun clearin' out all those damn walkers, though." Daryl added.

"We'll manage. It'll take a while, but we can do it." Rick answered. He clapped a hand on my shoulder and we exchanged a smile. "This would be a good place for Lori to have the baby."

I nodded. "Place might still be full of supplies, too."

"Let's find out." Rick said. He held a pair of garden shears in his hand that we had taken from the old house we had camped out in the previous night. They easily cut through the fence and one by one we all carefully slipped through the gap. Daryl and T-Dog quickly tied the hole together with some wire, making sure the walkers couldn't follow us.

"There's another gate up there, past the prison yard." Maggie pointed out, using her other hand to shield her eyes from the sunlight. "Someone's gonna have to run through there to get to it."

"I'll do it." Glenn offered right away. "I'm the fastest."

"Or I could do it…I'm not much of a runner, though." I admitted, shrugging my shoulders.

"Yeah, and you're clumsy as shit. You'd trip over your own feet and be on the ground within ten seconds." Daryl snorted. "You ain't goin' in there."

I shot him a glare, but didn't try to argue. I knew I wasn't the best candidate for this sort of thing.

"No, I can't ask either of you to risk your lives like that. I'm gonna do it. Carl, Daryl, Carol and Herschel- I want you all in the guard towers coverin' me. The rest of you stay out here and try to distract the walkers as best you can. Lori, you close the gate behind me and chain it shut." He began handing out orders. Everyone was in motion right away, headed to their assigned task. Lori moved closer to Rick, taking his face in her hands. I turned my back to give them a private moment.

I jogged a little ways down the fence, unsheathing my knife just in case. A quick glance up towards the guard towers assured me everyone was in place. I turned and watched as Rick braced himself as Lori slowly pulled open the gate. The second it was far enough open, he was out, sprinting full force through the yard. The walkers immediately went after him. I felt my stomach leap and I realized how afraid I was for Rick.

Gunshots began to rain down from the guard towers and one by one, the walkers around him began to drop. I followed Maggie's lead and grabbed the fence, shaking it and trying to rattle it as loudly as I could. We were all yelling at the top of our lungs, our voices carrying across the prison yard. Walkers that had been straggling behind changed direction and instead came towards the fence. I waited until one was right up next to me before I jammed my knife through one of the links and into its decaying skull. I twisted the knife sharply before tugging it out. I quickly moved onto the next one, working as fast as possible.

I heard Glenn cheering and glanced up, searching the yard for Rick. He had made it and was currently slamming the other gate shut, using a thick chain to hold it in place. I watched him run to the nearest guard tower, no doubt wanting to help pick off the rest of the walkers. There were only a dozen or so left. One of them had noticed me and was stumbling towards where I stood safely behind the fence. Half its jaw was missing and thick, black blood oozed from its mouth. God, these things were disgusting. I gripped my knife tight in my hand.

"Come on, you piece of shit. Just a little bit closer." I beckoned.

It was about a foot away from where I was ready to stab the crap out of it when the walker suddenly sank to the ground. I noticed an arrow sticking out of the back of its skull.

"What the hell! That one was mine!" I yelled. I scoured both guard towers till I spotted Daryl. His smirk was evident even from where I stood. I smiled sarcastically back before proudly giving him the middle finger.

The rest of the daylight was used clearing out the other areas of the yard, taking down walkers and using the trucks to dump their bodies into a single pile at the edge of the fence. Needless to say, that by the time night finally fell, I felt more tired than I had in days. It was a happy tired, though, knowing that my energy had been spent actually doing something other than being on the road, running.

We had a fire that night and the mood was cheerful for the first time since we had left the farm. It was nice that we all felt at ease enough to relax and crack jokes. Carl asked me if I could start teaching him again once things settled down and this made me smile. I told him I had planned on it, which seemed to make him happy. I noticed one person in particular missing, though.

"Where's Daryl?" I asked curiously.

Carol smiled from next to me. "He offered to take watch so the rest of us could have a break. Why? You missin' his company already." She teased.

I felt my cheeks flush and was glad it was dark. "I don't know about that." I mumbled. "I was thinkin' he's probably hungry though."

Carol helped me fix a plate of the leftover venison and pointed me in the right direction. I could make out the old prison vehicle Daryl was keeping watch on, though it was just a shadowy shape in the distance.

"Just me!" I called out in greeting as I got closer, really not wanting to get an arrow in the face today. "Thought you might be hungry." I set the plate down on top of the car before climbing up the hood to join him.

"Thanks." He answered in his usual gruff tone.

"You're welcome. Mind if I sit for a little while?" I asked.

Daryl shrugged. "Won't bother me none."

I dropped down onto the roof of the car, dangling my legs over the side. It was quiet between us for a while, but I wasn't nearly as uncomfortable as I felt it should be. It was almost nice. Not quite the way it used to be, but maybe someday it could be.

"Remember that story I told the night after we left the farm? The one about the fire when I was a girl scout?" I asked suddenly, breaking the silence that had settled between us.

"What about it?"

It was my turn to shrug. "I don't know. I guess I was just surprised you remembered." I said, leaning back onto my hands. "That was so long ago. Another life time ago."

"I remember a lot of things from back then." He answered, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. I glanced up at him, curiosity building inside me.

"Like what?"

I watched him chew on his lower lip for a moment, the expression in his eyes somewhere far away as he tried to bring up one of the many long lost memories we used to share. "Like that time I tried to teach you how to fish." He finally said, a smirk growing at one corner of his mouth. "You were wearin' one of those ugly, frilly dresses your momma used to always dress you in."

I snorted with laughter. "Yeah, I had great style back then."

Daryl's smirk grew into a small smile as he continued. "Anyways, I was tryin' to teach ya to cast a line and you just kept whipping the pole around like you had no idea what to do. It's a damn wonder how you didn't take one of my eyes out. You kept tryin' though, but I could tell you was gettin' more and more pissed. Then, finally, you got it to cast just right, but you took yourself with it. I just remember turnin' around and seein' you falling into the lake. The look on your face when you climbed back out, all drippin' wet and covered in mud. You looked at me like it was my damn fault before just takin' off and runnin' home."

I was laughing before he had even finished, recalling that day perfectly from my memory. "God, my momma was so pissed. That was like tenth dress I ruined that summer."

"You came back out maybe twenty minutes later, wearin' some dry clothes. You didn't say nothin', just picked the pole back up and tried again. You were stubborn as hell, woman."

I grinned. "Still am."

"Things were fuckin' easy back then." He murmured. "None of this end of the world shit."

I nodded slowly, realizing, though, that I didn't know much about Daryl's life anymore. There was a thick stretch of time in his life in which I hadn't existed. I was once again struck by the feeling of much I had missed him and all the times we had spent together doing everything, and doing nothing at all. The words were on the tip of my tongue. I wanted to tell him that I had missed him, but something held me back. Most likely the worry that saying anything like that would piss him off. The last thing I wanted do here was take a giant step back towards the decade long animosity that had been built through the passage of time. It felt like that was slowly ebbing away and I didn't want to ruin any chance we had at being friends again. So I decided to keep my mouth shut.

"What the hell did you do for ten years?" I asked instead. I kept my tone light, implying I was merely curious.

I heard him sigh and was surprised when he crouched down next to me, taking a seat. "Not a god damn thing."

I perked an eyebrow. "I highly doubt that. You spent ten years doing nothing?"

"Nothin' important. Took a job at the mechanic shop in town and spent most of my time workin'. And when I wasn't workin', I was drinkin' beer and shittin' around with Merle. None of that fancy, excitin' college stuff like you, city girl." This time, he said it without the disgruntled tone, with the angst in his voice. He more or less sounded regretful for some reason.

"It's not all it's cracked up to be. Not if you take it seriously. There were about a thousand times I wanted to come home." I admitted, stealing a glance in his direction.

"Why didn't ya?" He asked quietly, his eyes still watchful of our surroundings as we talked.

I paused for a moment, thinking. "I don't know." I answered truthful. "Guess I just didn't see myself giving up that easily."

"I'm glad ya' didn't. I woulda kicked that scrawny lil ass if you dropped out. You were always too smart for that sorta shit." I liked the way he had said it, like we still would have been friends. Like we had been, even though we both knew we weren't. "What the hell you'd go to school for anyways?"

"I'm a teacher. At least I used to be anyways." I said with a sigh.

It grew quiet again. I wanted more than anything to keep talking, but I knew the conversation would eventually lead to that day we said goodbye at the end of his driveway. I didn't know if that was a talk either one of us were really looking forward to or ready to have yet. Although the ache of not knowing was growing the longer I was around him. Now that I was seeing his face every day, it was eating my alive not knowing why Daryl had pushed me out of his life ten years ago. Instead, I tried to enjoy the silence. Tried to enjoy the fact that walkers weren't trying to eat me and that the one good thing about no power meant you could see the stars for miles and miles. As I craned my neck to admire the sky, a spasm of pain rocketed down into my shoulders.

"Jesus." I muttered, rubbing my shoulder with one hand. "All that zombie killing must have fucked up my shoulder. Either that or I'm finally starting to feel old." I said.

"You ain't old yet." Daryl commented. "Just a pussy."

"Wow, you're hilarious. I forgot how god damn funny you were." I said sarcastically.

"And I forgot how much of a bitch you are." He shot back, though the humor was evident in his voice. "Let me." I heard his cross bow being set down on the car and suddenly felt his calloused hands on my shoulders.

"Seriously?" I asked, not bothering to hide my surprise.

"You see anybody else linin' up for the job?"

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever." I said, though I made no attempt to stop him. Things like this had never been a big deal when we were kids. We had been friends and that was that. Now, though, I didn't know what the hell we were supposed to be. Something between strangers and friends was my best guess. But I was suddenly very much aware of the way his hands felt, though it was nothing more than a friendly, little shoulder rub. And while I was trying to stay relaxed I couldn't ignore the heat that was creeping into my cheeks and the knots tying and untying themselves in my stomach as he hands continued to work the actual knots in my shoulders. It reminded of the fleeting jolt I had felt the other day when I was watching him hunt.

A voice suddenly cut through the silence and we both froze. Daryl's hands left my skin as he picked up his crossbow and dropped to the ground. "Yeah?" He called out to whoever was coming towards us.

As the figure continued to jog closer to us, I recognized it as T-Dog. "Rick wants us to change watch now. Figured I'd come and relieve you. Didn't know you had company, though…" He trailed off, eyeing me.

I hopped off the car and joined Daryl on the ground. "I was just droppin' some food off for him." I explained. "But I'll just…I'll just get going and stuff."

"I'll walk you to the camp." Daryl said in his southern drawl as I headed off towards the direction of the campfire in the distance.

I was both relieved and disappointed for T-Dog showing up. I didn't know which one I felt more or for what reason, which only just concerned me more. I stole a quick glance at Daryl and allowed myself to wonder, for just a tiny moment, if he felt it too.


	31. Chapter 31

**_Daryl_**

**_Fifteen Years Old_**

_I slipped the cigarette in between my lips before striking a match and lighting the tip. I inhaled and then released a cloud of white smoke into the fading light. _

_"God, that's disgusting." Charlie commented, wrinkling her nose at the smoky scent. She waved away the puff of smoke, making a point to hack out a few dramatic coughs._

_"Oh shut up, it ain't that bad." I said, cigarette dangling out of the side of my mouth._

_"Yeah, okay. Fill your lungs up with that nicotine but one day they're going to shrivel up and die." She said, eyeing the cigarette with obvious disgust._

_I rolled my eyes and removed it from my mouth, holding it instead between my fingers. "I'm sorry you feel that way, but it ain't gonna stop me." I said with a shrug._

_"You do realize you're only fifteen. Isn't that a little young to be smoking cigarettes?" Charlie asked, crossing her arms over her chest. _

_I shook my head. "Seems like an alright age to start. Hell, Merle said he started when he was twelve!"_

_Charlie let out a big sigh. "Well, Merle isn't exactly a role mode. He's too…Merle." She said making a face. I grinned a little, but I knew she was right. Merle was as about as far off from being a role model as someone could get. He went through more packs of cigarettes and cases of beer in a week than most people did in a month. Yet he claimed to be in the best shape of his life. "Where is he anyways?"_

_I shook my head, hopping up onto the back of the truck tailgate with Charlie. She swung her legs back and forth, a habit that didn't seem to die no matter how old she got. "Dunno. Truck's still here, obviously. Probably off drunk in the woods somewhere."_

_"That sounds like a very Merle thing to do."_

_I let out a laugh before taking another puff on the cigarette. "Yeah, he'll show up here sooner or later."_

_"Much much later, I hope." Charlie added. She didn't try to hide the fact that she wasn't exactly Merle's biggest fan. I tried explaining to her that he was an asshole, yeah, but he really wasn't all that bad. And for some reason, he got a kick out of Charlie. Thought she was the best damned thing since cable television. Or maybe he just knew he got on her nerves and liked that. _

_"Watcha wanna do tonight?" I asked, glancing at the small, brunette girl next to me. _

_She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't care. We could go see a movie. Or get some pizza. Or we could just sit here and do nothin'." She said, giving me crooked smile._

_"All of the above." I answered, grinning back. "Lemme grab a jacket and we can go." I stood back up, discarding the cigarette onto the gravel with a flick of my fingers. I went inside the house through the garage, turning on lights as I went. My dad was gone, which wasn't at all that surprising. He wasn't around much to begin with, but after my momma passed he spent as little time around Merle and me as possible. Which was just fine, considering he wasn't exactly fun to spend any amount of time with. He was just a drunk idiot._

_I dug through a pile of discarded clothes on my bedroom floor, pulling out an old gray colored hooded sweatshirt. I smelled it to make sure it was clean enough before pulling it on and heading back down the hallway towards the door. As I stepped out into the garage, I heard Charlie's voice. She sounded annoyed which could only mean one thing, that Merle had finally showed up. _

_"You're drunk." I heard her say as I got closer. "You smell like crap."_

_Merle was leaning on the truck, shaking with laughter. "Shit, you're fuckin' sassy as hell." He heard me coming and threw a glance over his shoulder. He grin grew. "Baby brother!" He clapped a hand onto my shoulder. "Ya' know yer' girlfriend is a bitch, but I like her anyways."_

_"How many times do I gotta tell ya, she ain't my girlfriend." I grumbled, though I could feel the blush creeping into my cheeks._

_"You're a piece of work, Merle, ya know that?" Charlie said, rolling her eyes. She hopped down off the truck and placed her hands on her hips._

_"I'll take that as a compliment." He said. I got a strong whiff of booze and realized Charlie was right. He did stink, but apparently so did I._

_"Do I smell cigarettes? I know it ain't goody two-shoes over there. You smokin' cigs now, boy?" Merle asked Daryl. "God damn, that makes me proud. You wanna beer?"_

_I shook my head and moved to stand next to Charlie. "Charlie and I are goin' into town."_

_"Alright, alright. I git' the message. Don't gotta tell me twice that you two wanna be alone." Merle's drunken smile grew even bigger._

_"Shut up and go take a shower." Charlie snapped at him._

_"God damn, you are a sassy lil' bitch. One o' these days ole Merle will grow on ya, you'll see."_

_Charlie shook her head and grabbed my arm. "Let's go before he asks to come with us." _

_I was with her on that one. Merle had taken her place sitting on the back of the tailgate, still grinning like a damn idiot. I rolled my eyes and turned to follow Charlie down the driveway, gravel crunching underneath our feet._

_"Sorry 'bout Merle." I said, once we were out of earshot._

_Charlie shrugged. "Not your fault. I don't really care that much anyways."_

_"He really ain't that bad." I repeated for what felt like the thousandth time._

_"You keep sayin' that, but I'll believe it when I see it." She said, a smile tugging at one corner of her mouth._

_I smiled back, feeling in my pockets for my pack of cigarettes. I frowned. I could have sworn I put them in my jacket pocket at some point. Must have left 'em sittin' on the truck._

_"Lookin' for these?" Charlie asked innocently, suddenly waving the slightly dented pack in front of my face. _

_"Hey! Those are mine!" I tried to swipe them, but she danced away._

_"You can have 'em back later. If I have to watch you chain smoke anymore tonight, though, I might punch you." She said. "So I'm holding them hostage."_

_I shot her a half-hearted glare. "Alright fine, keep 'em."_

_She slung an arm over my shoulder. "It's only 'cause you my friend. And because you reek of smoke." She gave me a big smile._

_I couldn't help, but smile back. _


	32. Chapter 32

"I never thought I'd see the day when I'd be fightin' so damn hard to get IN to prison." T-Dog said, shaking his head.

"Me either. This end of the world thing kinda sucks, huh?" I answered, giving him a half smile. I wiped my damp palms against my grimy jeans. In just a few minutes we'd be going inside the actual cellblock in an attempt to clear it out. The thought of being trapped inside the dismal concrete structure with who knew how many walkers made me feel like puking. I refused to back out, though, no matter how many times my stomach turned.

"You ready?" Daryl asked quietly, coming up next to me. His crossbow was strapped to his back, a long bloodstained hunting knife in his hand instead.

I nodded. "Don't worry about me, Dixon. Worry about your own ass." I said, hoping he didn't notice the slight shake to my voice.

One side of his mouth lifted in a tiny, barely noticeable smirk. "Well, ain't you all damn cocky."

Before I could come up with a clever comeback, Rick had called us all over to the gate. Maggie, Glenn, Rick, Daryl, T-Dog and I would be going inside. Everyone else was supposed to serve as yet another distraction, so we weren't the only thing the walkers were focused on.

"We make this as quick and painless as possible." Rick was saying as I approached, slowing to a stop between Daryl and Maggie. "Remember what we talked about. Use your knives, don't waste ammo. And do not break rank. We clear?" Everyone nodded, though not a word was said. "Alright then." Rick answered. He turned to the gate and slide it open before quickly stepping inside while the rest of us filed out silently behind him. A second later, Lori was chaining it shut.

I stabbed my knife into the head of a walker, taking it down instantly before moving onto the next one. We moved as a pack, careful to never turn our backs in case one of the biters snuck up. I was surprised at how well we worked together. As we moved further into the compound, though, the cried and moans of walkers grew louder. Rick peered around a corner and instantly pressed back against the wall. The rest of us followed suit. A minute later, though, walkers came around the corner, dressed head to toe in full riot gear.

"Oh shit." The words fell from my mouth before I could stop them. One came barreling towards me and I threw my hands out on front of me, shoving it backwards. It stumbled a few steps and came out me again, its yellow stained teeth scraping against the clear visor of the helmet as it tried to take a piece out of me. I grasped at the front of the helmet with one hand, trying to hold it back. Finally, I managed to maneuver my knife enough underneath the visor to jam it into the bottom part of its skull. I didn't stop to catch my breath as the next one came at me.

Blood caked my t-shirt and my hair stuck to my forehead with sweat by the time every walker was on the ground, unmoving. I felt myself instantly looking around me, making sure everyone was okay and still on their feet. I breathed a sigh of relief when I realized we had all made it. I didn't have long to enjoy that feeling, though, before we were moving inside.

Thankfully, the cellblock we had chosen was pretty much deserted aside from two or three walkers still stuck inside their cells. 'Poor bastards', I couldn't help but think. I couldn't imagine what it would have been like trapped in a cage for the past couple of months, slowly withering away and wondering what the hell was happening on the outside. It sent chills up my spine. I tried not to think about it was we moved everyone inside.

"Well? Not too bad, huh?" Rick was saying. He was smiling a little, clearly happy with our current arrangements.

"Home sweet home!" I heard Glenn chime in from somewhere down the corridor.

I smiled, not feeling any disagreement. Finding this place had been our first stroke of luck in a long time. It still didn't stop me from being creeped out, though, as I tried to choose a cell that was supposed to serve as my 'bedroom'. I made a face as I noticed a dried, crusty bloodstain on the mattress of one I peeked my head inside. It reeked like death. I moved past it, finally choosing to go up the stairs and finding one that looked almost untouched aside from a few pieces of trash and other harmless debris littering the ground.

I dropped down on the bed, suddenly feeling exhausted. I leaned back against the wall, letting out a groan. I noticed a poster of a woman in a bikini on the wall opposite the bed. I snorted with laughter. "Charming." I muttered. I didn't have the energy to take it down, though.

"Nice decorations." A voice drawled from the doorway. My stomach suddenly clenched in an all too familiar way that seemed to only happen when Daryl was around.

I rolled my eyes, sitting up to look at the lanky redneck leaning against the doorway. "Oh, shut the hell up." I retorted, although my lips were curving upwards into a smile. "I'm trying to ignore it and not think about the sex offender that used to live in here. You want it? She looks like your type."

"I ain't got a type." Daryl snorted. He walked further into the cell, examining the concrete walls and rickety metal bunk bed. I tried to ignore the growing fluttering sensation inside me as I watched him, my eyes lingering a little too long on the way his hair curled over the collar of his shirt and the lean muscles of his arms. I felt blush creeping into my cheeks and looked down at the floor as I regained my composure. There was definitely something wrong with me. "I can't believe ya'll are alright sleepin' in a god damn cage."

I raised an eyebrow, looking back up at him. "Where are you gonna sleep then?"

"I'm gonna take the perch at the end of the hall." He said, nodding in the direction of the small guard's room by where we had come in.

"Rick told me there was a dead guard in there. So enjoy that." I said teasingly with a small grin. "Anyways, this isn't a cage anymore. It's just a room."

He shrugged his shoulders. "Call it whatever the hell ya' want, I still ain't sleepin' in a damn prison cell."

"There's a bed in here. So this is where I'm sleeping." I answered simply, shrugging my shoulders. I held back a yawn, trying to ignore the fact that I felt sleep edging towards me.

Daryl must have noticed. "Rest while ya' can. Rick wants you to take over watch for Glenn in a few hours."

I nodded. "Thanks."

He lingered in the doorway and though I kept waiting for the feeling in my stomach to subside, it didn't. I was once again struck by how much I had missed him. I seemed to remember it now, better than ever, when he was right in front of me. It was like I was being forced to face head on what I had missed out on for all those years. Except now I had it back. Only it didn't feel like it would ever be enough to subside the ache I suddenly felt when I looked at him.

"Goodnight, Charlie." He finally said quietly before disappearing into the hall. I listened as his footsteps faded away before laying back onto the bed, curling up onto my side. I stared at the wall, sorting through my thoughts and trying to convince myself that I was wrong. That it all just a figment of my imagination. How in the hell else was I supposed to rationalize that Daryl Dixon was making me feel butterflies whenever I looked at him? I rolled onto my back and pressed my palms into my eyes. It felt like it could possibly be the worst thing that could be happening right now. We were finally on our way to what felt like a friendship and I was going to ruin it by whatever this was. I sighed, lowering my hands and staring into the bottom of the bunk over top of me. Best case scenario, I get over it. Worst case scenario I'm forced to spend the rest of my life, however long it maybe be, getting butterflies over someone who ten years ago had wanted nothing to do with me.

'What is wrong with me?' The thought crossed my mind again. Of all the things to be worrying about, of all the life and death situations I had been met with today and would meet every single day from here on out, this is what I was choosing to lose sleep over. It felt silly and ridiculous and I couldn't even remember the last time I had felt so incredibly stupid. I forced my eyes shut and after a few quiet minutes, I felt sleep hovering over me. Suddenly too exhausted to think, I let myself drift off.

I felt like my eyes had just closed when I was suddenly being shaken awake. My first reaction was that something was wrong. My eyes shot open as a jolt of alarm suddenly coursed through my body and I groped clumsily around the bed for my baseball bat.

"Charlie! Chill out, it's just me!" I heard Glenn's familiar voice hiss from somewhere next to the bed.

My shoulders sagged in relief and I sank back down onto the mattress. "Jesus, Glenn. You scared the shit out of me. Don't do that!" I said crossly.

"Sorry! I did try to nicely wake you up, but it didn't work…I just came to get you to switch watch with me. It's been a couple of hours." He said.

I blinked as my eyes adjusted to the darkness and finally made out his figure crouched on the concrete floor near the bed. I groaned loudly. "Already? I feel like I didn't even sleep at all."

"Really? Because I could hear you snoring from, like, five cells down." Glenn snickered. I shot out my fist and punched him in the shoulder. "Ouch!" He hissed.

"I don't snore." I muttered. I pulled myself into a sitting position, my neck aching slightly from the angle I had slept on. I ran a hand through my tangled hair before swinging my legs over the side of the bed and standing up. "Go get some sleep, I got this." I assured him.

"Here." I felt him press a flashlight into my hand. "It's pretty dark out in the corridor. Try not to trip." He said before leaving the room. I clicked on the light and followed behind him, our footsteps echoing loudly off the walls. We walked together until we reached the bottom of the staircase, where I bid Glenn goodnight as he headed off towards his own cell and I quietly disappeared out into the cool night.

The moon was huge and hung low in the middle of the sky, stars scattered around it. I found I could see perfectly with the natural light and turned off the flashlight to conserve the batteries. There was a metal folding chair placed against the wall next to the door. I dropped down into it, stretching my legs out in front of me. My gun dug uncomfortably into my hip, reminding me it was there. I readjusted the holster until I felt nothing beside the heaviness of it hanging off my belt. I sat still for a long moment, just listening. It was quiet again, which made me think about how I wouldn't hear the sounds of busy rush hour traffic or early morning construction most likely ever again. No car alarms or trains. Just silence.

I let out a sigh. The alertness I felt after Glenn woke me was slowly fading away and my eyelids started to feel heavy again. I bounced my leg up and down, hoping that if at least one part of me was constantly moving I'd have a better change of staying away. The cell block door suddenly let out a slow creak as it swung open. I froze as someone peered around the door, stopping when they saw me seated only a few steps away.

"Carol?" I asked, finally recognizing the older woman as she stepped outside. "What are you doing up?"

"I thought that was you I heard with Glenn. I don't think I've slept at all tonight. I think Daryl was right. I feel like I'm sleeping in a big cage." She said, coming towards me. I watched as she sank down to the ground, leaning back against the wall.

"It's not so bad. Or maybe I was just tired and passed right out." I said. "But then again, I did live in a college dorm room for two years which was roughly the size of these cells."

Carol let out a laugh. "I bet your room didn't have a big heavy metal door with bars, though."

I grinned. "No, but maybe it should have. It probably would have stopped me from making so many stupid decision."

"I highly doubt that." She said with another chuckle. "You seem far too sweet to have been on of those wild college kids."

I shrugged. "I wasn't really…I had my moments though." I smirked a little, recalling the bittersweet memories from the back of my mind. "I was too busy studying to get too crazy."

"You were a teacher, weren't you? Lori was tellin' me." Carol asked.

"I was. Best job in the entire world." I answered quietly. "Definitely the most underappreciated, but there's nothing really like standing in front of a room of thirty kids, knowing that they're all relying on you."

"My Sophia loved school. I never had to fight with her about getting up and going in the morning." Carol said fondly.

I had never heard her talk about her daughter before and felt a pang of sadness. There was absolutely nothing I knew of that could compare to losing a child. It seemed so completely unfair, even in a world like this. "What was she like?" I asked carefully, not sure if I was crossing any boundaries or not.

Carol was quiet for a moment before answering. "She was bright. Her teachers always told me she was so smart. And she was kind and sweet. A little quiet, but bring up dolls or books and you could get her talkin'…she was my life."

I felt the heaviness of her words weighing on my heart and placed a hand on Carol's shoulder. "I'm so sorry you lost her." I said quietly. "And I'm sorry I never got the chance to meet her."

"She would have liked you. I know she would have. She used to tell me all the time she wanted to be a teacher when she grew up." Carol placed her hand on top of mine and gave it a squeeze before letting it fall back into her lap. I withdrew my hand from her shoulder as I thought about the little girl that had meant the world to the woman sitting next to me. She had to be so strong to continue to go on every single day, missing such an important piece of herself. I allowed my thoughts to wander to Gabe for a moment. I missed him so incredibly much. I wish he could have been there with me. He would have been good for the others, with his effortless ability to make any situation seem like it would be alright. I missed that so much, that confidence and unwavering faith he had that I never did.

"Can I ask you a question?" Carol asked suddenly, interrupting my train of thought.

"Yeah, of course."

"Ever since you should up on the farm that day, I've been wonderin'. What the heck was Daryl like as a child? Because I just can't imagine that in my head."

I let out a laugh. "Yeah, I can see how it would be hard to imagine him as a kid." I filed through the memories in my head, each one bringing a smile to my face. "He was like most kids, I guess. Just more Daryl-ish. He taught me everything from how to cuss to how to drive a car." I said. "We used to get into all sorts of trouble together. We really were best friends."

"He's important to you. I can hear it in your voice." Carol said. "And I know just by the way he acts when you two are in a room together that he cares about you more than he'd probably like to admit."

I snorted with laughter. "I dunno about that. Maybe he used to, but I don't think so anymore. There's a whole nother story behind that, though."

"Oh come on, Charlie. You can't tell me you don't notice the way he's always hanging around and getting all defensive about you doing anything that might get you into trouble. He cares about you. Even if he has a hard time really showin' it."

For a brief second, I thought about the time he had gotten so angry with me at the farm for saving Beth and Lori, and about how he carried me out of the field when Dale died. And about the other night when he and I sat in the prison yard together and talked about what it had been like when we were kids. I wondered if Carol was right…or maybe I was just hoping way too much that she was. I shook my head. "I don't know, Carol. He's a hard person to read. There's just too much dirt between us. I mean, the reason we stopped being friends was because he wanted me out of his life. If he cares about me, still, then why the hell did he do that?"

I saw Carol shrug. "That's something you'll have to ask him. But sometimes people have other motives aside from the ones they put out there."

"If you would have been there to hear the things he said to me that night, I don't know if you'd be thinkin' that way." I shook my head.

"The only way to clear the air for good between the two of you is to ask him. The history between you two runs so deep that I don't think even ten years of silence could cover it up. You care about him, don't you?"

I shifted uncomfortable, recalling the butterflies I felt whenever I found myself around him. "I guess…I don't know." I answered lamely.

Carol laughed quietly. "Look, you don't have to listen to my advice. You don't have to listen to a word I say. What do I know about anything? I'm just saying…it's a damn shame to let something that happened a decade ago cause a rift with someone who clearly was so damn important to you."

I didn't say anything, instead letting the quiet settle in between the words of our conversation. Somewhere, very deep inside, a piece of me felt like there was a whole lot of truth behind what Carol was saying. All of the best memories I had from my childhood had Daryl in them. There was a reason I couldn't let go of those for all these years. For Christ sake it had taken a full on zombie apocalypse to even force us together again. Maybe it was an insult to our childhood to go on acting the way we had been. I didn't know. What I did know, though, that getting Daryl to talk about anything was like pulling teeth. It had been the way for as long as I knew him and I highly doubted that had changed dramatically. I thought back to when I was eighteen years old and standing at end of his driveway, his words biting and stinging in the worst way. Maybe there was something I had missed, like Carol suggested. That he had been trying to tell me something somewhere along the way and I had missed it. I had spent the past ten years not knowing. Maybe it was time to change that.


	33. Chapter 33

**_Daryl_**

**_Seventeen Years Old_**

_I slammed the front door behind me, rattling the glass panes of the two windows on either side. I could still hear the drunken, muffled yelling. There was a loud thud as something was thrown against the other side of the door. I fought the urge to go back inside and slam my fist against his stupid face again. Instead, I took a deep breath, turned my back and headed down the driveway. _

_The conversation replayed in my head and I kicked viciously at a rock in my path. It went spiraling off the gravel and into the overgrown grass. Why my old man even gave a shit was beyond me. He barely seemed to notice my existence for the past two years except when he was shitfaced drunk or needed someone to yell at. I tried not to be there for either of those types of moods. This time, it had been the phone that had set him off. At first anyways. I wished I had heard it first, but it was damn near impossible to hear anything from my bedroom in the basement. When I finally decided to come up the stairs and head out, he was blocking my path._

_"That damn school o' yours called. Said sumfin 'bout you quittin?" He spat at me. I tried to side step him and he shoved me back. "I ain't done talkin', son. You drop out, huh? Wanna be a loser like that damn brudder o' yours? I always knew you wouldn't amount to shit. You're nothing, -Daryl. Nothin but a-"_

_My fingers had curled into tight fists at my side and before I had thought even twice about it, I had swung a punch right into his face. He stumbled back and slammed into the wall behind him. He stared at me speechless for a moment before struggling to his feet. He pointed a finger at me, his eyes bulging in their sockets and his breath reeking of stale alcohol and too many cigarettes._

_"Ya' think hittin' me makes you a man? You still ain't shit. I should call the damn cops on your ass! You lil sunna of a bitch."_

_I thought about how good it would feel to just feel my fists collide with his face over and over again. 'Not worth it', the thought had suddenly appeared in my head. I stalked past him, grabbing my jacket from where it was draped over the kitchen chair. He still kept yelling and screaming his head off. The blood had pounded in my ears and I felt myself shaking with rage. The point was, though, I was out here and he was back there._

_I took another deep breath to clear my lungs. I had already reached Charlie's driveway. By the time I made it to the door, I was feeling about as calm as I could be. I knocked loudly. The door was thrown open almost instantly and I found myself looking into the grinning face of a little boy with dark hair that stuck up in every direction and what looked like icing all over his cheeks. _

_"Daryl! Hi! We're making cupcakes!" He shouted out at me, bouncing on his toes._

_I laughed, not being able to help myself. "Yeah, I see that. Maybe you should get some cupcake to go with all that icin' on your chin."_

_"I ate a lot. Momma says I'm cut off, but she don't know I had another when she went to the bathroom!" He whispered loudly._

_"GABE!" A familiar voice hollered before I could get in an answer. A second later Charlie was pulling the door wide open and pushing her baby brother to the side. "Are you bothering, Daryl? Shouldn't you be in the kitchen making an even bigger mess?" She asked, placing her hands on her tiny hips._

_"We was just talkin', Charlie. Geeze… you're cranky!" He muttered. He gave me one last wide smile before hurrying back off into the house._

_Charlie watched him go before rolling her eyes. She looked back at me. "Sorry, he's had too much sugar. And for some reason he's crazy about you."_

_"Why wouldn't he be? I'm like the cooler older sibling he never had." I smirked. _

_"Ha, you're hilarious. Just remember that the next time I dump him off at your house when my parents leave me to babysit him." She said with a mock glare. A smile had replaced the look in seconds, though. "Hold on, I'll be right out." She disappeared back inside the house and I turned around, dropping down onto the front step. _

_The sun was sinking lower and lower, the colors of the sky turning the purple-gray of a fresh bruise. The temperature went down with the sun, bringing on a chill that sunk deep into my skin. I pulled my jacket on as the screen door clattered open behind me. Charlie dropped down on the stoop, wordlessly handing me a cupcake that was smothered in a huge clump of chocolate frosting. _

_"Gabe decorated these all by himself. He's very proud." She said in an amused tone before taking a small bite off the top of the cupcake in her own hand. I set mine down next to me on the step, not really in the mood to eat. _

_"My dad found out 'bout me droppin' out." I said quietly. "We got into it 'gain."_

_"What happened?"_

_I shrugged my shoulders. "Nothin' different. 'Cept this time I hit him. Pretty damn hard, too."_

_Charlie's head snapped towards me, her eyes wide and the cupcake frozen halfway to her mouth. "You hit him?" She asked incredulously._

_I hung my head a little. "I ain't exactly proud of it either, Charlie."_

_"No! I mean, no I'm glad you did it! I'm not mad you hit him. God, he deserves it more than anyone!" She exclaimed, shaking her head. "I guess you shouldn't have, but at the same time he shouldn't be pushin' you around all the time."_

_"I just don't wanna git into trouble. Like Merle always does." I admitted, pushing my hair out of my eyes. _

_Charlie scoffed a little. "He won't call the cops, if that's what you're worried about. Because then you could easily get him in trouble right back. He'll just crawl right back into his miserable, drunken stupor until the next thing sets him off." She took another bite from her cupcake and chewed slowly._

_"I know, you're right." I exhaled, feeling a little better after talking about it with Charlie. I picked up the cupcake she had brought me and took a bite. It was pretty damn good._

_"I know I am too." She said in a very matter of fact tone. "You know I'm not all that happy about you droppin' out either but…I'm not gonna try and stop you or make you feel bad about it. If it's what you need to do, then I understand." She shrugged._

_"Thanks, Charlie." _

_"Just sucks you won't be at school anymore." She pouted suddenly._

_I raised an eyebrow. "What? You gonna be lonely without me or sumfin?" I smirked._

_Charlie shot me a half-hearted glare before shrugging her shoulders. "I dunno, maybe. Mostly I'm just gonna miss getting a ride home every day." _

_"I see. That's all I am to you? A ride home?" I joked._

_Charlie grinned at me. "Yeah, thought you might have figured that one out by now."_

_I shook my head. "Damn girl, you can be mean as hell sometimes." I took a bite of the cupcake. A thought suddenly popped into my head. "Ya know, I can always swing by and pick you up after work…supposed to get off 'round three at least part of the week."_

_"Damn right you can pick me up." She shot back at me. A smile played about her lips. No need to say anything else. One of the things I liked about being friends with Charlie. Didn't have to say much to know what the other one meant. We finished our cupcakes in content silence. That was the other thing about Charlie…didn't take much for her to turn any day from shitty to good in about ten minutes. And the fact that someone like that wanted to hang around a Dixon blew my damn mind every single day._


	34. Chapter 34

"I ain't wearin' this shit." Daryl exclaimed, picking up a riot helmet and dumping out what looked like brown, dirty slime. I made a face, trying not to think about what the hell it was. Rotting brain juice managed to wedge its way into my thoughts anyways.

"Why not? Scared of a little zombie germs?" I joked weakly. Secretly, I agreed full force with him. I was not putting that thing on my head. Rick and Glenn had found some old weapons and riot gear stored away near the guard's room. Most of it would prove useful and I knew it was a lucky find. Which was why we were suiting up to explore the rest of the prison. There was a hope we'd find food, weapons, and desperately needed medical supplies. Lori was getting closer and closer to delivering that baby every single day.

Daryl shot me a look before shoving the sticky helmet into my hands. "You wanna wear it? Be my fuckin' guest." I put my hands up right away, pushing it away from me. It felt to the floor with a thud and Daryl smirked at me. "That's what I thought." He said smugly.

"Alright, enough horsin' around." Rick interrupted us. "We need stay alert. We have no idea what the rest of the prison is like."

We all gathered around the table and divided up the weapons and gear. I carried my gun on my hip, as well as my hunting knife. In my hands, I carried my lucky baseball bat. Maggie had talked me into putting on one of the padded vests, although I protested at firsts. I wasn't sure what a bullet proof vest would do since zombies couldn't shoot guns. In the end, I ended up wearing it after she convinced me it would be harder for a walker to bite through. I ignored Daryl's taunting smirks, no doubt fighting the urge to open his mouth and shoot some smartass comment at me about wearing zombie germs. Plus paying too much attention to the curve of his mouth was just going to get me more and more in trouble. Instead, I focused harder on what we were about to do.

I was more nervous than I had been the day before. It would be darker deeper inside the prison. The corridors would be like a maze and I knew it would be easy to get separated and lost, especially if something were to go wrong. Glenn carried a can of spray paint to help prevent getting too turned around, though, and would mark the walls with arrows so we could get back to the cell block. When we were finally ready to go, Rick unlocked the gate and we moved silently deeper into the prison.

The quietness unnerved me. My palms were sweaty and the dampness made the bat slick in my hands. I tightened my grasp. Daryl was a few steps ahead of me, moving effortlessly through the dark. He had his crossbow held in front of him, which gave me some comfort. I knew by now that his aim was deadly and he wouldn't hesitate we got into a tight spot. The smell was rank, like mold and decay. Pieces and parts of bodies littered the floor as we picked a path through the prison and I tried not to think about what I was stepping on.

Every time we turned a corner, I could hear the spray of the paint can though it was almost hard to hear anything over the pounding of my heart. So far, though, things were going well. 'Too easy' a voice in the back of my head warned. I did my best to ignore it, but a hollowed feeling in my stomach seemed to agree. Just as the warning bells were beginning to found in my head, we turned the next corner to come face to face with a pack of hungry, ravenous walkers. The sound of their moans sent shivers down my spine. I knew I did not want to be trapped here in the dark with these things.

"Go back! Hurry!" Rick hissed.

I took a few quick steps back before turning around hustling in the opposite direction, Herschel at my side. The next turn proved to be the wrong one as well. Another group of walkers was waiting for us. My stomach dropped as I realized how bad this was. Walkers one way, walkers another. There weren't many other ways to go. I heard Rick's voice behind me and turned to follow him. The flashlight beams were bouncing off the walls and the moans and groans of the walkers mixed in with the shouting coming from our group. It seemed like a dead end around every corner. The walkers were streaming towards us from what felt like every direction. All the concrete halls began to look the same, which only made me want to panic more.

"Wait, wait, wait!" I cried, slowing down. "Where the hell are Glenn and Maggie?" My voice shook.

Daryl dropped back to grab my elbow and tug me forward. "We'll find 'em, we can't stop movin' though!" He said urgently.

We ducked around the next turn and piled into what looked like a storage closet. My breath was coming in short, ragged bursts and I struggled to control it. "We lost Glenn and Maggie." I breathed out.

"We have to find them! We need to go back!" Herschel said, sounding panicked.

T-Dog nodded in agreement. "Do you remember where you lost 'em?"

I nodded. "Right before that last turn. I looked behind me and they weren't there."

"We'll wait for it to thin out and go find 'em. I'm sure they're doin' the exact same thing we are right now." Rick assured Herschel in a strong, even tone. In that moment, I was reminded of why I admired the officer so much as a leader. He was confident and cool in the worst situations, but still refused to leave anyone behind.

We sat huddled in the tiny room for what felt like years, but I knew was only a matter of minutes. I felt Daryl's presence at my side and glanced in his direction. "Good?" He asked me quietly, his eyes boring into mine.

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm good." I said, swallowing hard.

There wasn't time for anymore, though, as Rick swung the door open and we all filed out behind him. It had quieted once again, which did little to put me at ease. I didn't care how silent it was, I knew those things were out there somewhere in this maze. Our footsteps echoed off the walls, mixing in with Herschel's hurried whispers for Glenn and Maggie. I led the way with Daryl at my side, trying to remember the exact spot where I had noticed the pair's disappearance.

We didn't get very far before Herschel's strangled cries pierced the air. I whirled around just in time to see a decrepit walker on the ground that had latched itself to the old farmer's leg. My eyes widened in horror as I realized it had torn into his calf. My heart sank. I felt like it was Dale all over again.

"Daddy!" The terrified shriek came from over my shoulder and suddenly Maggie and Glenn had appeared. I turned around and caught the horrified look on Maggie's face and thought I felt my heart physically break for her. Over her shoulder I could see walkers pouring around the corner, coming at us.

"We gotta go! Move him now!" I shouted, grabbing Maggie's arms and pulling her towards the others. They managed to get Herschel up and started half carrying him, and half dragging him, down the hall. Rick was shouting Daryl's name and through the chaos I watched him take down at least three or four walkers with his crossbow as we all desperately scrambled for safety.

Maggie and I pushed ahead of the group and spotted a door at the end of the hallway. It was handcuffed shut. I hammered on it desperately with my fists, yelling to the others that it was a dead end. Glenn was at my side not even a full second later, snipping the metal cuffs off with a giant pair of shears. We rammed the door open together, spilling inside. The doors slammed shut behind us as T-Dog leaned against it, keeping the hungry walkers outside at bay. A quick glance around the room told me we were in a cafeteria. More importantly, we were safe. At least for now, but there was no time to catch our breath. Herschel was on the concrete floor, crying out in pain. The sound was almost unbearable. Maggie held her father's head in her lap, tears streaming down her dirt stained face. My eyes traveled down to the gaping wound on the man's leg, where a bite sized chunk of flesh had been removed. Blood streamed out relentlessly.

"What'd we do?" I heard Glenn yell over the chaos.

I glanced at Rick and saw the determination in his eyes. He wasn't going to let this man die. He handed me the flashlight, asking me to hold it steady over the bite while he made a tourniquet around Herschel's leg. I had an idea of what was about to happen, but held my ground. Seconds were ticking away and each one that passed diminished Herschel's chances of staying alive. I grit my teeth, struggling to keep my shaking hands steady as Rick suddenly pulled out the ax and started hacking off the leg just above the bite.

The sound of breaking bone turned my stomach and my mouth started to taste like acid. I pushed the feeling aside as best I could. I had to keep it together, for Herschel. His screaming amplified for a few minutes before dying away completely. My head snapped to his face to see his eyes shut, mouth slack. For a terrifying second, I thought he had died. That the pain and blood loss had been too much. Maggie caught my eye.

"He's still breathing! He's alive! Just out cold!" Her voice shook with relief.

"We can't stay here, we need to get him back to the cell block." Daryl said.

"There's a food cart over there! We can use it as a stretcher and wheel him back." I suggested, nodding towards a metal cart in the corner. Glenn shot up and hurried to get it. I peeled off the heavy riot vest and pulled my jacket off, pressing it Herschel's stump in a desperate attempt to stop the bleeding. It was soaked through in minutes.

We worked as quickly as possible and in a matter of seconds, Herschel was on the cart and we were wheeling him back through the walker infested halls. Daryl jogged ahead of us, taking down the geeks and clearing a path. I hung back with the others, keeping my hands pressed on the bleeding stump. In my head, I was desperately pleading for him to live. He had to live, if not for himself then for his two girls. Maggie and Beth would be so broken.

When we made it back to the cellblock, the first thing I noticed was the utterly devastated, crumpled look in Beth's face. I fell back as Herschel was rushed into a cell, watching from the door as Carol began taking control. I wondered for a brief second if she had been a nurse or if she just knew these things. Either way, I knew I would be more in the way then helpful at this point. Plus, I couldn't take looking at Beth and Maggie's faces as they watched their daddy fade away.

I walked back to the main room and slumped onto one of the metal tables. God, why was everything always so unfair? Why was it always the good ones? In the past three months, I had seen more death and destruction than anyone needed to see. I had seen the people I cared about die. I had lost everything. Did anything good ever happen anymore? I felt deflated and hollowed inside and for the first time in months, I thought I might cry. I wanted to cry for those two kind, beautiful girls who were watching their strong, caring father cling to life in the next room. I wanted to cry for Carol who had lost her daughter, for Lori and that perfect baby that was going to be born into this hellish world and would never know what it was like to feel safe.

"Charlie?" I recognized the southern drawl that tugged at my heartstrings, but felt too defeated to look up. I heard him set down his crossbow on the table before he crouched in front of me. "Ya alright, girl?"

I finally glanced up and was surprised to see him looking at me with more concern than I had seen since we were teenagers. I shrugged. "If that man dies…" I trailed off. It was quiet a moment before I continued. "Daryl, that baby is never gonna know what it's like to be a kid. It's never gonna play in the creek and catch frogs like we did, or go to the zoo, or eat ice cream on the front porch. All it's gonna know is running, hiding, and death. That's not fair."

"Hey, don't you go sayin' all that shit. Damn it, Charlie, you ain't weak like that." Daryl said heatedly. "Lori's baby is gon' be fine. Ya know why? 'Cause it's gonna have a momma and daddy that care about it, and it's gonna have all these other people here lookin' after it. Which is more than most people ever had, includin' me. That kid is gonna be better than alright." He continued. "And Herschel, that son ova bitch is tough as nails. But even if he don't make it, we'll be fine 'cause we gotta be fine. So you best stop you're damn mopin' 'cause you ain't shuttin' down on me. You hear me, woman?" He asked.

He was right and I knew that. It was hard to miss that hard look in his eyes and the note of finality in his voice that made it clear I wasn't allowed to sink. It was one I recognized and knew well from years earlier. He looked at me like he knew I was tougher than I thought I was. I needed that right now. I nodded slowly. "Loud and clear." I answered with a weak smile.

"That's what I thought." He said quietly with a small nod.

As we sat there, I was suddenly struck hard by the longing I felt for him to close the space between us and pull me into his arms. He made to stand up, but hesitated and I wondered for a split second if maybe he also felt that invisible current that seemed to be charging the air between us. My eyes raked over his face, taking in the lines that hadn't been there ten years earlier and the stubble on his chin. It was hard to read his expression and not for the first time I wondered what was going through his head. He suddenly cleared his throat though and the moment passed as he stood to his feet.

"I'll go check on Herschel." He muttered before walking away.

I stared after him, feeling a little off balance. For years I had thought I'd been sure about Daryl and the place he stood in my life. Now, though, everything felt like it was out of my control. But in that moment, I would have liked nothing more than to press my lips against the man who had been my childhood best friend. It was a feeling. Good or bad, I didn't know. But in that nanosecond of a time, I could have sworn he felt it too.

* * *

It has been two weeks too long, my friends. I'm sorry I kept you all waiting, but I'm pretty much buried in school work. Ugh. Anyways, I'm still gonna keep writing when I can but posting probably will be fewer and farther between. Start expecting every other week, but I'll try to get it in sooner if I can. Thank you all so much for all the kind reviews and messages! It makes me so happy this many people have reached out to me about how much they love my writing and Charlie and Daryl's story. Really blows my mind! :D So thank you again! You all rock!

Also...I've had a few people mention some things about the flashbacks to me. There have been suggestions to make them fewer and farther between to keep readers interested and stop them from skipping over. The flashbacks are so important though! There's a reason I include them and make them every other chapter...you will learn things about Charlie, Daryl, and their relationship that aren't really mentioned in present day. By skipping a flashback, you may be skipping a whole lot of stuff you might not find out about otherwise. So this is why I do so many and stress the importance of reading them. One of these days, there won't be any more flashbacks and it will all be present day, but we still have a ways to go. Until then stick with it! I can tell you...both Charlie and Daryl have some interesting stuff going on in the flashbacks. Especially Daryl. Just you wait... :D


	35. Chapter 35

**_Daryl_**

**_19 Years Old_**

****_It was one of the first clear nights in days. The clouds had cleared up and the moon shone fiercely bright in the star speckled sky. I picked my way through the weeds in the field behind the house before heading into the trees. The flashlight beam was dim, but good enough to keep me from tripping over tree roots and rocks. It was a short walk anyways and in a matter of minutes, I could see the firelight coming from a clearing through the trees._

_"Where the hell you been? We was startin' to think you was to pussy to come out and play in the dark." Merle called from across the fire. He sat in a rusted old lawn chair, grinning like an idiot. A few of his buddies from work sat around as well, all with cans of beer in hand._

_I rolled my eyes and set the case of beer down at his feet. "That enough?" I asked._

_He shrugged his shoulders. "It never is, but it'll do for now. Come on, crack open a beer with your big bro." He said, crushing the empty one in his hand before opening the new case and tossing a can at me._

_I sat down on a log, stretching my long legs out in front of me. I popped open the beer tab and took a long swig of the bitter tasting liquid._

_"Hey, where's that neighbor chick, Daryl?" One of Merle's friends, Bobby, called out to me. He was lanky and thin with a greasy mop of blonde hair. Most of Merle's friends were just like Merle, aside from a few exceptions. I got on with most of them alright, though. _

_"How the hell am I supposed to know?" I answered as casually as possible. I hadn't invited Charlie with me for a reason, and that one being I didn't know how well Merle and buds would behave around her. The last thing I wanted was them harassing her like they did the last time she tagged along._

_"That's a damn shame. I was hopin' to get a glimpse of that fine piece of ass tonight." Trent, another one of Merle's pals, added._

_I felt my cheeks flush a little, feeling a tiny spark of anger igniting somewhere inside me. I hated when they talked about her. They could say whatever the hell they wanted about any other chick in town, but not Charlie. I didn't say anything, hoping the talk would die down soon enough and they'd move on to the next drunken topic. I took another sip from my beer._

_"You think she puts out?" Bobby asked with a cackle._

_"Shut your god damned mouth!" I spat out before I could stop myself. Bobby whipped his head to look at me, a toothy grin on his face._

_"Hey, man…I didn't mean nothin'. Just wonderin' out loud. Thought she wasn't your girl anyways?"_

_"She ain't." I mumbled, squeezing the can a little too tight in my hands and denting the sides._

_"He says she ain't, but he sure gets his panties in a bunch whenever her name comes up, don't he?" Merle added, hooting with laughter._

_"Now you fellas wouldn't happen to be talkin' about me, would ya?" Charlie's voice suddenly called out. My eyes shot up to see her emerging from the tree line, flashlight in hand and an army green colored jacket hugging her slender frame._

_"As a matter of fact, honey, we was." Merle smirked. "Come to keep us company?"_

_I tried to ignore the way Bobby and Trent's eyes roamed Charlie's figure appreciatively as she made her way over to me, plopping down on the log. She gave me a smile. "Saw your flashlight from the kitchen window and figured I'd come see what you all were up to. Hope I'm not interrupting anything?" She asked, eyes flickering around the circle of Merle and his friends._

_"Not at all." Bobby said._

_"You wanna beer, princess?" Merle asked, nodding towards the case at his feet._

_"Nah, I don't wanna reek of booze when I get home." She said, wrinkling her nose._

_"I see…you too good to drink some beer with Merle and his boys?" My brother taunted, a smile stretching his lips. Charlie rolled her eyes before holding out a hand for Merle to pass her a cold can, which he gleefully did. For reasons I still could not understand, Charlie and Merle were getting on better than they had in years. Hell, they even joked and teased with each other! By no means were they friends, Charlie made that clear, but she hardly ever complained about him anymore. Least not to me._

_"You sure? You don't gotta drink that." I said to her quietly._

_"It's fine. One won't hurt anything. Anyways, I get too tipsy and you can walk me home." She grinned, elbowing my side playfully._

_I felt that familiar tug in my stomach I'd been feelin' for a while now, which usually happened whenever I looked at her too long now or when she got to teasin' me. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. She sure had grown up real pretty, though._

_"So what's on the agenda for tonight, boys?" She asked, opening the beer and taking a long sip. "In what ways were ya'll plannin' on getting arrested tonight?"_

_"We're trynna stay outta trouble tonight. Bobby's on parole." Merle grinned. He polished off yet another beer before cracking open another one right away._

_"Unless that something is gettin' frisky with a minor." Trent said in a low voice, no doubt trying to be just barely heard. _

_"What the hell did you just say?" I asked slowly._

_"How old are you anyways, sweetheart? Sixteen?" He said louder, this time direction his voice towards Charlie, who sat rigid in her seat, looking like she wanted to jump across the fire and throttle Trent to death._

_"You best watch yourself or swear to God I'll punch that god damn smirk right off your fuckin' face." I threatened, standing to my feet. My fists were clenched tight at my sides and I could have sworn I literally felt my blood boiling underneath my skin. _

_"Hey now, stand down little brother. You don't wanna go makin' threats you can't deliver now, do ya?" Merle said loudly, raising his eyebrows. He looked back at Trent. "You best shut your god damn trap, you idiot. People might start noticin' yer just as stupid as ya look."_

_I shook my head, the venom still coursing through me. I yanked Charlie up by her hand and pulled her away from the fire and back into the woods. I could hear Merle hollering after us, but I didn't care much to listen. We walked quietly all the way back to the field, finally emerging back into the moonlit open space._

_"I could have handled it." Charlie said quietly as I turned to look at her. She still had the beer can in her hand._

_"I know, you're tougher than most people. I just…those idiot don't need to be talkin' bout you like that. It ain't right." I said, shaking my head. "Fuckin' pricks."_

_I felt Charlie's hand on my arm and I glanced up at her to see a tiny smile on her lips. "Well thanks. Really. You don't have to stand up for me. I thought you were about to fight that asshole."_

_I felt my lips tug upwards. "I might have. Or I suppose I could've let you do it. You looked about ready to tear him a part."_

_Charlie laughed. "Not gonna lie, I thought about it for a second."_

_I let out a laugh. "You would've kicked his scrawny redneck ass, too." I said, shaking my head. I motioned towards my house with a nod of my head. "Come on, we can go sit on the front porch."_

_"I do have a half a beer we could split." She said, holding out the can in her hand. _

_I laughed a little harder as she followed me around the yard, her footsteps trailing softly through the grass next to mine._


	36. Chapter 36

It was the waiting game that was the worst. The awful feeling of not knowing what was going to happen. Of whether or not Herschel would ever open his eyes again and look at his two daughters. Both had been sitting vigilantly by his bedside for hours, holding his hands and talking soothingly to him. I leaned against the wall, listening as Maggie shared story after story of times they had shared with their father. Still, I had also listened when Maggie tried to get Beth ready to accept the fact that Herschel might never wake up again. It was like his life was balanced on the edge of knife. It could so easily go one way or the other.

Carol had tried to get me to rest, but I wanted to be there with Beth and Maggie in case anything happened. Good or bad. The time continued to trickle past, like the grains of sand in an hour glass. I was vaguely aware of Daryl announcing he was taking watch outside, but I still didn't move. My legs felt cramped from standing and my eyes were growing heavy. I was getting ready to find a place to sit down when Beth suddenly gasped. I froze.

"Oh my god." I heard Maggie's voice, a breathless whisper.

I leaned forward, and sure enough, the older man's eyes were fluttering open. A huge smile spread across my lips. I wrapped an arm around Beth's shoulder, squeezing the girl tightly. "He's waking up!" I said, shaking my head in a state of happy disbelief. "I'll go get Carol!" I turned and ran out into the hall, hurrying into the common area where everyone else had been seated quietly.

"He's awake!" I announced happily, unable to control the smile on my lips. "Herschel opened his eyes!"

Everyone was on their feet in seconds. Carl ran up to me and wrapped his small arms around my middle, grinning up at me with the same relief I was feeling spread throughout my entire body. "Where's Daryl?" I asked. "I want to tell him Herschel's awake!"

"Outside on watch still. I'm gonna go see Herschel!" The little boy said before hurrying off after the others.

I knew I shouldn't be getting my hopes this high yet, because Herschel was not out of danger yet. There were still so many things that could go wrong. Infections, blood loss, the list went on. Yet, against all odds, the man had woken up. He had gotten bit by a walker, had his leg amputated, and had woken up and was alive. It felt like something to be happy about. I moved towards the door to the cell yard and heaved it open before disappearing out into the cool night air.

The moon was hung high in the sky, as bright as ever. I glanced towards the chair next to the door to see that it was empty. He must have been making rounds throughout the yard. I took a deep breath of the clear air, filling my lungs as I walked towards the fence. I could make out a few straggling walkers on the outside of the farthest perimeter fence, dragging their feet while their arms hung loosely at their sides.

I laced my fingers through the fence, looking out across the field. It was a perfect night again. Not a cloud in the sky. I could see the stars for miles. Not for the first time, I was reminded of home. Daryl and I had spent countless night sitting at the end of his drive way on the back of his truck, taking in the country night sky. I was glad I still had memories like that now. Daryl had been right earlier, talking me out of my downwards spiral. I couldn't let myself give up. Not when there were still so many good things that were possible. Herschel waking up had proved that. It made me wish, for what felt like the thousandth time, that Daryl and I had never stopped being friends. I could have used his optimism, his strong attitude so many times.

I thought about the way he had looked at me earlier. Or maybe it was just the way I thought he had been looking at me. I could have sworn, on anything, that he had felt what I did, too. That strong, electric current. I still didn't fully understand it myself. Somewhere along the line, I had started looking at Daryl in a way that made it clear I saw him as more than just that little boy I used to catch tadpoles with.

"Shouldn't yer ass be inside?" Daryl asked, suddenly appearing at my side.

"Heschel woke up." I said right away.

"Yer shittin' me." He said, but a small smile had lifted one corner of his mouth. "I'll be damned. I told you he was a tough son ova bitch, didn't I?"

I nodded. "You were right."

"Don't hear that too often." He said, giving me a smirk and his incredibly blue eyes lighting up.

I smiled back as the silence once more settled in between us. I gave him a sidewise glance. I caught myself, for the second time that day, wondering how it would feel to kiss him. How it would feel to press myself against him and feel his arms encircle me. I looked away, feeling the blush creep into my cheeks. God, had he always been so handsome? Had these feelings always been there, just never clear enough for me to notice? There was so much lost time to make up for. I thought about what Carol had said the night before. It would be a damn shame to let something that happened ten years ago keep that rift between us wide open, especially when now all I wanted to do was be close to him. If I ever wanted to know why he had been so adamant about wanting me out of his life, or if he still cared about me at all, I would have to cross that rift and hope to God I made it to the other side. I wavered for a moment before deciding what I needed to do. It was time to be brave.

I felt my breath catch in my throat and the words were tumbling out before I could stop them. "Daryl, do you think things would have been different if we had stayed friends?" I asked quietly. The words hung in the air between us and I almost wished I hadn't said them. The smile on his lips vanished, his expression instantly shutting down as the light in his eyes dimmed.

"Not now, Charlie." He said in a low voice. "We ain't talkin' about this right now."

I drew back into myself a little before taking a deep breath and charging forward. "Well when the hell are we gonna talk about it? You were my best friend, Daryl!" I pleaded with him. "Do you know how hard it was for me? Trying to pretend that you never existed? And now, here we are again and I'm so damn tired of avoiding what happened. Our past is there, and we can't ignore it. It's what makes being around you so incredible and so damn hard at the same time. Hell, sometimes you still look at me like you're seeing that little girl that lived next door, and other times it's like you shut down completely and can't stand to even be around me. And I know it's because of what happened that night I left for Atlanta. It changed everything and we both know that." I continued. I felt something open up inside me and the anger and hurt I had crammed somewhere inside me was suddenly rushing through my veins and fueling my words. "So when the hell are you going to tell me why you decided to push me out of your life forever? What the hell did I do to deserve that, huh?" My voice was shaking by the time I finished and I could feel tears brewing behind my eyes. I blinked rapidly. I wouldn't cry, not now. I scanned Daryl's face desperately, trying to read what was there.

"I said we ain't talkin' about this!" He repeated slowly. His voice was distant, though I could have sworn I heard some note of hesitation in there. I jumped at it, clinging to the possibility that I might just break him down enough to talk to me.

"So that's it then? That's all I get? Years of friendship and this is it?" I said angrily, shaking my head. "Don't you think it's some kind of damn miracle that it was me you found in those woods that day? Somehow, against all fucking odds, we ended up right back together." I waited a long minute for him to say something, anything, but he stayed stony and silent. I shook my head again. "Fine then. Whatever you want, Daryl." I started to turn my back on him then, ready to walk away. The unexpected sound of his voice stopped me.

"You shouldn't have left." His voice was almost a whisper, hard to hear.

I furrowed my eyebrows together. It wasn't what I had expected him to say at all and it momentarily caught me off guard. It only took a few second, though, before I gathered my anger back together. "What the hell was I supposed to do? Put my entire life on hold because you couldn't deal with me being gone?" I asked incredulously. "God damn it, Daryl! You are the most selfish person I've ever met! And by the way, I might have left but I did come back for you! I came looking for you after the world went to complete shit because I couldn't deal with not knowing if you were okay. So maybe, yeah, I came back ten years too late but you never should have pushed me out in the first place!" By now I was shouting, but I didn't care if every walker heard me. I was finally getting to say everything I had been wanting to for the past decade, but never had the chance too.

I could tell he was getting angry, too, by the way his hands balled up into fists and the way his eyes narrowed and his mouth was slit into one hard, thin line. "What the hell was I supposed to do? Beg ya' to stay? You would've gone either way!" Daryl shot back. He look away for a second, agitatedly running both hands through his hair. When he finally looked back at me, his eyes were blazing with an intensity I had never seen before. "Don't you think I spent the last ten years thinkin' about you every damn day? God damn it, Charlie, do you not fuckin' get it! I loved you!"

The silence was heavy as it suddenly fell between us. It felt like time had suddenly stopped as I stared at him, eyes wide. My mouth felt dry as I struggled to come to terms with what had just come out of Daryl Dixon's mouth. It was the last thing I had ever expected to hear from him. Not now, not ever. It stirred within me all the feelings I had been so desperate to understand. He looked just as shocked as I felt, frozen still with a look of utter terror etched onto his face.

"What the hell did you just say?" I asked slowly, taking a tentative step towards him. It felt like it was impossible not to hear my heart hammering away in my chest while my stomach flip flopped uncontrollably. He said he loved me. The words replayed over and over in my head. He had said the god damned 'L' word.

He shifted uncomfortably, averting his eyes. "It was nothin'. Forget it." He said quietly. "I'm gonna go check on Herschel."

He made a move to walk away. "No, don't walk away. We're talking about what the fuck just came out of your mouth." I said. He didn't stop, though, and I reached out to grab his arm as he tried to side step around me. I tugged him to a stop. "Don't walk away from me." I repeated.

It took a long second before he finally looked at me. I could read the uncertainty behind his eyes, the fear of what he had just admitted evident all over his face. I was very much aware of my racing pulse, beating rapidly beneath my skin. We were so close, I could smell his familiar sweet, musky scent I had grown accustom to all those years ago. I suddenly realized that he was just as aware of what was happening between us as I was. That I wasn't alone in feeling that damn, dangerous magnetic tug that had been drawing us closer together no matter how hard we tried to shrug it off. I suddenly understood better than ever why his eyes followed me around a room full of people, why he was always badgering me about putting myself in danger, why he felt a constant need to hover over me protectively, even if it drove him crazy not completely understanding why himself. I took a chance, betting on all those feelings. I hesitated for a moment before allowing my grasp on his arm to loosen, sliding my hands down over his wrist until I found his hand and intertwined my fingers with his own.

"What're you doin, girl?" He asked in a low, husky tone. He didn't pull away though.

Without thinking twice about it, I crept up onto my tippy toes and brushed my lips against his own, breathing in the sweetness of his scent. His lips were soft and warm, as close to the way I imagined them as they could be. He stiffened, his body freezing like a statue at the sudden closeness. I waited a moment to see if he would relax before reluctantly pulling away. I felt something inside me puncture and fall away. His eyes slowly opened and I searched his expression, desperate for some kind of assurance that I hadn't been wrong, that he had wanted that kiss just as badly as I had. I finally gave up, though. I gave him a small, sad smile before dropping his hand from my grasp and pulling away. I turned around and headed back towards the prison, my footsteps heavy with defeat.

I hadn't gone very far, though, when I heard his footsteps following after me. Before I even had the chance to turn my head, I felt his hand grasp my arm as he yanked me around to face him. My breath caught in my throat as his lips suddenly pressed hard against my own. His arms encircled my waist as he pulled me into him, closing any remaining space that had been between us. I felt my head spinning, my heart beating fast and slow at the same time as our lips moved desperately against one another's. I wrapped my arms around his neck, his tongue teasingly gliding across my lower lip. I felt hyperaware of everything that was happening; the way his muscles felt beneath the thin fabric of shirt as he pressed up against me, the salty taste of his lips, the way his hands gripped my waist, and his fingertips just barely grazed the small stretch of bare skin between my shirt and jeans. His kiss was hungry and his touch sent pleasant shivers coursing down my spine and spreading throughout my entire body until I felt like I was on fire. I knew I would never be able to get enough.

As quickly as it had started, though, it ended, leaving my lips sore and aching for more. He reluctantly pulled away, our breaths mingling as we both tried to regain composure. I waited for my pulse to slow as I felt him absentmindedly toying with the hem of my tee-shirt.

"We can't do this, Charlie." He suddenly said quietly.

I felt myself go rigid. His hands left my waist, falling back to his sides. I felt like the rug had been swept out from under my feet. It made no sense. Why would he even bother coming after me? Why would he kiss me if this wasn't what he wanted? "What?" I finally managed to get out, one short burst of syllable. "Why the hell not?"

He was shaking his head. "We can't do this." Daryl repeated gruffly. "We both know it won't work, Charlie. You don't wanna do this." He was shutting down, retreating back into himself. I could see it. I could hear it in his voice.

I stared at him, shaking my head with complete disbelief. "Daryl…" I uttered his name, desperately wanting to stop him from falling away from what had just happened between us. "Why don't you let me decide what I want instead of deciding for me? I want this. I want you!" I tried again, trying to catch his eyes with my own pleading gaze. He avoided looking at me, automatically took a step back and I could feel my insides shattering.

"Forget it. Go back inside, Charlie. This never happened." He said, his tone firm and leaving hardly any room for argument even if I had it in me to fight.

Instead, I felt the waves of rejection begin to roll off me. I knew he wanted this. There was no denying that. For that one, single moment, it felt like things had finally fallen into place. So why was he fighting it? Why was he trying so hard to keep me away? He gave me one last, long look before turning and stalking off into the darkness, leaving me standing there alone and more lost than ever.

* * *

_Author's Note:_

_Gotta say...I loved writing that chapter! And I really hope you guys enjoyed reading it. I know a few of you had the chance to read my author's note, which basically just said I was considering doing a Merle spin off story...I got a super positive response from that so I started writing and playing around with it last night. Hopefully it'll be up in the next couple of weeks. _

_Also I still can't figure out how to post my pictures of when I met the Walking Dead cast last weekend. I want to share them with you but I suck at technology so I'm not sure when I'll figure out how to put them on here ha! In the meantime, I added a youtube link to my profile page. If you watch the video and fast forward to the very end, you'll get to see me getting all cozy with Michael Rooker while he calls me sugar tits. It's amazing._

_Anyways, thank you all for your feedback about the Merle story idea. And as always, thank you for your support and love for this one! Getting to share my writing with people who are also crazy passionate about writing and the Walking Dead is amazing. Love you all!_

_-Nikki_


	37. Chapter 37

**_Daryl_**

**_Twenty years old_**

_The buzz was fading and I was crashing hard. The anger ignited my veins, spreading rapidly throughout my entire being, even though I knew I had no right to even feel that way. Charlie looked back at me. She was looking at me with an expression I never thought I'd see. I could tell she wanted to cry and I was the one who was making her feel that way. 'Then stop it, you fuckin' idiot!' A sober voice in the back of my mind was shouting at me. I ignored it._

_"I think all this time you were my friend because you felt bad for me. That was it, wasn't it?" I spat the words at her like acid._

_She recoiled, the look on her face falling and I knew I had done it. I had broken her. "Yes, Daryl. That's exactly it." She said, her words so quiet I could barely hear them. She turned her back and began walking down the driveway._

_"That's right, Charlie! Walk away, run as far away from me as you can get. Just like you always wanted!" I yelled after her retreating back._

_"Go to hell, Dixon!"_

_Her words stung hard than I thought they would. In just a matter of minutes, I had somehow managed to let my selfishness get the best of me and run off one of the only people who ever really gave a damn about me. I ran my hands through my hair, tugging hard at the strands. I was pissed off at her for leaving, but I was more pissed off at myself for feeling that way. I knew better than anyone I was wrong. I knew why she needed to run off, but it felt like she was leaving me here to rot. Charlie was better than this place. I had known that the entire time I knew her. She was too smart, too god damn beautiful. She deserved more than this and she sure as hell deserved better than me as a friend or anything else. I wanted more than anything to just feel happy for her like a normal person. Instead, al I felt was a toxic jealousy mixed in with the sinking feeling that I had just ruined things between us for good._

_When I glanced up again, she was gone, already disappeared onto the road and out of sight. I felt the urge to go after her, to run down the driveway and pull her back. To stop her and tell her the real reason why I hated that she was leaving me behind. I wished my mouth hadn't gotten the best of me. The very last thing I wanted was her leaving and taking with her the notion that I wanted her out of my life for good. Yet I had done a damn good job of making it seem that way. I waited for my feet to move, but I stayed still, staring down the darkened driveway. I was too damn stubborn for my own good sometimes, and I knew I would never run after her no matter how badly I wanted to. I couldn't go tell her that I hadn't meant a single word that had come out of my mouth. I was no good at sorrys. _

_Charlie had told me at the beginning of the summer she was leaving. We didn't talk much about it and I think that was because neither of us wanted to think about it. But when I pictured her leaving, it had happened in my head much differently. The things I had said to her now had fallen off my tongue so venomously when all I really wanted to tell her was..well, it was something I didn't know if I'd ever have the guts to say out loud._

_I turned back around and kicked furiously at the tire of the rusted old truck in the driveway. "Fuck! God fuckin' damn it!" I hurled the words into the air, though there was no one even there to hear them. I aimed a few more kicks at the truck before I felt my foot start to go numb. I limped around to the back of the truck, slouching against the tailgate._

_"What the hell is goin' on out here?" Merle's voice suddenly rang out. I glanced over my shoulder to see him emerging from the garage and heading towards me._

_ "None of yer' god damn business." I muttered savagely._

_"Is that so? Why the fuck are you beatin' the hell outta my poor truck, you moron? What? Ya' had a little lover's spat with the princess?" Merle said. "Why don't you grow a pair and git' the fuck over it!"_

_"Shut the hell up!"_

_"Why, watcha gon' do 'bout it?" Merle challenged, egging me on._

_"I said shut the fuck up, Merle!" I repeated. I shoved him backwards and he stumbled a few steps, laughing._

_"That's more like it. I knew you wasn't all pussy." He grinned._

_I ignored him, turning my back and glowering. _

_"Lemme guess…yer' all bent outta shape cause Miss Charlie is leavin' and ain't takin' ya with her. And she's gonna forget all 'bout you once she meets some hotshot city slicker. Am I right?" He asked gloatingly. I heard him pop open a can of beer and take a swig._

_"Somethin' like that." I mumbled. _

_"You'll git over it. Give it a week or two and you'll be over her, too." He said. "And ya know the best way to git over one chick is to get under another one." He clapped hand onto my shoulder. "So how's about we go out and find some broad to git' ya' laid, huh?"_

_"No thanks." I shrugged his hand off my shoulder and headed down to the edge of the driveway, leaving him alone. I wasn't in the mood to deal with Merle and his asshole comments or his damn idiotic ideas. None of that was helpful and all it did was piss me off more._

_I reached the end of the gravel driveway and swung left, heading away from home and away from Charlie's house, where she was no doubt holed up in her bedroom crying about what a jackass I was. Worst of all, she would probably never speak to me again, which I wasn't quite sure I could handle. My entire life Charlie had been there. Through absolutely everything she had been the one constant, unwavering figure. And now, I'd never get the nerve to tell that girl how much she meant to me. Once again, I had ruined everything and now I was going to be forced to watch yet another person I cared too much about walk out of my life for good. All because I was too chicken shit to man up and tell her what I had really wanted to say and why I was so broken up about her leaving._

_The idea of saying anything like that at all scared the crap out of me, which was why it had been so much easier to just get angry and push her away instead of telling her the truth. I had done the exact opposite of what I had meant to. Who was I kidding, though? Charlie WAS too good for me. Even if I had managed to get the words out, what were the chances of her feeling the same way? She was too good for me. I had always thought so and I knew everybody else in this god forsaken town did too. I heard the way they talked and muttered when they saw us together. They were always wondering what a girl like her would be doing hanging around a backwoods, fucked up redneck like me. They were right. What did I have to offer her? Nothing._

_I kept walking, not really thinking much about where my feet were carrying me and in what direction I was headed. All I wanted to do was to get as far away from everything as I possibly could. Maybe if I walked far enough, I'd be able to ditch all those uncomfortable, aching feelings that had gotten me into this mess in the first place. Feelings. Merle would beat the shit out of me if he knew I was thinking about things like that. Yet what the hell was I supposed to do? I tried hard to ignore them. I tried to pass them off as something else, anything else. But it was pretty hard when suddenly all I could do when Charlie showed up was think about how damn pretty she was, especially when I made her laugh. It turned my stomach, giving me an uneasy, nervous feeling I had never felt before. I would have given anything to go back to thinking about her as just the girl that lived next door, just someone to hang around and crack jokes with and nothing more._

_It all made me feel like a god damn moron. Maybe Merle was right and I was going too soft. Or maybe it was just my own fault that everybody was always leaving. At some point or another they always left. I guess there was just something about me that made people want to get away from as me as far as they could. The last person I had ever expected to drive off, though, was Charlie. The thought of not having her in my life at all anymore, though, made me feel sick to my stomach in a way I never thought I would. I kicked at a rock in my path, watching it coast off into the distance. God damn that girl. This was all her fault. She made me love her and now that feeling was going to tear me apart from the inside out._


	38. Chapter 38

"Baby's comin' any day now." Lori said, smiling happily down at her balloon shaped belly.

The corners of my lips tugged upwards into a small smile. "I can't wait to meet baby Grimes. Do you think it's gonna be a boy or girl?" I asked, watching as she absentmindedly rubbed her stomach.

"I think girl. I have a feeling, a pretty good one." She beamed at me. There was no talk of what we do when the time came to have the baby. Just normal, happy baby talk although I knew Lori was afraid of what would happen once she went into labor.

"Is this right, Charlie?" Carl asked, pushing an eraser smudged piece of paper towards me.

I pulled it towards me, my eyes quickly skimming over his cramped lettering. I finally nodded, giving him a grin. "A+. Pretty soon you're gonna be teaching me." I joked, reaching across the table to ruffle his hair.

A caught a moving figure out of the corner of my eye and glanced up to see Daryl briskly making his way through the common area and towards the outside door. I watched him go, my eyes linger after his retreating back. He didn't even spare me one single glance. I felt a sinking feeling return to the pit of my stomach. At this point, I didn't think he'd ever look at me again.

I quickly glanced away, hoping no one had yet noticed the pitiful way I had been looking at him and had been for the past week. It had felt more like a month, though. The way Daryl had started avoiding me was like a slap in the face. Especially when I remembered the heat of his mouth on mine. I don't know why he was trying so hard to avoid me. Maybe he was punishing himself for something. He was punishing me too, though. It felt like we were back to square one, only worse because now the hunter wouldn't even talk to me, let alone look at me. It had been hard to ignore the way he averted his eyes when I walked into a room, or how he just left the room altogether. Any attempt I had made at talking to him, he brushed off with some easy excuse, walking away and leaving me in his dust.

A heavy sigh escaped my lips. "I think I'll go see how Herschel is. You did a good job today, bud." I smiled at Carl. I said good-bye to Lori as well before standing up from the table and heading towards the cells. I veered off into the first one and felt a swell of happiness to see Herschel sitting up in bed, looking better than he had in days. The color had returned to his cheeks and there was even the faintest hint of a smile on his lips.

"You look good. How do you feel?" I asked, leaning against the doorway.

He shrugged his shoulders while Maggie adjusted the bandage on his leg. "Pretty good for a guy who just got his leg hacked off." He answered lightly. "Beth and Maggie were thinking I could even make it outside today. Carl found me these crutches in that medical wing." He said, nodding towards the crutches that leant against the wall.

"That's amazing, Herschel. I think I speak for everyone when I say we're incredibly glad you're still here." I said, receiving an appreciative smile from the older man, as well as one from Maggie.

"Ready to try and walk?" Beth asked happily, bounding into the room. Her spirits had been higher than ever since Herschel's miraculous recovery. It was almost contagious. I backed out of the room, giving them space to maneuver him off the bed and onto the crutches.

I hadn't realized I had just barely missed hitting Daryl as I left the room. Our shoulders brushed as he filed past me, completely unfazed by this. I felt a sudden stab of annoyance. "Daryl!" I called after him before jogging to catch up with him.

He seemed to quicken his pace. "Not now, Charlie." He said over his shoulder. Once again, the harshness of his tone stopped me dead in my tracks. I wondered why I was even trying.

"Everything okay with you two?" Carol asked, coming up behind me.

I shook my head. "Has it really ever been okay?" I turned and headed back the way I came, suddenly feeling eager to put as much distance as I could between us.

"Honey, what happened?" The older woman asked gently. When I shook my head again she took me by the elbow, steering me into the cell she had been staying in. I didn't argue, instead dropping down onto the tiny metal cot and burying my face in my hands.

"He won't even look at me." I mumbled quietly.

The bed creaked as Carol sat down next to me, rubbing my back. "Did you get into some kind of fight?"

I finally uncovered my face, staring at the blank wall in front of me. "I guess. I don't know. I took your advice and tried talking to him. For just a second he opened up, but right away shut back down. It was awful. I don't think I ever wanna try again." I admitted. I left out the part about how he kissed me, wanting to keep that little piece to myself. No one else needed to know. It was perfect, untarnished memory and I wanted to keep it safe.

"Oh, Charlie. I'm so sorry." She sighed. "Maybe he'll come around. It probably just scared him, letting himself feel that vulnerable for even just a few seconds."

"I don't know. I just feel horrible. Worse than I did before when I first got to the farm. I'd rather go back to the bickering and arguing than not talk at all." I admitted.

"He has to come around. You both are stuck here together. I doubt he really wants to ignore you forever." Carol began quietly. "He cares about you and has proved that time and time again. Just give him some space. You'll see."

I had no idea if she was right or not, but her kind words gave me a little bit of comfort at least for the moment. "Thanks, Carol." I finally said, giving her a small smile.

She nodded, giving me a tiny squeeze before standing up and pulling me to my feet. "Come on, let's go watch Herschel walk."

We made our way through the empty cellblock to join the others outside. Sure enough, Herschel was out hobbling around on his crutches. The others looked on happily, clearly glad to see him out and about instead of clinging to life in a prison cell bed.

"We'll get you a fake leg and pretty soon you'll be runnin' marathons!" Maggie grinned, watching her father blink in the bright sunlight, Beth at his side.

My smile suddenly faded. I heard the familiar horrible sounds before I saw them. Before I could cry out any sort of warning, walkers were streaming into the yard. They must have torn a hole through the fence somehow.

"Go! Get back inside!" I shouted, pushing Maggie towards Lori and Carl. I watched them disappear inside the prison, noticing Beth and Herschel had locked themselves in one of the fenced in entryways. I quickly turned, rushing to join the fight.

Daryl was suddenly blocking my path. "Get inside the prison. Now!" He yelled over the chaos.

I was momentarily surprised at the fact that he was even speaking to me, but my anger quickly overshadowed that. "What? Hell no! You can't ignore me for a week and then suddenly give me orders!" I said coldly.

I tried to side step around him to where Rick was firing off rounds but he shoved me back. "Charlie, god damn it, for just once do what I fuckin' say! Go inside and help Lori! I don't want you out here!" His said forcefully, his eyes pleading with me.

"Someone cut the fence!" Glenn was yelling over the noise.

Suddenly, the shrill sound of an alarm sounded over the prison speakers. I covered my ears, realizing with horror two things; that the sound would draw in walkers for miles and that someone else was in the prison with us.

"We ain't alone here! Whoever it is must have started the back-up generators!" Rick hollered, voicing my exact thoughts.

I looked back at Daryl and gave him a nod, knowing that now wasn't the time to argue. It didn't stop me, though, from wondering what the hell his deal was. If he kept pushing and pulling me in different directions like this, my head would be spinning so fast I wouldn't be able to see straight. I pushed the thoughts aside as I rushed inside the prison. The cellblock was empty and I realized they must have disappeared into the corridors in an attempt to hide. I swallowed back my fear of what was back there and rushed in after them.

"Lori! Carl!" I called, blindly running through the shadowy halls. I stumbled over the remains of a decaying corpse, spilling onto the concrete floor. A hand grasped my arm and I let out a terrified scream expecting to look up into the face of a walker. Instead, I saw Maggie and breathed a giant sigh of relief. "Thank Jesus!" I cried as she helped me to my feet.

"Walkers are everywhere! There's nowhere to go!" She said, sounding panicky. "We've been hiding in the boiler room." She pulled my inside a doorway and slammed the metal door shut behind us. Her eyes swept my face and couldn't ignore the horrified expression in her eyes. "Lori is in labor. I don't know what to do!" She whispered, her voice shaking.

I felt my eyes widen and pushed past her. I walked further into the room to find Lori sprawled on her back, Carl hovering over her. They both glanced up as I approached, looking relieved to see me. This made me feel both better and worse at the same time because even though I was there, I still had no idea what to do.

"She tried pushing, but she's hemorrhaging too badly. She wants me to cut her open." Maggie said as I knelt down at Lori's side and grasped her hand.

"You've got to, Maggie. I'll lose the baby." She said tearfully. "Please. Save my baby." She looked between us, her eyes pleading desperately. I could hear Carl sniffling and avoided looking at him, knowing seeing his face would just break me down completely.

"Okay, okay. I'll do it." I said hurriedly.

"Thank you, Charlie. Thank you." Lori said, her voice thick with tears. I let go of her hand as Carl fell to her side. I looked away for a moment, allowing them to have a chance to say good-bye. I glanced behind me at Maggie to see tears were full on streaming down her face as well. God, was this really happening? Was I really about to deliver a baby?

"Okay, Charlie. I'm ready now." Lori's voice drew me back in.

I looked back at her, feeling the familiar tightening in my throat as I fought the urge to cry. I smoothed back her hair and nodded. There were a thousand things I wanted to say to her right now, but I knew there wasn't enough time. Mostly, I wanted to thank her for showing me so much kindness. She was growing fainter with every passing second, though. I unsheathed my knife, cleaning off as best I could on my shirt. I swallowed hard, taking a deep breath before placing the tip of the blade to her ripe belly. Her screams of pain almost made me stop, but I knew I couldn't now. I needed to get the baby out. The horrible sounds subsided almost as quickly as they began as she began to bleed out. The next second, I was pulling a crying, writhing baby out and cradling it in my arms. I cut the cord as Maggie handed me her jacket to wrap the baby in. I held its tiny, warm body close to my chest as its small cries filled the room. I looked down to see it was a girl, with a perfect mop of untidy dark hair, its pink face scrunched up as it continued to wails.

"It's a girl." I said, a smile flitting across my lips. I exchanged the happy look with Maggie, but it quickly vanished as I looked back at Lori, bleeding out on the concrete floor. Carl stood over here, his gun in his hand. He looked up at me. The tears had stopped, but the hardened expression in their place set me on edge.

"I have to. If we leave her here, she'll turned." He said quietly.

I nodded, turning my back on him to give him some privacy. Maggie and I stood near the door, waiting. I cringed as a gunshot echoed loudly through the room. A second later, Carl was brushing past us on his way out of the room. He led the way back to the cellblock, taking out half a dozen walkers on his way. I watched him, feeling as if I was in a dream. I didn't know what this would do to him, but I knew it couldn't be good. No child should have to watch their own mother die like that. No child should have to pull the trigger to make sure their mother stayed dead. My heart broke as I thought about Lori lying there, never even having the chance to hold her baby or hear her daughter's cries.

The sounds of the alarm had stopped, which I knew meant the others had found whoever was responsible and taken care of it. It gave me only a small feeling of relief, dreading the moment when the others would have to be told about Lori's passing. We finally made it to our cellblock and emerged from the prison and into the bright sunlight of the afternoon. It didn't seem right, for it to be such a beautiful day while such horrible things were happening.

The baby girl was still crying in my arms as I held her close, carefully making my way back out into the yard. I saw Beth and Herschel first. Maggie let out a cry of happiness, running to them. I watched the three of them embrace before my eyes continued to search the yard. Fallen walkers were strewn everywhere, but it seemed quiet aside from the crying coming from the bundle in my arms. I saw Rick before he saw me and took a few steps towards him. He finally met my gaze, a look of awe dawning on his face as he realized what I was holding. He made a move to meet me, but froze. He began to look around wildly and I bit my bottom lip, trying desperately to hold back the tears because I knew he wouldn't find what he was looking for. When he finally looked back at me, I wished more than anything I could remedy the desperation in his eyes. Instead, all I could do was shake my head as the tears finally broke through and streamed freely down my cheeks.

"No." The word was a broken whisper as it left his lips. "No!" He cried louder. He ran his hands through his hair, pacing the yard. I could see the sobs wracking his body as he came to terms with what had happened to his wife. It was unbearable, watching the man I knew as a strong leader break down so completely right in front of me. He fell to his knees and I forced my eyes away, unable to watch any longer as he self-destructed. I could have sworn I felt his pain. It radiated off of every inch of him, latching on to everyone who stood too close. He had lost his other half. He had lost a piece of himself.

"Here, let me." I heard Beth's quiet voice at my side. I mechanically handed off the baby to her, realizing I was shaking, my hands and entire front caked with the redness of blood. Lori's blood. I felt a pair of eyes on me and looked up to see Daryl watching me. His eyes bore into mine, the message behind them unreadable but there all the same. I averted my gaze to my dirty, tattered sneakers. "Why don't you go get cleaned up, Charlie?" The younger girl said again. I nodded numbly, meeting Daryl's eyes one last time before my feet led me back into the prison that I was slowly beginning to see as less and less of safe house with each passing day.


End file.
